Asuka smiled at the sad dweeb malevolently. The nerve of him telling her how wonderful it must be to pilot an Eva and how much he envied her.
Leaving the dumb idiot for now she casually stepped over his even dumber buddy who was still moaning one the floor towards Rei who seemed to be an island of normalcy in this madhouse of a school.
First she was almost bored to death by that teacher and then, when the other students had found out that she was the pilot who had fought the angel, she got mobbed by fans and wellwishers. Not that she did not appreciate that they wanted to pay proper respects to their saviour. But some like 'dumb and dumber' over here just went too far.
"He is unlikely to be accepted as a pilot candidate as the Evangelion unit is primarily designed to interface with female pilots," Rei commented.
"I was thinking that we could smuggle him into the geofront and dunk him into one of the tentaclepits until he had enough," Asuka revealed her plan.
"The true nature of the Evangelion synchronization mechanism is classified and not supposed to be revealed to outsiders. And NERV has very heavy physical security," Rei cautioned.
"Then I guess he will have to settle for something equally enjoyable," Asuka relented, "I am sure that Dr. Akagi and her bunch of mad-scientist are always on the lookout for volunteers for on of their sick experiments. We can enroll him in the nastiest experiment we can find and tell him all the disclaimers about not suing for potential irreversible psychological damage are just there to scare away cowardly would be pilots."
Rei seemed to consider this. She obviously had not been to taken with Kensuke's enthusiasm either even if she did not express her feelings as openly as Asuka.
"I have heard that the medical faculty is testing new automated procedures for proctological examinations and colonoscopies." Rei finally said, "They have been having trouble finding patients for their study after some software glitches in an earlier version of their apparatus caused a few tragic accidents."
"That will do for a start," Asuka decided gleefully, "We will have to see if we can sign up his jock friend, too."
Rei looked at were Toji Suzuhara still lay in considerable pain holding his privates. The class representative was currently bend over him and trying to asses the damage.
"It was perhaps unfortunate of Mr. Suzuhara to phrase his well-meant but unsolicited constructive criticism of your fighting style the way he did," Rei acknowledged.
Asuka snorted. The idiot was lucky to have gotten away with just one kick for his comments.
"I will ask Misato if they can fix a sign on my Eva to tell people where to stick their criticism," Asuka mused, "Something like 'How is my piloting? Call Argh!" painted on the soles of the Eva."
Rei did not comment on this.
"I any way, I think I have head as much idiocy today as I can stand. Let's leave before I am forced to hurt somebody who doesn't deserve it," Asuka suggested.
"The school day has not yet ended," Rei pointed out.
"I saw that you were just as bored as everyone else during the 2nd impact lecture. I don't think I could sit through another one like it," Asuka implored her, "Come on it is not as if we would miss anything important if we left now. And the teachers won't dare to stop us if we decided to leave. They are all to afraid of NERV."
"It would be against my orders to commit truancy. However if you were to leave it would be my duty to accompany you," Rei rationalized.
Rei and Asuka turned to leave, but were held back by an outraged screech.
"Stop!" a angry girl's voice made them turn, "I won't allow you to skip school."
Asuka calmly looked the girl over.
"You are Hikari Horaki, the class representative aren't you," Asuka asked.
"Yes I am," she acknowledged, "and I am not impressed by you, little miss hero. You might have blinded the others, but I know your kind. With your connections at NERV and everyone being in awe of you because of your piloting gig — you think you are above our rules. Just because you sat in that big robot you think you are somebody better. You come her and disrespect our teachers. You announce you pilot status so that everyone can worship you. And when somebody makes a critical remark you have to kick him in the nuts. And now you are even corrupting Rei and trying to make her skip school with you. I will make sure that the school rules are enforced."
Asuka considered slapping some sense into the stupid chick but decided against it. She knew her type, too. Little tin pot autocrats who got drunk on a tiny bit of power given to them. They inflated their own self-worth by inflating the importance of whatever post they had been given. They came down like a ton of bricks on anyone who threatened to expose the flimsiness of their little empire by ignoring their precious rules.
She had thought that the law-and-order and by-the-book types she had left behind in Germany had been bad, but they had nothing on this girl. 'Rise, bow and sit' indeed.
"Well then have fun enforcing the rules. I am sure there is somebody with his shirt untucked around here that you could sit straight. Goodbye," She told the girl and then to Rei," Come on, Rei, we are leaving."
Ignoring people like Hikari was really one of the worst things you could do to them.
Snatching Rei's hand she stepped around the stupefied class representative. Some of the other students who had witnessed the confrontation giggled.
Hikari did not follow.
"So, Rei," she asked after they had left the building, "now that we have escaped that place, what do you do for fun around here?"
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(Posted Mon, 31 Jan 2005 23:24)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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