[Episode 170007] [Episode 170007]There comes a time in every journey when those on it wonder if they’re going the right way. Most often, this is a philosophical representation of the uncertainty that fills their everyday lives, compounded by the inherent doubt as to the validity of their own being.
In Tirga and Sheila’s case, however, they just weren’t sure where the hell they were.
“No, that’s near a river! Do you see any rivers in the middle of this huge freaking desert?!”
“Oh, excuse me, oh mistress of navigation! I forgot that you know all about this stuff! Remind me, who was it that was holding the map upside-down?”
“That was a mistake anyone could have made! It was dark and the night sky is different here than it is back home!”
“And in the Craggmore Mountains?”
Sheila threw her hands up in exasperation. “I knew you would go there! One time I get a little lost, and I never hear the end of it!”
“A little lost?! Sheila, you landed smack dab in the middle of an Undead Realm invasion force! How you managed to stumble into an open portal without realizing it is beyond me!”
“And what about you?!” Sheila shot back, now getting in Tirga’s face. “Remember when our excursion into The Misty Deep took an ‘accidental’ right turn directly into Amazon Breeder territory?! Poor Gar barely got out alive when you blamed the desecration of their sacred shrine on him!”
“He barely got out alive?! Those psycho chicks tied me to a stake and tried to burn me into a cinder! I only got out because the girl I seduced felt bad she hadn’t warned me we were doing it in their goddesses’ temple!”
Sheila became very calm all of a sudden, but her eyebrow began to twitch ever so slightly. “You said they thought you peed out behind that temple, not nailed a girl in it.”
There are looks one’s significant other gives them that need no explanation. After being with her for long enough, Tirga had learned to read Sheila well. Though Sheila appeared furious, her look was one of deep disappointment, not true anger. Humbled, Tirga said, “Sheila, I-”
“You nearly got my brother killed because you couldn’t control your hormones, I understand that,” Sheila said with preternatural calm. “I also understand that you are not the same person you were then. But when we got married, we promised there would be no secrets between us, and I specifically asked you about that incident.” She leaned down until she was hovering directly in Tirga’s face. “You lied to me.”
Now sweating from something having nothing to do with the heat, Tirga tried again to appease his wife. “Sheila… I’m sorry. That wasn’t something I was proud of, and-”
Sheila cut him off, loosing all measure of calm. “Not proud of?! When had you not bragged about bagging a new ‘conquest’?! Amber, Grace, Violet, Cindy! Those names sound familiar?! They should, because they were magically tattooed into your butt after you made it with all of them at once! I had to hear about all the details the next morning over breakfast! So tell me, husband mine, why was this one so different?!”
Tirga sighed, and looked off into the distance for a moment. Sheila was about to demand an answer when one was provided for her. “Because she got pregnant.”
Sheila jerked back as though slapped. Her mind was spinning over what she had just heard. Tirga got a woman pregnant and he hadn’t told her? How many other things had he done without telling her about? Suddenly, just lying about a sexual escapade seemed very small compared to this.
He continued unbidden. “She came to me a couple months after to tell me about it. At first, I thought she had to be kidding me. Wasn’t the first time someone had claimed that, and it’s almost impossible for a werecat and a human produce offspring the first time, right? Takes years of trying for any real chance. That’s why I spread it around so much. Little to no chance of actual repercussions. That’s how I wanted it to stay.”
“She wasn’t kidding, of course. Turned out the Temple was one of fertility, and it was being prepared for a joining that very day, that’s what the big deal was all about.” Tirga turned back to Sheila, who was still stunned into silence. “She gave me a choice: come back and raise the child with her, or renounce all claims to it.”
He lowered his head in shame. “I ran.”
Shock prevented Sheila from speaking until then, but righteous female anger spurred her on again. “You ran?! You left your child behind with it’s mother and took off?! What the hell is wrong with you?! What kind of man leaves his unborn child and pregnant girlfriend behind?! I knew you were a playboy, but this is-”
”Because I loved you,” Tirga said softly.
Sheila’s berating of her husband ground to an abrupt halt when she heard that over her shouting. “What?”
