Asuka rushed through the opening doors to the LCL pool that contained her EVA. She didn't stick around for explanations from the engineers; she only wanted to see what had happened to her beloved EVA unit. She had expected that some nut had done something really weird like... like... give her EVA unit big boobs, like she now had (proportioned for an EVA unit, of course).
She was unprepared for what she saw.
"It's... PINK!" she gasped.
Well, strictly speaking her new mecha was pink and white. Not that Asuka cared. Rather than the blood red of her former EVA 02, this mecha was predominantly pink. It was also looked more human, rather than the usual Quasimodo look of the EVA units. As a matter of fact, it looked like a metal rendition of a female human, quite attractively rendered and complete with a pair of rather large breasts.
"Are those pigtails?!" she barked in disbelief, referring to the two flexible cord-like things hanging from two rounded projections mounted atop the head of the mecha. The face looked grim with it's scowl, but very humanlike.
The Second Child couldn't stand it any longer. She stomped back to the hangar control bay where the engineers were pouring over her new mecha's specs. She roughly grabbed one of them out of his chair and roared, "What is going on here?!! My EVA now looks like it's cosplaying as Sailor Moon! If this is a joke, I find it definitely not funny!"
The scowling visage of half-German Japanese girl bearing her teeth had a large effect on the hapless engineer. He simply babbled. The babble will not be reproduced here, but they were words to the effect of that they didn't really know what was happening themselves. Asuka was about to ask more when she spotted the damp spot covering the engineer's crotch and the puddle forming underneath him.
She tsked and tossed him aside, storming toward a more senior engineer that looked cool and collected. "I'm going to assume that you guys had no part in kidnapping my EVA and replacing it with this..." Asuka paused, glancing over at the well-endowed robot sitting in the LCL pool, then forced out her words, "...this flimsy excuse for fanboy service! What were you boneheads doing when this happened? Don't you guard these things?"
The senior engineer glanced at Asuka's rather prominent bosom before answering. "We were doing our job, checking the onboard systems of the EVA, when before our eyes our readings changed, and your EVA changed into that, as you say, 'flimsy excuse for fanboy service'," he said. "The physical configuration completely changed, the weapons systems changed, the control system changed... heck, the underlying technology changed, as we watched and over a few seconds. It also seems to have an additional identification string. Not only is it 'EVA 01', it's also 'Neo Okusar'."
Asuka's jaw dropped. "It sounds like a name you'd give one of those really old giant anime robots. Like, from the seventies."
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(Posted Wed, 20 Oct 2004 21:27)
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