Despite what one might think, Usagi Tsukino was actually quite good at math. Not the literal kind with all of the big, scary numbers where you had to do long division — Usagi didn’t really about that kind, as in her view, calculators had rendered that kind of math irrelevant. (Plus, if she was ever in a pinch, she could just ask Ami.) No, her specialty lay in the figurative kind of math, where one added up all of the parts of a given situation and came out with an overall accurate assessment of what was going on, which in turn allowed her to make informed decisions about which course of action to take. It was from her skill at this kind of math that she derived the leadership abilities that made her so capable as Sailor Moon, and would make her a capable head of state as Neo-Queen Serenity once Crystal Tokyo was established.
Unfortunately, when Usagi first presented this grand argument to Luna, the Mooncat’s response had been rather blunt: “Nice try. Now finish your algebra homework.”
However, the fact that Usagi had, at the time, been primarily motivated by her desire to go to a movie with Mamoru did not make certain elements of her reasoning any less true; indeed, she truly could be adept at piecing together various bits of information when she wanted to.
Case in point: When Usagi and Naru entered into the line to buy their tickets for the 7 o’clock showing of Amazon Tree Frogs on a Spaceship, the odango’ed teenager didn’t really have anything on her mind except the prospect of watching Samuel L. Jackson save a crew of hapless space travelers from hordes of colorful-but-deadly poison dart frogs. That, however, changed when she noticed Ranma’s distinctive profile out of the corner of her eye, talking to a pair of older teenagers. Naturally, given her extroverted personality, the social math problem went like this:
Ranma has friends + Ranma is my friend = New friends! ^_^ (Yes, she actually thought the emoticon.)
Usagi loved making new friends. One could never have too many friends. Sure, occasionally, these new friends turned out to be monsters or alien invaders, but for the most part, her track record as far as friendship went was pretty good. She was excited; all she needed to do was get Ranma’s attention and then….
And then she saw the three of them splitting up, with the two of them head towards the line. Usagi suddenly realized that she’d forgotten something important.
Ranma has friends + Ranma is my friend – Ranma’s lack of social skills = No introductions = No new friends <_>
Fortunately, a solution presented itself very quickly:
(Ranma has friends + Ranma is my friend – Ranma’s lack of social skills + my endearing personality) ÷ possibility for social embarrassment × chance that they’re nice people = Introduce yourself, girl!
“Naru, would mind holding my place in line for a second? I need to take care of something.”
“Sure thing, Usagi.”
“Sir, Naru’s been separated from her friend — should we follow her?”
“No…” check replied, “we’re stretched thin as it is with half the squadron out looking for Llobewu. Where the hell is he?”
There are few things in existance more irritating that having to listen to an idiot sing his own (undeserved) praises.
One of those things is hearing that idiot singing those praises to the tune of “I Want Candy” by Bow Wow Wow.
“Who’s the coolest guy around? Doo! Ba-doot-doo!
Beats his enemies to the ground? Doo! Ba-doot-doo!
Who’ll be kicking ass tonight? Doo! Ba-doot-doo!
And getting a raise from Anthracite? Doo! Ba-doot-doo!
Oh, Iiiiiii’m so awe-some! Doo! Ba-doot-doo!
Iiiiiii’m so awe-some! Doo! Ba-doot-doo!”
As Llobewu launched into the song’s surf-rock guitar solo for the twenty-seventh time, the group of ninjamarketers standing outside his home looked distinctly nonplussed.
“How long has he been grooming himself in there?”
“About thirty minutes; though when I asked, he said he needed at least forty-five in order to be ready.”
“Ugh. If he knew he’d take this long, why didn’t he do this ahead of time?!”
With just a hint of nervousness, the teenager walked to the back of the line to where the couple. “Um, excuse me, but were you just talking to Ranma Meioh?”
Akane looked warily at the girl with the rather odd hairstyle — could this be one of Kuno’s tricks? “Uh, yes, as a matter of fact, we were.”
“So you’re friends of his?”
“Well, yes…”
“That’s wonderful! So am I! Well, actually, I only recently became his friend, but I’ve been a friend of Setsuna for quite a while now.”
“Wait… you know Setsuna?”
“Uh huh.”
“Hang on a second… blonde… a pair of floor-length ponytails… effervescent personality… you wouldn’t be Usagi Tsukino, would you?”
“Yes! That’s right! Did she tell you about me?”
“No, not really — she rarely discussed what she did in Juuban with me and my sisters. I got your description from your cousin, Chibi-Usa. She’s staying with us.”
“Wait, then you must be…”
“Akane Tendo.”
“Oh, wow! It’s a pleasure to finally meet Nabiki’s sister!”
Akane wasn’t exactly sure how this girl would know he older sister, but she figured it had to have something to do with whatever it was that Setsuna kept paying Nabiki to do. “Um, thank you.”
“So, what brings you to Juuban?”
“Oh We’re on— I’m on a date with my friend Hikaru here.”
“Oh, that’s nice. Why are we whispering?”
“Because I don’t want him to be turned into mincemeat by an idiotic kendo player.”
“Oh, right. Kuno. Nabiki told us about him.
“Us?”
“Me and my friends. Um, look, you mind if we—” Usagi stopped, cleared her throat, and restarted her question: “Do you mind if we stop whispering? It’s not easy to hear you over this crowd noise.”
“Oh, alright. Just be careful what you say.”
“Got it. So — Hikaru, was it? — how have you liked… um, how have you liked Juuban so far?”
Gosunkugi had to blush — he was actually in a conversation with not one but two pretty girls who were calling him by his given name. “Uh, it’s been really nice.”
“That’s good. I take it you’re not a talkative person?”
“Um, not really.”
“That’s okay. Some of my best friends don’t really like talking that much — that’s why I have to make up for them!” she added with a broad smile. “So, seeing a movie?”
“It’d be kind of silly to wait in line at a movie theater if we weren’t.”
“Which movie?”
“Amazon Tree Frogs on a Spaceship.”
“What a coincidence! That’s the same one I’m seeing with my friend Naru (she’s holding my place in line). Tell you what, why don’t we meet up after the movie to talk some more?”
“Uh, sure, why not? You don’t mind, do you, Hikaru?”
“Not really.”
“Great! I’ll meet you in front of the Crown Arcade, okay?”
“Okay.”
As Usagi walked back to where Naru was standing, she was very happy — so much so, that she started singing a little song:
“Iiiiiii’ve got new friends! Doo! Ba-doot-doo!
Iiiiiii’ve got new friends! Doo! Ba-doot-doo!” ^_^
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(Posted Wed, 15 Nov 2006 02:18)
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