The trio slowly made their way to school, the excitement of last night carrying over enough to get them to leave early. Add to the fact Ranma was able to sleep without “the Snoring Panda”, and he was well rested. He didn’t even end up with a cold bath that morning courtesy of Panda Air or Akane Morning Wakeup Calls.
Now while the sight of Nabiki walking with them wasn’t all that odd, the fact that Ranma and Akane were now spotting brown spotted hair and pointed ears was.
“I can’t believe you did that,” grumbled Akane.
“Hey, it ain’t my fault,” said Ranma. “I didn’t mean to bite Kasumi when she was measuring me, but she startled me with where she put her hands.”
“Yeah, right. Then why is she a were-cheetah now?”
“Not like I wanted to turn her into one,” said Ranma.
“Right; just like you didn’t want to turn me into one.”
Nabiki rubbed her temples. Normally, she enjoyed the casual display of affections between the two—Ranma would insult Akane and Akane would pound Ranma, you know, the usual—but she was not in a good position at the moment. Yesterday, she discovered Goddesses were real, the major pantheons seemed to exist, and Ranma was going to be rich...
And for some reason, the Goddess of Japan that was supposed to be a model of the traditional woman was now a feminist and currently snoring loudly from her father’s room.
Suffice to say, Nabiki was hoping that her father was not in that room. She was not certain she could stand having a Goddess for a step-mother. Talk about not living up to your parents’ example.
“Why would I want to turn an uncute tomboy like you into a were-cheetah?” he yelled.
Before Akane could go for the “Ranma-no-baka” punt of the day, Nabiki stepped in. “No fighting, you two.”
“But Nabiki...”
“I mean it,” said Nabiki, “or do want Bastet-sama to show up and do to you whatever she did to Kuno?”
Akane gulped.
“And Ranma, they talked to you about growing up.”
Ranma lowered his head. “I didn’t mean ta.”
Sighing, Nabiki rubbed her temples again. “Akane, Kasumi may have done it on purpose, did you ever think of that?”
Akane stared at her, as if Nabiki had just said the world was flat and Kuno was really Kami-sama himself.
Nabiki chuckled a bit. “Just because you suppress your urges, don’t assume everyone else does as well. I know for a fact Kasumi really likes the whole were-idea.”
“Kasumi? Our Kasumi? Our sister Kasumi?”
“Yes already,” mumbled Nabiki.
Ranma scratched the back of his head. “I wonder why Bastet said that I could control who I bit if everyone I bite ends up changing, whether I want them to or not?”
“Grr...”
“Down, Akane, or end up like Kuno-baby,” said Nabiki. Seeing her sister was chastised enough, Nabiki put forth a theory. “Remember; Bastet-sama said that he would mentally okay it for any of his fiancées.”
“Oh; so you want to be engaged to Kasumi now, is it?”
WHACK!
Akane held her cheek. “N-N-Nabiki?”
Taking a deep breath, Nabiki tried to calm herself. “I decided if you can knock Ranma around for making you angry, I can do it to you when you get me angry.
“Now as I was trying to say before you went rabid; I think Bastet-sama put a little shift in Ranma’s control, so that if he bites anyone he is engaged to, they’ll be changed. And since the Tendo agreement calls for one of us to marry Ranma, then if he bites any of us, we’ll be sporting fur in a few hours.”
Ranma blinked. “So if I end up biting you, Kodachi, Shampoo, or Ucchan; they’ll become were-cheetahs?”
“Got it in one, Ranma-baby,” said Nabiki. “And while I think it would be neat, I’d rather hold off on changing myself for a bit. Maybe after school?”
“Um ... okay.”
Turning back to her sister, who was now slightly pale in shock and still holding her cheek, Nabiki moved to get her attention again.
WHACK!
“What the hell was that for?” yelled Akane.
“To get your attention.” Hey; that was kind of nice. I wonder if that's why Akane does it; stress relief?
Akane grumbled, now rubbing her other cheek.
“Come now, little sister; did you think that Ranma would just bite you, and you’d live happily ever after?”
“Why do I care who that jerk bites?”
WHACK!
“HEY!”
Nabiki shrugged. “I can be mature enough to admit my feelings to myself. And calling Ranma a jerk won’t win you any points with him.”
“Like I care who he marries.”
Nabiki shrugged. “Good, then there’s less competition for the rest of us. Hell, I know of at least seven other girls in our school who would love a chance to at least date Ranma.”
“WHAT?” yelled the two.
“Really now, you two seem to underestimate your own value. Flawed marriage agreements and ridiculous laws aside, Ranma is very popular in either form, and not just to the opposite gender of those forms.”
