Ranma simply sat back and waited for the girl next to him to stop complaining so he could speak. “I tried to tell you,” he said. “Grabbing chestnuts out of fire is the end result of the technique. Trying to o it at the beginning is just plain stu-foolish.” The thought of his own father trying the technique and ending up getting his gi on fire came to mind. At least Kassy had drawn her arm out after only just touching the flame, so she wasn’t really hurt.
“No you didn’t! You said it was the basic training,” Kassy yelled.
“Well… yeah,” Ranma replied. “Then after I got that fast I had to learn how to punch where I wanted. When you’re moving you hands that fast you can’t really aim.” Although all he had really been able to do was grab things in the same general area, and punch someone in the exact same spot.
For a moment Kassy just frowned at him, then took her hand out of the water. There didn’t seem to be any real damage, just a little tingling. She probably had her Salusian endurance to thank for that. “So, now what, you want me to put my hand in a blender?”
“Weren’t you the one who wanted this training?” Ranma asked with a raised eyebrow. “Besides, all that is, is hand eye coordination and reflex training, it’s almost useless in Anything Goes Martial Arts Hockey. Even today’s dodging exercises are just warm ups till we can get some skates or… go to the ice ring.” Ranma gave a quick shudder as memories he tried to suppress quickly resurfaced and he had the sudden urge to throw up.
“THEN YOU BEANED ME IN THE HEAD FOR NOTHING?” Kassy shouted right into the pigtailed boy’s face, her own twisted in rage before taking a mallet and getting ready to pound him like a nail.
“B-But this is just a warm up exercise!” Ranma exclaimed. “And I have to show you the forms!”
Freezing in mid-bash, Kassy raised her mallet back up and looked at Ranma in confusion. “Forms? What? I gotta fill out papers too?”
"Uh, no."
"Good."
WHACK
(-A few Minutes Later-)
“Okay,” Ranma began as he stood a few feet away from Kassy. In their hands, each held a steel pipe about the same length as the hockey sticks Kassy had used two days ago in her fight. “Now when using pretty much any weapon to fight with, there are ten places that any attack will center on. They are: the head, shoulders, arms, wrists, the chest, stomach, and legs.”
“What about the knees?” Kassy asked.
“Okay and the knees… I guess,” Ranma replied.
“And the neck?”
“Well, yeah… you can get hit there too,” he admitted.
“And the crotch?” Kassy asked. “Lots of people go for the-”
“Are you going to let me finish?” Ranma demanded. Kassy sighed, and then nodded after rolling her eyes. “… Anyway, since any attack is going to focus on these… thirteen parts, you have to read where the attack is going to go, then learn to defend and counter-attack without being thrown off balance.”
“Okay,” Kassy said hesitantly. “But, shouldn’t we be using something heavier? You know, build up my strength or something?”
“No,” Ranma told her. “You’re plenty strong enough. Besides, if you’re using a weapon that’s balanced and weighted differently than the one you’re going to use in a fight, then it defeats the entire purpose of training to use that weapon.”
“Then what was the point of having me jump around for over half an hour when you were throwing rocks at me?” Kassy demanded. “You just said that I’ll have to do it on skates next time, and even I know dodging something while roller blading is a lot harder than by just running and jumping around!”
“I-It teaches you to think and react quickly!” Ranma quickly countered.
For a moment Kassy just stood there, giving the pigtailed boy the female glare of death, then suppressed her rage with obvious effort. “Well then come on, let’s hurry up and get this over with.”
Meanwhile, in another district of Tokyo…
“So for the crimes of stealing woman’s undergarments,” a rather well endowed woman proclaimed as she read from a rather long piece of paper in her hands. “We are hereby sentencing you to the crime of catapult!” Looking down from the paper, the CEO of RAW (Righteous Angry Women) looked over to the assembled crowed gathered around her, each with either a pitchfork or blazing torch in hand, and then to the wooden contraption next to her, with the tiny perverts seal covered prison sat, almost begging to be launched. “Do you have any last words?”
“How can you punish an old man for trying to partake of his one joy in life?” a cried an old voice from a metal coffin.
“Like this!” The woman said before pulling the leaver next to her and launching the canned pervert into the distance, then smiling to herself as a satisfying splash reached her ears. “Okay, next up… Ataru Moroboshi!”
“All I ever wanted was a harem, was that too much to ask?”
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(Posted Wed, 25 Aug 2004 02:28)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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