Yes. Their lawyer, Mr. Lucass had gotten everything sorted out in record time. And with their private ship, ‘The Star-Destroyer’, the soldiers of the Amethyst League were ready to give the right-winged smack-down upon the liberal Tamer would dare to impose numerous copyright-infringements on their god-given right to register and trademark what was theirs!
“Koo... Haa... Now, march in time to the Imperial Beat, kiddos. Da da DA dadada da da DA! Da da DA dadada da da DAAA.”
And so the marching and Invader’s constant ‘da da da’ing continued as the Troopstormers followed him into the Indigo continent. So it wasn’t any surprise that one would snap and shout, “Shut up, Vader.”
This caused Invader to stop suddenly. The squad of Troopstormers did as well, knowing it would be best to shut up and be afraid for their very lives.
“Koo... Haa... What did you say?” Invader asked, turning to the Troopstormers, somehow knowing which one had spoken out, considering they all looked the same in their uniform armors.
“N-nothing, Lord Invader!” The Troopstormer sputtered out.
“Koo... Haa... You were trying to go over my helmet, weren’t you? Giving me others like that?” Darth Invader questioned seriously, anger evident in his voice, even with his respirator/life-support for his penis going.
“Of-of course not, Lord Invader!” The Troopstormer shouted in a squeal, his knees trembling. “Maybe around it, or to the side, but never over-”
“SILENCE!” Darth Invader shouted. “You know the price for going against me and my orders... Koo... Haa...”
“NO!” The Troopstormer shouted in fear, while his fellow soldiers broke a rank and started to stand away from the doomed sap. “Not the Force! Not the Force!” The Troopstormer cried, dropping his castor and holding onto his neck with his hands.
“Koo... Haa... No... Koo... Haa...” Darth Invader spoke ominously. “I have something much, MUCH worse in store for you...” And so, instead of reaching for his dildo, er, ‘saberlighter’, he pulled out a ring.
“OH SHIT!” The Troopstormer shouted. “Anything but that! Please, please Lord Invader, don’t use-”
“Yes...” Darth Invader spoke out. “The Shwartz!” He said evilly as he clenched his hand into a fist.
Falling to his knees, the Troopstormer shrieked like a schoolgirl, his hands going to his crotch, but obviously offering no protection. “AAAAHHHHHH! JESUS H. CHRIST, IT HURTS!!!” The Troopstormer screamed, his voice going from a low baritone to a rather high soprano.
Finally, opening his hand, the Troopstormer fell to the ground, whimpering like a baby. The other Troopstormers looked on in sympathy.
“Koo... Haa... So... Koo... Haa... Does anyone ELSE have any complaints about the Imperial March?” He asked, looking around.
Amazingly, one Troopstormer WAS stupid enough to raise his hand. “Uh, Mr. Lord and General Darth Invader sir?”
Though I could not be seen past his mask, Darth Invader rolled his eyes. “Koo... Haa... What is it? Koo... Haa...”
“Well...” The Troopstormer gulped. “Couldn’t we sing something else?”
Considering that request for a moment, Darth Invader nodded his head. “Yes. Koo... Haa... That would be most useful.”
“R-really?” The Troopstormer asked in surprise.
“Koo... Haa... Yes... Koo... Haa...” Darth Invader looked at the Troopstormer and said. “Get singing.”
“But, I don’t know any marching songs,” The Troopstormer started to say, until he saw Invader raise his hand to make a first. “ButIcanmakesomethingup!” The Troopstormer added hastily to literally save his nuts.
“Good... Koo... Haa...” Darth Invader said. “Now get cracking before I do.”
(------)
As a boy, this walking disaster roamed free. What did he think about it? What did he do? What he was known as before he became the first man ever to be declared a natural disaster, is unknown. All this mysterious man in red was known as now, was a Gym Leader, one still celebrated for his victories while hunted down like a scourge of the earth, like some member of Team Rocket. He was Vash the Stampede.
Earlier than a HotChick’s crow, children on a Sunday, and the morning newspaper. Vash got up early in the morning.
His morning meditation theme: “Life and Love”
The man in red, (although currently in flannel pajamas) sat on the PkéCenter bed in a lotus position, trying to clear his mind of all that went on around the world, and contemplate if the mysterious mayfly known as love still existed...
For all of three seconds before falling over, a snot-bubble on his nose.
(------)
Ranma continued too perform his kata without pause. Punch, kick, it was all in the mind.
