They weren't fighting within the dojo; they were bouncing against the outside walls and the roof in a battle where all of the blows occurred over six feet above the ground.
For obvious reasons, Genma wanted to avoid the pond. Getting his son wet wasn't an indication of his superiority, it was an indication that he allowed his adversary to power up, and that he was in for one hell of a beating. And getting wet himself would be an unacceptable admission of his son's skill over his own.
So Genma decided to fight over the dojo, while he tried to decide how to talk Soun into installing a bramble bush, or jagged rocks, or broken glass in his yard. Maybe he'd go for a big flame pit!
After breakfast, Akane, Nabiki, and Ranma proceeded to school.
As the three of them were running to school, Akane laid out some ground rules. "Remember! Nothing about the engagements at school! They're weird enough without them talking about us marrying in high school!"
"No problem. It's just a scam we're running on our parents after all."
Before Akane or Nabiki could react, Ranma was hit by water from the ladle of an old woman laying the dust on her front walk. Apparently she didn't hold with the traditional method of casting water downwards onto the ground, but managed to hit Ranma in the face, five feet above her target. "Why me?"
Nabiki grabbed Ranma's wet shirt and schoolbag from the ground, leaving Akane to pick up Ranma's shoes, trousers, and boxers, trying to hold the boxers through the trousers 'lest she touch a boy's underwear. "I guess I'll go home."
"Come on. I know where we can get hot water on the way."
"Dr. Tofu, can we use your bathroom?"
"Sure. What are the extra clothes for?"
"You'll see."
Nabiki and Akane turned on the hot water faucet, left the clothes, and exited the room, closing the door behind them.
"What's going on?"
"Just wait for it."
Someone turned off the hot water, which puzzled Dr. Tofu further. Akane and Nabiki just grinned. A minute later a sulking Ranma exited fully dressed as Nabiki announced "Tadaaah! Instant boyfriend. Just add hot water. Clothing extra."
"Never! Never will I allow you to date the fair Akane!"
"This is no place to have a fight. Follow me!"
"You idiot! This is the third floor!"
"Thank goodness there's a pool there."
"Aaaargh! Why does it always have to be water?" Ranma hit the water, and phased through his clothes. Luckily, his invisibility allowed him to avoid Kuno's groping hands.
Unfortunately, his water landing was observed by his entire class. "Look! Ranma's water soluble!"
Eventually Kuno climbed out of the pool, and started crowing about his victory. "He's such a coward, he ran away, leaving his clothes as a decoy! Truly he's not a real man!"
Then for reasons beyond the understanding of the observers, Kuno flipped over and landed in the pool flat on his back. "That didn't hurt." he lied.
"Kuno, listen to me, and I'll explain things to you in small words. Before we were born, my father engaged one of us to the son of his best friend in order to insure that our schools continue. This is an honor-pledge that none of us can argue against. The man he made the promise with showed up last night demanding we marry his son. This man is the bad guy. Understand so far?"
"All he and my father have to do is go down to the registry and declare Akane is married," Nabiki lied, "and there would be nothing any of us could do. If that were to happen, Akane would never be yours.
"Luckily his son is a man of honor, and agreed to fight the engagement, even though he finds all of us attractive. He was willing to sacrifice his happiness to prevent making Akane marry him against her will. He's the only one who could save her. Isn't he a good guy?
"Now this saint, the only ally that the Tendo sisters can count on, our protector, is the same person you've attacked twice today, and tried to drive from our high school. If you've managed to drive our friend and ally away from Akane, you've doomed her to be married against her will, because of my father, and the evil Genma, and you will never see Akane again.
"And not only did you attack the man who is making it possible that you might one day wed Akane, you also called him a 'cur', a 'scoundrel', a 'base knave', 'unworthy', 'not a true man', a 'coward', and you ran through the school shouting about how he was trying to date Akane, which is a lie, and which you decided because you were too stupid to wait until I had finished talking. All this on his first day in a new school.
"Now, if they were in this situation, what would Hirohito do? What would Tokugawa do?" Leaning closer, Nabiki said in a voice dripping menace, "What would Musashi do?"
"Apologize." He mumbled.
"What!"
"Apologize!"
"And make it good, or we're dead!"
Ranma arrived home, and ignored the useless fathers playing shogi in the living room. He floated into the kitchen, taking care to hum a little so as not to surprise Kasumi with his otherwise silent entrance through the wall.
She was preparing some of the items she'd make for dinner, and revising her shopping list to account for the greater appetites of her families guests when she noticed Ranma's humming entrance.
"Could you heat some water for me, and put it in my room so I can change back and get dressed?"
"Of course, Ranma. What happened in school?"
"I landed in the pool, and I had no way to get my clothes or any hot water. 'Sides I didn't want to streak around campus trying to get my pants. Especially with everyone in my class watching the pool with my clothes in it. So I called it a day, and came back here."
While Kasumi prepared a kettle to heat, Ranma noticed an oddity in her movements. "Kasumi, is your back or neck bothering you?"
"Why, yes. My shoulder's been bothering me, and I've been getting intermittent twinges in my shoulder blades when I lift something heavy."
