Upon learning of the unfortunate investments that Soun Tendo had made, and the foreclosure upon all his worldly assets that had occurred, he had suffered greatly. He had to make a magnificent entry to the market after all. Akane's gift of herself to him deserves no less than the full pageantry that he could afford.
For his great triumph and the full pomp of his circumstance, this was a cause to celebrate!
The porters carrying his sedan chair politely tuned out the muttering and ranting. As long as they were paid, who cared if it was yet another weird aristocrat?
As for the flower petals strewn in his path, well - his deranged sister would not miss a few from her garden.
Of course, you get what you pay for. That was one reason the band playing music was not playing a triumphal march as he'd ordered.
In fact, if one were familiar with certain types of music, one would recognize the tune being played as "Funeral March Of A Marionette" as played by the Furinkan High School Marching Band...
The effect of which was much annoyment from the other buyers, the sellers, and many of the slaves as the professional atmosphere was quite thoroughly punctured and trampled underfoot.
Tatewaki Kuno tried to say something. When he saw that he wasn't being heard (over the marching band) he began yelling. "I say, you there - peasant."
Naturally the manager was not happy to be addressed as such, nor happy about the disruption of usual business. Best to get this idiot out as quickly as possible. "Yes, sir?"
"I wish to purchase a slave girl," said Tatewaki Kuno.
"Because you can't get a girl in any other manner?" asked the manager in a normal voice.
"What?!" asked Kuno as the marching band began playing "Here She Comes Just A-Walking Down The Street." This was made even more annoying because Hirota had begun playing his bagpipe during this piece.
"Can you tell your musicians to stop?" asked the manager.
"Yes, she is named Akane Tendo," yelled back Kuno.
"Mariko Konjou?" asked the manager, checking his clipboard.
"What?!" asked Kuno, unable to hear much of anything over the increased volume and enthusiastic bagpiping of Hirota.
"What?!" asked the manager.
"I say, good musicians, pray stop thy lyric accomplishments until mine business be concluded," yelled Kuno.
"Okay, I'll charge your account," said the manager, glad to sell one nutcase to another.
"Musicians! Cease thy Tirpschorean... Tipscori... SHUT UP ALREADY!" yelled Tatewaki Kuno.
Silence, almost deafening after the sonic assault, made a blessed appearance.
"What did you say your name was, milord?" asked the manager, wanting among other things to make sure this went on the list of 'do not admit' individuals.
"I am the Shooting Star of the kendo world, the heir of samurai, and the manager of the family fortune in mine father's blessed absence, Tatewaki Kuno, age seventeen," intoned Kuno, counting on his family's prestige to impress this person.
"Kuno? Kuno. KUno? kuNO," said the manager, obviously trying to place the name.
"Kuno Pharmaceuticals?" suggested one of the palanquin bearers.
"Oh THAT Kuno," said the manager, nodding. Now he knew who to bill.
"As I was saying, the fair Akane Tendo-" began Tatewaki Kuno.
The manager quickly checked his clipboard. "Already sold."
"There must be some mistake," said Tatewaki Kuno. "The heavens themselves have made possible this purchase."
"The heavens should have made a deposit ahead of time then," said the manager. "She's already been sold. Full use along with her two sisters."
"WHAT?!" demanded Tatewaki. "HOW CAN THIS BE?"
"They came, they bought, they left," explained the manager.
"Such cannot be," insisted Tatewaki. "I am fated to be the owner of the fair Akane."
"That's between you and this 'Ranma Saotome' then," said the manager. "It's all perfectly legal."
"It must have been vile sorcery!" declared Kuno.
"No, actually it was prize money from a fight a few months ago, transferred between organizations," said the manager.
"Nay, it cannot be," insisted Kuno.
"Of course it can, happens all the time," insisted the manager. "By now, if young master Saotome is typical of boys his age - he's already enjoying the young lady's affections."
"What?" asked a suddenly faint Kuno.
"It's been almost an hour now, so I'd expect he was boffing the young wench, breaking her into her new role as it were," said the manager.
"Gak!" said a pale Kuno. "No. It surely cannot be."
"Considering how eager the young lady seemed to be," said the manager, sensing some payback opportunity, "I'd be very surprised if the two don't spend the night getting acquainted."
"This cannot be allowed! Which way didst they go?" declared Kuno.
"We getting overtime for this?" asked one of the palanquin bearers.
"They went that away," said the manager, pointing towards the exit.
"ONWARD!" demanded Kuno. "Find this Ranma Saotome!"
"Sounds like overtime to me," said the other palanquin bearer, smiling. He was a rental with a percentage of funds going to pay off his contract. Time and a half was therefore a very good thing.
The lawyer with the two nodded, making notes himself. Like the bearers, he was a rental from Samurai Servants corporation acting as scribe/advocate/legal expert. He just wished he could wear earplugs.
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(Posted Sat, 25 Jun 2005 19:18)
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