Sitting atop a large cloth-bag full of women’s unmentionables, Happōsai guffawed maniacally, occasionally sipping from a jar of sake. Underneath, doing the running for him, Genma Saotome was wearing the typical thief-mask, as well as a suffering expression. Mostly because his master was giving incentive for or his ‘steed’ to go faster by whacking Genma with a long crop.
Next to them, Sōun Tendō was also fleeing. Wearing the same attire and carrying a bag of stolen goods, he was also crying like a baby from the indignity endured for the sake of the art.
Behind the trio was, of course, a crowd of outraged women of various ages, brandishing many improvised bludgeoning weapons and quite decided to use them to bring holy smackdown on the perverted gang of lingerie-thieves. Along the furies were, for good measure, a few enraged shopkeepers and restaurateurs, similarly intent on punishing the indelicate patrons.
Yes, even in a Hentaiverse, some things actually never change.
So, it would be no surprise that the founder of Anything Goes deemed, one day, that his two main students were definitely having it too easy. Lounging around in the Dōjō while letting Kasumi do all the work was fine and dandy for a nice and dignified senior citizen, but not for those two good-for-nothing slackers. So, when Happy stated a week ago that a little workout would do them great good, Genma and Sōun were quite enthusiastic... in trying to take a frantic leave. But the old goat didn’t let them slip away, and now they were giving a helpful (if not entirely willing) hand at liberating precious female underwear from their slavery.
Behind Saotome’s stoic face and Tendō’s sobbing one were two very unhappy middle-aged martial artists. Not only did they endure the gnome’s tyranny for seven days in a row, but the impromptu training trip had prevented them from taking advantage of this period of vacation to push their reluctant children together. While Ranma and Akane were out of high school, they had planned to force them to spend more time together — so that they finally admit their feelings for each other — and marry them on the spot. This was foolproof, they were sure of it, all they had needed was a little time... and here they were stuck doing the pushy master’s dirty job.
Sōun was also worried sick about leaving his precious daughters to fend off alone for a full week. They were so innocent; who knew what kind of men could try to take advantage of them during their father’s absence? Sure they had Ranma-kun around, but the boy tended more to attract trouble then repel it. The youngsters direly needed parental guidance. Who know what kind of catastrophe could befell on the Tendō Dōjō without his level-headed presence?
Genma, while not over-dramatizing things like his friend, was himself quite annoyed. And not just by Happy’s painful whipping-into-shape (though it was a major part of it). Ranma had shown more of an independent streak lately; no doubt the bad influence of his mother. Now, the ungrateful spawn was listening less and less to the enlightened wisdom of his selfless father. And just when the whelp had to be watched over closely — as he tended to disappear more and more often, giving little to no explanation afterward — Genma was drafted away by his much-despised sensei. Life was so unfair.
Happy continued cackling with mirth as the chase went on. If he had any further motives in dragging away the dimwitted duo just when the kids had free time and no school, he was keeping them to himself.
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(Posted Sat, 19 Jun 2004 15:50)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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