He moved without flaw as he continued to go through the movement on the kata of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts on instinct. Once he started to get back into it, it was coming back to him with ease. It gave Ranma some comfort to know he hadn’t lost his touch.
Five roundhouse kicks followed by an uppercut and a mid-air kick as he came down. Which then went into a cartwheel elbow smash as soon as his first foot came upon the ground. And finishing the cartwheel in a crouching position, he then did a somersault kick into the air, again and again and again, once more defying the laws of gravity as he went higher with each movement.
And upon landing on both his feet, Ranma thrust his arms out to the side in a jackknife punch, slashing upwards and then down again, while performing a forward hopping judo kick.
Then, to top it off, Ranma cupped his hands together, gathering his chi one more. It was coming to him much easier. Now that his reserves had practically been doubled since he killed the Pokégirl World’s analogue of himself. Heh. The world was a better place without the bastard anyway.
Pushing thoughts of Sextome out of his mind, Ranma continued to gather energy, his hands starting to glow, barely containing the energy held between his two palms. Then, thrusting his hands up towards the sky, Ranma let out a rather large ball of chi as he practically roared. The luminescent ball of life energy shot upwards into the sky without stop, until it was out of view.
Wiping his brow of sweat, Ranma was thoroughly impressed with himself. “Damn, it isn’t in view anymore and I can still feel the energy,” He thought seriously. Just how far would that ball of chi keep going anyway was beyond Ranma, but it did reaffirm one thing. “I’ve gotten way-too-strong.”
However, before Ranma could contemplate on it further, he heard a voice call out to him. “Master?” The voice spoke tentatively.
Turning to look at the source of the voice, there was Mitsuko, wearing one of the PokéCenter bathrobes. “Heya, Mitsuko!” Ranma said with a smile while waving to her.
Yet, she couldn’t really bring herself to react, just staring at her Tamer. She couldn’t believe he had actually done that. He was better than a Herochan!
“What?” Ranma asked as his Vixxen stayed quiet, just staring back at him in shock. “Do I have something on my face?”
The answer Ranma got to that was his rather sexy Vixxen face-faulting.
(------)
“I don’t know what I’ve been told!” One Troopstormer chanted.
“I don’t know what I’ve been told!” The other Troopstormers chorused right after that first Troopstormer chanted.
“The Emperor is mighty old!” That same head Troopstormer chanted.
“The Emperor is mighty old!” The other Troopstormers chorused in as they continued to march along towards Greenpeace.
“Koo Haa... How old?” Darth Invader asked in tune.
“We don’t know!” The Troopstormers chanted back.
“Koo Haa... Pretty good, but needs a fine tuning.” Darth Invader admitted after awhile. “Now again!”
“I don’t know what I’ve been told...” That first Troopstormer started again
(------)
It was quite an event for Dr. Theodore Diggers. Having to actually been invited to hand in a thesis on the ever-evolving theory on pokégirl cloning to the big-wigs of the Shadow League personally, Theo was able to see his old buddy, the head of the Shadow League, Mr. Tom Clancy once more. What other reason his old friend could have for wanting him to come in person was unknown to Theo, but still...
...It wasn’t proving to be all that helpful in the slightest for the aging Pokégirl Researcher. Sitting across in Mr. Clancy’s office Theo asked, “Tom, are you sure you can’t find my girls yet?”
Raising an eyebrow as he looked up from the papers handed to him, Tom answered, in an unnerving manner. “I find your lack of faith... Disturbing, Theo.”
“Um...” Theo became very pale before choking all of a sudden. “Ach! Ack! Argh...”
And then a hand whapped him on the back, dislodging the peanut stuck in his throat.
*SLAP*!
“Cough, cough...” Theo wheezed, trying to catch his breath again.
Looking at his friend across the desk, Tom asked, “You okay there, Theodore?”
“Ah yeah... Went down the wrong pipe...” He said in embarrassment as he motioned to the peanut on Tom’s forehead. Turning his head to look at his savior, he saw a dark-skinned pokégirl with the ever familiar markings on her head. “Who’s the Megami?”
Clancy sweated a little as he looked over at the Megami who had reseated herself in the corner of his office and started knitting again. “Um... She’s part of one of my better agents and Gym Leaders’ harem...."
“Oh...” Theo said in understanding. “So why is she here, and for that matter why am I here?”
“You’re here because I wanted you to present your latest report to me personally...” Tom said in all seriousness, his voice leaving no room for error. “That and you needed to get out of the house. And she...” His eyes looked over to the Megami pokégirl. “I don’t know why she’s here... All she’ll say is she’s checking on a project of her’s...”