Ranma paled a bit. Not that he had anything against homosexuals. But he had enough trouble with guys hitting on him in his girl form. He didn’t need them hitting on his guy form as well.
“All things equal, Akane, you either need to be honest with your feelings and admit them to Ranma, or get out of the game and allow the rest of us to play. That is the adult thing to do. This hitting him because he calls you names is so grade school.”
Akane looked about ready to cry, when Nabiki stopped it.
WHACK!
“WOULD YOU QUIT SLAPPING ME!”
“Then quit acting like a baby, little sister,” said Nabiki.
“Um, Nabiki,” stumbled Ranma, “not that I ain’t grateful for your help, but why the change?”
Nabiki looked at him with surprise. “We have three Kami visiting our house in less than a day and you’re asking me what’s with my change in personality?”
“Oh,” said Ranma.
“Yeah; learning of the truth kind of changes your outlook on things,” said Nabiki.
She turned back to her sister, giving her the patented Ice Queen glare. “Just like him, little sister, you’re going to have to learn to use your brain. And that includes keeping quiet about being what you now are. Unless of course you want the same people that wiped out the were-cheetah to come back and after you.”
Akane gulped. “They wouldn’t, would they?”
“In a heart beat,” said Nabiki. “Hatred like that doesn’t disappear after one generation. Why else do you think the Goddesses want Ranma to learn magic? These people use it and have no problem with killing innocents to get what they want. They’ll go through any of the fiancées, trick Ranma’s rivals, even use people like me and Kasumi to get to him. Understand? That means we need training in both magic and fighting, and we can’t act like spoiled princesses every time Ranma says something we don’t like, or because he bites someone you don’t want bitten.”
“Speaking of bites, has anyone seem Ryoga?” asked Ranma. He had wanted to change the Lost Boy back and bite him, hoping it would stop the fanged boy from constantly showing up and attacking him for no good reason, but the Lost Boy had disappeared right from Akane’s lap.
“Can’t wait to see how well you fare against a werewolf, huh?” asked Nabiki, smiling.
Ranma nodded. “That and I think the porker deserves to have that curse cured.”
“Do you think the Amazons will be okay with ... us?” said Akane. “I mean, we sound more like we’d fit in better with the Musk.”
Nabiki shrugged. “I doubt they’ll attack us. If anything, I figure Ranma might be able to get some more moves out of Cologne in exchange for biting some Amazons. If anyone knows about them in this world, it would be them.”
Ranma nodded. “Just stay close to me at lunch, in case they don’t like us.”
As they began to walk back, Nabiki looked over at Ranma, back to walking along the fence. “Going to bite Ukyo?”
Ranma shrugged. “Up ta her, really. I’d really rather not bite anyone else without their permission, especially fiancées.”
Nabiki smiled. “Good plan.”
“I wonder if biting Ms. Hinako might cure her,” said Ranma, scratching his head.
Akane giggled a bit. “I’m sure Daddy would like that.”
It was supposed to be a simple assignment from Lord Gowthrain. They were supposed to look around Tokyo for sources of magic or other types of great power and report back.
And after barely avoiding being struck with a large pink heart in Juuban, attacked by aliens, running from some cat-girl named Nuku Nuku; they were bruised, tired, and smelled like the fumes of a downed attack helicopter.
“Like, can we find some place to sleep?” asked Moisha.
“Yeah,” said Romeo. “I’m hungry.”
“Suck it up you @&#% morons,” said Lydia. “Besides, we’re also supposed to check out this *&#$@ moron named Ranma. He’s supposed to be some big and powerful fighter here.”
“Like that were-cheetah’s hot mom?” asked Romeo.
“Shaw, I don’t want to get killed by someone like that,” said Moisha. “Can’t we at least get cleaned up and get some food first?”
“Oh; are you looking for Ranma-kun?”
The three slowly looked at the open gate, looking at a large were-cheetah female in a house dress, broom in hand, peering at them.
Now while they didn’t immediately fall prey to the Glare of Doom—which applied to were-cheetahs created by Iceron and not those of Bastet’s template—they found themselves dealing with another problem of the ward.
“SWEETO!” came the cry, as Happosai fell onto his old tricks, and spotted a girl before Kasumi who perhaps had a larger chest than Ranma-chan.
“LIKE; IT’S AN ALIEN!”
“OH ^#%#^! DON’T LET IT PUT A ^^#$@^ EGG IN YOUR CHEST!”
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(Posted Sun, 06 Aug 2006 02:15)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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