Tirga’s head came back up and he met Sheila’s gaze with unflinching steadiness. “I realized it on the way back to Seer’s Hamlet from the Amazon village. Although you were mad at me for blaming everything on Gar, you took care of me as well. By the end of the trip, you were joking about it, like it wasn’t a big deal; ‘just more of the same when Tirga’s around’. And… it wasn’t even mean-spirited. You were everything I wanted then: Smart, sexy when you wanted to be, understanding and always just… nice. After everything I put you through when I knew you were interested in me, you never really struck back at me, even though nobody would have blamed you.”
Sheila put a hand over her mouth in wide-eyed surprise. “That’s why you married me,” she breathed. “It all started from there: you being nice to me, asking me out, the wedding… why… why didn’t…”
“Why didn’t I tell you?” Tirga finished for her. Sheila nodded in response. “Because I was afraid. Even after all of what I’d done, showing you, and everyone, how I’d changed, I was afraid that if you learned I had ran out on one kid already, you’d never consider being with me. Since then… well, we had children of our own and I stuck around for all of it. I couldn’t live with her because I knew I could only live with you.”
Having the sudden need to sit down for all this, Sheila plopped down in the sand with a stunned expression on her face. All of this was a bit much to take in one sitting. This would have to come out when they were so deep in the middle of nowhere there was no one else to talk to, of course. Her brain started to grind away at what Tirga had just told her. One, they had gotten together because of a one-night stand with another girl, who had gotten pregnant as a result. Two, he left the other girl and the child in the lurch because, as he said, he was in love with her. Three, all this was coming out as they were on the trail of a child they had both abandoned, no matter the reasons for doing so.
To Sheila, the irony was killing her. The only thing that would make this situation complete was the jackass off of that old TV program to jump out and tell her that she’d been ‘Punked’.
Slowly, she began to pull herself together. Although this revelation was shocking, nothing had really changed, had it? Tirga was still the same guy he’d been since his change, she was still the same person she’d always been, and they needed to find the child they had together. That was what they were here for. There wasn’t really anything she could kapowie him for, either. If he had gone with the other girl, they would have never had their children. Sheila was less than pleased Tirga finally got the impulse to be with her because he knocked someone up, but it had only been a matter of time until that happened anyway.
Tirga looked down at his wife with some worry. She had fairly slumped to the ground in the wake of his confession, and he wasn’t sure how she was going to take it. There was far too much at stake to have this come in the way of their journey, and he began to wonder about the wisdom of telling her at all. “Honey? …Sheila? You ok?”
Throwing off the last of her self-doubt concerning the situation, Sheila nodded and got back to her feet. “Yeah. Just going over a few things in my mind.”
“And?” Tirga asked hopefully.
“No kapowies,” Sheila replied with a toothy grin. “For now, at least. I think you and I need to have a serious talk about what we’re going to do when we get back. You need to see if she’ll let you see your child.”
Tirga sighed. “You’re kidding, right? This is an Amazon we’re talking about here- a Breeder, no less. Once I’m out of the picture, the kid’s hers permanently. And do you really think she’s going to let me anywhere near the kid after I took off like that? I’d be lucky if she didn’t fillet me on sight. You know how Breeders hold grudges.”
“Be that as it may, you’ll be kicking yourself in your old age if you don’t try. Besides, he, or she, has probably moved away from his mom by now. What would the kid be now, twenty-one? Twenty-two?”
“Twenty-two,” Tirga confirmed. “At least, if she delivered when she thought she was going to. And you know she did.”
“You know how Breeders are,” the two intoned together.
“Feel better after getting that off your chest?” Sheila asked as they continued northward.
“Oh yeah. Now, let me tell you about all the other illegitimate children I have…”
Sheila took his jab at her insecurities in stride, and responded, “Ok, but only after I tell you about my last boyfriend’s package. It was huge! Way bigger than yours, and he could make it do tricks, too…”
“Sheila…” Tirga growled as he advanced on his wife to make her shut up.
As before, they took off over the hot desert sands, only this time, Sheila led Tirga on the merry chase. “It was like a Rock Asp! He could use it as a kickstand! I once saw him use it to club an ogre into submission!”
“DIE!!!”
See other episodes by lil bunny MoFo
(Posted Fri, 18 Aug 2006 06:37)
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