The tribal elder to whom the question was directed was sitting at a table in the backroom of the Nekohanten bent over and studying intently the yellow copy of the tournament entrance form Shampoo had brought home yesterday.
"Don't worry Shampoo, by Amazon law you could not possible have signed away your marriage with your husband the same way those other girls have signed away their engagements, so even if you should lose..." Cologne started to assure her, then stopped suddenly in mid-sentence.
The old woman paused to take out a magnifying glass and proceeded to take a closer look. Shampoo watched silently and held her breath in suspense.
"Or maybe not," the matriarch concluded with a resigned sigh. "It looks like someone read up on our tribal law: 'non-consumption', 'contested union', 'trial-by-combat' and 'quitclaim'. Very thorough. This must have been the middle Tendou daughter's work. And there is even a clause that has you agreeing to waive all past kiss-of-death vows and to forego from making any new ones during the tournament against any of the opponents you face."
"What does that mean?" Shampoo wanted to know.
"It means, Granddaughter," Cologne told her, "that should you lose this tournament you will have lost all claims on your husband in the eyes of Amazon law. In fact since you signed this he is not even your husband anymore until you win him back."
"This is very bad," Shampoo apologized. "Shampoo very sorry for not checking with Grandmother before signing."
The old woman stood up on her staff and hopped over to her granddaughter, addressing her earnestly.
"Yes, you should have cleared it with me before signing any legal documents," the elder admonished her. "Hasn't the incident with the salesman last month taught you anything?"
Shampoo thought about that question for a moment.
"Bonbori are good tool for renegotiation?" she offered. "Should Shampoo go back to Tendou dojo and hit things until get contract back?"
"No, that would be a very bad idea." Cologne tried to explain what should be patently obvious. "Not only might son-in... I mean Ranma take offense if you threatened his mother and his hosts, but I also strongly suspect that Nabiki has already taken precautions such as depositing copies of the contract you signed in secure places. Besides it would not be honorable. You are bound now by the contract and there is no going back, granddaughter."
"Then Shampoo will just have to win tournament and everything will be fine!" Shampoo declared confidently.
"Yes, you will," Cologne concurred angrily.
Turning away from her granddaughter, the elder hopped back onto her staff to the contract on the table.
"This might not be all that bad," she finally concluded a bit mollified after studying it some more. "It might actually work out to be a very good thing for us."
"Loser-rival-obstacle-girls won't interfere when Shampoo takes husband back to village and Ranma won't go all Phoenix-Mountain on tribe if Ranma mother tell Ranma to marry Shampoo," the young Amazon said, showing that she had understood at least the basic problems in enforcing Amazon laws on an unwilling and dangerously powerful subject.
"Yes, it will give us a chance to win Ranma's blood for the tribe without risking any unnecessary conflict," Cologne agreed. "And thanks to the wording of the contract honor will be satisfied whether you win the tournament or not."
"Shampoo won't lose. Shampoo stronger than crazy rose girl, cross-dressing spatula girl and perverted hammer girl," Shampoo declared confidently.
"Don't underestimate your opponents. You have been slacking off on your training while you have been chasing Ranma and we don't know who else you might have to face in the tournament. Genma seems to have the distressing habit of engaging his son to at least marginally competent fighters," Cologne told her.
Shampoo frowned as her grandmother reread a passage of the contract.
"It says here that in addition to those who have a prior claim a place in the tournament will also be given to anyone who can pay a rather large entrance fee. And there will be a qualification competition open to the general public for the remaining open slots," she summarized. "Who knows who else might buy or fight their way into the competition. Ranma attracts strong warriors."
"Shampoo is village champion! Shampoo will beat them all," the girl claimed.
Cologne hit her granddaughter over the head with her staff.
"And here I thought that our stay here in Nerima would have at least taught you about the dangers of overconfidence. You have seen Ranma go up against a number of fighters that would outclass you!" Cologne exclaimed.
Shampoo muttered something under her breath about most of them having been boys and thus being unable to fight in the tournament, but she did so quietly since she realized that having many males that were better fighters than her was not a good thing to bring up in defense of her fighting powers.
"We will use the time until the tournament to bring you up to more acceptable levels. I should never have allowed you to slack off on your training like this. Tomorrow we will start," Cologne announced. "In the meantime I will send a message to the village about this latest development. It would be good if could get some of your fellow warriors to try to also enter the competition."
"But why? Shampoo is best fighter in village and Ranma is Shampoo's husband!" Shampoo objected.
"I don't honestly expect any of them to beat you for the first prize, but it might be well to have some other Amazons win some of these consolation prizes alluded to in the contract," Cologne explained, not wanting to discourage her granddaughter by telling her that she also wanted to have a backup in place, just in case. "It will also be good for us beyond collecting Ranma's blood for the tribe. Without the kiss-of-death and its consequences hanging over the fights. We can expose an entire generation of future Amazon leaders to the fact that not all outsider women are weak. It will hopefully do us some good in the long term."
Shampoo just nodded. Grandmother was talking council politics again. Any minute now she would start ranting about 'dragging luddite isolationists kicking and screaming into next week' or something along those lines. Shampoo did not care. All she cared about was that she was going to win her husband's heart by beating up lots of pesky obstacles.
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(Posted Thu, 15 Dec 2005 20:22)
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