“Project?” Theo asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Don’t ask Theo, don’t ask...” Tom groaned. “Even I don’t really want to know with that Megami...”
“And the knitting?” Tom asked, motioning to the little booties the Megami was making.
“All she says is it’s for her and her master’s kittens,” Tom said as he rubbed the temples of his head after putting the papers down.
Looking at his friend disbelievingly, Theo started to say, “Megami can’t have-”
“Don’t say another word Theo,” Tom interrupted his old friend. “Trust me. You DON’T know anything about this Megami... And you better hope you never do...”
Now becoming very curious, Theo tried, “...What are you....”
“No Theo, just drop it. She creeps me out enough as it is...” Tom shivered. “I know who she is, what she is and it is very unsettling Theo, so let’s just leave it at that... And don’t ask any questions.”
“All right...” Theo said reluctantly. But he couldn’t help but wonder, was there any real reason for him having to deliver the papers besides an excuse to get out of the house?
(------)
“I don’t know what to make of this call!” One Troopstormer chanted.
“I don’t know what to make of this call!” The other Troopstormers chorused right after that first Troopstormer chanted.
“The Emperor is mighty small!” That head Troopstormer chanted solo again.
“The Emperor is mighty small!” The other Troopstormers chorused in as they continued to march along towards Greenpeace.
“Koo Haa... How small?” Darth Invader asked in tune, trying to contain his smile.
“He’s only got one ball!” The Troopstormers chanted back.
“Koo Haa... It’s getting better.” Darth Invader admitted after awhile. “Now try again Colonel Sanders, and this time make sure it makes more sense!”
“I don’t know what to make of this call...” That first Troopstormer, now revealed to be Sanders started again.
(------)
Technique Training. Three Hours.
Still dressed in his pajamas, Vash held up a Chickenlittle egg. Tossing it up high, he drew his castor from his holder and held up it, balancing the egg on the barrel.
He then brought his hand all the way down suddenly with the castor, and then brought it back up to catch the egg. The small source of protein hadn’t even had a chance to fall, Vash was so fast.
Again and again, Vash did this, catching the egg time and again with his castor...
...Until he missed, causing a mess on the floor.
“Oops.”
Scratching the back of his head, Vash sighed. “Well, there goes breakfast.”
(------)
“Master...” Mitsuko asked cutely as she got up from the ground, wiping some of the dirt and grass from the PokéCenter lawn.
“Yeah, Mitsuko?” Ranma asked back, wondering why she was looking at him like that. It was almost unnerving.
“That... Was...” A smile soon erupted on her face. “AWESOME!”
Raising an eyebrow, Ranma asked, “Eh?”
Nodding her head rapidly, Mitsuko began to churr. “Yes, Master! Why didn’t you tell me you were so talented? I mean, I never knew a Tamer could perform pokégirl techniques. And that was definitely an Amazon-type’s Chi Blast!”
Ranma blinked his eyes. “Say what?”
Churring louder, Mitsuko ran up to her Tamer to give him a big hug. “Churr... I got the best master ever!” She squealed in delight.
Chuckling nervously, Ranma hugged the Vixxen back. Okay. She didn’t seem upset because he could do this stuff at least. “Uh... Glad you like?” He said, unsure if that was what he should be saying to her.
Mitsuko just continued to churr. She had such a brave, strong and handsome Tamer. She couldn’t ask for anything better.
(------)
“I don’t know, but I’ve heard tale!” Colonel Sanders chanted.
“I don’t know, but I’ve heard tale!” The other Troopstormers chorused right after that first Troopstormer chanted.
“The Emperor is mighty frail!” Colonel Sanders chanted once more.
“The Emperor is mighty frail!” The other Troopstormers chorused in as they continued to march along towards Greenpeace.
“Koo Haa... How frail?” Darth Invader asked in tune.
“He can’t get no tail!” The Troopstormers chanted back.
“Yes... Koo Haa... The Force is Strong in this song. Koo Haa...” Darth Invader admitted with an evil chuckle. “Now again!”
“I don’t know, but I’ve heard tale...” Colonel Sanders started again.
(------)
His eye twitching, Emperor Phallustit had a chill go up his spine. “Oh, I don’t know who yet, but someone’s going to pay through the nose...”
(Something Else)
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(Posted Sat, 19 Jun 2004 17:59)
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