"So you want to be married to all those girls ? No problem !" Mihoshi raised a hand and an explosion of multicolored light burst out, blinding Shinji. When he recovered his sight, he saw Mihoshi smile at him and say "Your wish is granted, Master. Now I must leave and find another, have fun !"
The blonde policewoman turned genie waved at him and turned back into smoke which was swallowed by the lamp. The magical item then disappeared with a loud pop.
Shinji was sitting on the pavement, utterly confused. A minute later, he stood up and left. It was just some kind of prank, he thought. No one would give a wish to Shinji Ikari, he was simply too pathetic. No way the girls whose names he mentioned would love even less marry a wheeny loser like him.
Besides, polygamy was illegal, right ? Just a teenage fantasy... Whoever sent Mihoshi after him must be laughing his ass off at his gullibility.
"The third child is leaving the encounter site. Apparently it was just a well-equiped prankster. Over" The nameless section-2 agent watching over Shinji today switched off his radio and resumed his surveillance. *He's heading to his appartment. Captain Katsuragi is off-duty, if I remember correctly, lucky bastard...* How a scrawny kid like him could end up married to five attractive girls and women, he'll never know.
*****
In order to grant Shinji's wish, Mihoshi had altered the recent history of the Evangelion world. Just a minor fudge, really...
Instead of the room of Gauff being empty of souls, the cause for the global birth rate problem after second impact was revealed to be male sterility provoked by the radiations emitted by the first angel when he was forcefully reverted to embryo state. Now all men born bafore second impact and nine out of ten born after it were unable to have children.
Since SEELE was working on instrumentality, this problem would soon become moot so they didn't intervene on how the World handled this crisis. To no one's surprise, polygamy was legalized, for fertile males, that is. Age of consent was lowered since all the eligible males were barely past puberty.
After the battle with Sachiel, tests revealed that Shinji's 'gun' was loaded and ready.
The first to marry him had been Misato. They were drinking one night (Misato had succeeded in making him drink beer, how she did it is now knowledge lost to us), she told Shinji, in her drunken haze, that he was the closest thing to a motherhood experience she'll ever get. He had been a bit tipsy himself and answered jokingly he could be the father of her children since the doctors told him he was fertile. A drunken proposal and a mad drive to the city office later, they had woken up in the same bed married and Shinji no longer a virgin.
Shinji had been so sweet, supportive and just plain nice that Misato fell in love with him. Not that she could leave so easily, divorcing from a fertile man was next to impossible legally now.
Gendo had been amused by the whole thing (even if he didn't show it). Now he had another way to put pressure on his son at his disposal. He was less amused when Ritsuko Akagi and Maya Ibuki joined the Ikari family. Maya wanted children and Shinji was a decent boy, they could get to it after the war. No one knew however what was in the good doctor Akagi's mind when she injected the third child with a hormone shot strong enough for a bull (she claimed it had been an accident). After the wild ride, Shinji took his responsibilities like the good and honest boy he was and married his third wife.
As for Rei Ayanami, the incident at her appartment when Shinji brought the first child her new ID card degenerated. she had been curious about sex since she had seen the third child's synch ratio skyrocket thanks to the morale-boosting effects of the affections given to him. Admitting the experience was indeed pleasurable and that she wanted to do it again, she married Shinji too, he had said that sex should be between husband and wife.
Shinji had also a fifth wife who was...
See other episodes by Jamil Nate
(Posted Fri, 20 Dec 2002 22:22)
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