“Well, we were discussing your rival,” Tallman said in all seriousness.
Ranma nodded his head. That was it, Tallman was telling him about the other Mercenary that was supposedly down in this area on business as well. “Yeah, him...”
“Actually, it’s a her,” Tallman corrected the white-haired hunter.
“WHAT!?” Ranma gasped out. If it was a female, it could only mean one thing!
“Yay! Ranma has a chance to get laid!”
“Shit, here she goes again...”
“Shit is right...” Ranma thought, adding in his own two cents on the subject. Whenever mention of a woman was involved, Serenity would act up and try to get him on the subject of having sex, getting laid, or whatever.
Seeing the Mercenary rub the side off his head, Tallman was a little worried. “Is something wrong?”
Shaking his head, the White Tiger answered, “I’ll be fine. Just tell me what’s to know about this woman.”
“Yeah! We wanna know her preference in sexual orientation, her measurements, her turn-ons...”
Ranma twitched.
“She’s from up North like you, trained at some big fancy Mercenary Guild...” Joshua answered. “They say she’s one hell of a marksman and has all sorts of little neat ‘tricks’, especially when her partner is concerned...”
“OOH! Neat tricks with a partner, huh? KINKY! ME LIKES!”
“I don’t think he means it like THAT you pervert!”
Raising an eyebrow to that, while otherwise staying poker-faced for the most part to what his ‘silent’ partners were arguing about, Ranma asked Tallman, “And just what kind of tricks would they be using?”
Shrugging his shoulders, all the owner of the bar could answer was, “Just that. What they do is unknown, but they do a damn good job with efficiently taking out the Dark Ones.”
“If that’s the case...” Ranma started slowly, before looking Tallman directly in the eye. “Why send word for me?”
“Simple,” Tallman said. “In case word didn’t get to them in time, or... Well, it’s cheaper to pay just ONE mercenary instead of TWO mercenaries...”
“Should’a known...” Ranma said in annoyance. “Just for that, I’m going to ask for another stipulation...”
Tallman winced. Crap, these Mercenaries really could be mercenary at times. “And that is?”
“I want to add a new piece of equipment to the list of things to pay me with,” Ranma said seriously. “Consider it an up-front incentive to go in case these aren’t just Kuei...”
“And what is it you want?” The older man asked the white-haired youth with the scar on his face.
“A gun,” Ranma answered. “A good one. And more than a few shots of ammunition.”
Nodding his head without hesitation, Tallman answered, “We can do that. But I’m surprised you want a gun...”
“Same here. I thought we were more than enough...”
“I have to agree with Raz-”
“RAZIEL!”
“Fine, Raziel... But as I was saying, I agree. Why do you need a simple gun when you’ve already got us, Ranma?”
“...If it’s so he can have something to fight enemies with that won’t annoy the hell out of him, I would completely understand.”
Ranma’s answer was a simple one. “It’s an insult to my weapon’s capability to waste it’s power on killing roaming hordes of bandits that come about from time-to-time, thinking me an easy score as I travel. It would be nice just to pick them off from a distance.”
“But I LIKE feasting on their pathetic human souls...”
“And you wonder why people would think YOU’RE a Dark One...”
“Well, Sor-RY, but the world doesn’t revolve around sex, you stupid whore!”
“Of course you’d say that, you nasty, dark-willed soul-sucker!”
“Well, at least I’m not a fucking slut of a cock-sucker!”
“Soul-Sucker!”
“Cock-Sucker!”
“Soul-Sucker!”
“Cock-Sucker!”
“SOUL-SUCKER!”
“COCK-SUCKER!
“SHUT UP!!!” Ranma shouted, his bellow reverberating through the building, making Tallman nearly fall from his seat.
“Buh-but I didn’t say anything!” Tallman said, insulted.
Groaning, Ranma’s upper torso fell forward, face planting onto the table-top.
“Now look at what you did! Now someone ELSE thinks Ranma’s insane!”
“So what else is new?”
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(Posted Sat, 31 Dec 2005 19:10)
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