"Well, if ya like, I can give you a back-rub while we wait for the water to boil. Just sit in a chair, and brace yourself with your arms against the table."
"Alright." Kasumi settles down, but nearly jumps when she felt Ranma touch her shoulder. She hadn't considered that Ranma couldn't touch clothes; therefore Ranma's hands touched her bare shoulder, ignoring her blouse and bra strap.
Almost immediately, she decided she was being silly. They weren't doing anything wrong. Besides, their fathers were in the next room, chaperoning. Kasumi was decently covered, and Ranma wasn't touching anything risque. So it couldn't matter if a young man was massaging her bare shoulders and back.
He was doing a good job of it too, if that pain, followed by relief, as he worked out a knot in the muscles was any indication. She just had to ignore the fact that this was the most intimate contact she'd had with another person in quite a while, and it was with her possible fiancee.
Of course she was still unaware that her clothes weren't only insubstantial to Ranma, but practically invisible as well. Ranma had no intention of doing anything naughty, and actually preferred working on her back, as it meant that he was unable to be distracted by her face, breasts, or bottom. Backs were safe! Except Kasumi had a lovely back, and a graceful neck; still it was much safer than thinking about the rest of her body.
But Ranma noticed shortly after touching Kasumi, that he could feel where Kasumi had aches and pains almost as well as if it were happening to him. It was as if he had two bodies, although the one from Kasumi felt duller or weaker than his own. Still, he could feel Kasumi's shoulder with his hands, and feel his hands as they touched her shoulders. He could feel the tabletop through Kasumi's hands, and the skirt brushing her legs.
He could feel the persistent itch of her bra as it rubbed the same spot on her back over and over. Idly, he scratched lightly where he felt the itch, and Kasumi thanked him without wondering how he knew where to scratch.
Shortly thereafter, Ranma had given her as thorough a massage possible while sticking to the upper back and neck, when the kettle signaled its readiness.
Kasumi thanked Ranma, as she added some cold water to the boiling water in the kettle to bring the temperature into a safe range. She did it without facing the invisible Ranma, so he wouldn't see her blush. Ranma didn't notice, as he was staring at his feet trying to understand what he had felt.
"Ranma, would it be easier for you if I put the hot water in your room in a bowl or a cup?"
"What?" Ranma jumped from his contemplation. "Oh, yes. A bowl would be easier. Thanks."
"Not at all."
Kuno summoned his manservant, Sasuke, because he needed his help. "Sasuke, today I have to attempt something that I have never needed to do before. It seems I have wronged someone."
"You have." Sasuke's voice contained quiet certainty.
"What was that?"
"I mean, you have?" This time, Sasuke managed the proper fawning level of surprised incredulity.
"Someone has been working behind the scenes to help me. Someone with hidden nobility, who has put aside his own advantage to thanklessly remove obstacles from my path, which I didn't even realize were there. And instead of clasping this paragon to my chest and singing his praises, I vilely insulted him."
"That's alright, master. It's my job to serve you."
"Not you! I'm talking about someone who had no reason to help me, and every reason not to. Someone who defies his family to refuse what I most desire. This noble son of a villainous father merely had to acquiesce in a moment of weakness and he would be married to the divine Akane Tendo, and through no fault of his own! Instead he refused on a matter of principle. Something which I might not have noticed, had our positions been reversed, until it would have been too late to do anything about it."
"Surely not!" Sasuke's voice contained the necessary conviction, even though he was unable to school his facial expressions in time. Luckily Kuno was in full rant and missed this.
"I'm afraid so. If I had suddenly found myself in front of the altar with Akane by my side, and a priest asked me if I'd take her as my bride, I'd have said 'I do' without concern over the niceties of a proper engagement! I blush to admit" Kuno didn't, "that he may have behaved better than I could have. Of course, he had just met Akane, and hadn't time to fall as far in love as I have. But still, I can not think of one other boy I know, who would have done as he did. Of all the boys I know, only he might I consider could be my peer."
"Oh dear," Sasuke thought to himself, "He's fixating on a boy this time. I hoped his homoerotic tendencies were just a phase he had gone through." Sasuke had incorrectly ascribed a very Freudian interpretation to Kuno's incessant waving of his bokken in public.
Unaware of his audience's lack of attention, Kuno continued his monologue. "But what did I do when I met this reflection of my own greatness, for he must feel the pain that I do to live with honor under the aegis of a perfidious father? I treated him as if he were merely one of the rabble that infest our school, and insulted him for the faults I mistakenly perceived in him through ascribing to him the motives of his classmates. An understandable mistake, of course, but still a blight on my noble self!"
"I'm sure the chemists have an ointment that will clear that up immediately." Sasuke chimed in, feeling he should contribute his part even though he hadn't heard a word Kuno had been saying until the very end; disturbed, as he was, by the mental image of Kuno wielding an, otherwise anatomically accurate, meter long vibrating dildo.
"I'm talking about the shame on our noble house!"
"Kodachi's a wonderful girl! She's just a little... high spirited!"
"She's a violent maniac! But we weren't discussing her!"
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(Posted Fri, 11 Mar 2005 05:27)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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