"I vowed I would do whatever you need me to do, My Love." Akane put a hand above her breast. It nearly broke Akane's heart to say those words. But it eased her loss to know that her Doctor would be hers...at long last; now and forever. She would learn to tolerate Futana being a man...if that's what she wanted.
Or meant? "Dr. Futana what did you mean by, "Before I know if I can begin my journey into accepting myself as a woman, I need to be a man"?"
"In the months since my...conversion to this gender, I have learned a certain amount of acceptance of my current sex.” The woman adjusted her gi. “As Tofu may have told you, there are certain risks to my attempting to become a male. Beyond the physical ones, if I do attempt it, what peace I've gained is put at risk. If I fail, I risk resenting a body that is not at fault, as it is healthy and beautiful.
"Besides, life is less complicated for my brother without there being a double of him around to confuse matters."
"But, Doctor, then why put yourself through knowing what it's like to have sex as a man, again!?" Akane was nearly pleading for her not to.
"My largest problem with being female is the intimacy. I cannot find it in me to find men sexually attractive. And the times that I have tried to love a woman, I found it pleasurable but unsatisfying. “
“But you really didn’t love those woman, did you? If you do have a woman who can return your love, then anything is possible!” Akane, of course, meant herself to be “a woman”.
“Any satisfaction would be on a strictly spiritual level. On a baser level, I could find a yearning for something I can no longer deliver.” She smiled, now. “That craving could be, perhaps, lessened, if I could periodically experience sex as a male. Perhaps, I could even discover that my need to love like a male is not as great as I imagine; I could then concentrate on fully accepting love as a woman.”
“...Or you could find that your need is so great that you have to risk the experiment that could make you a man,” Akane said in a subdued voice. Futana’s silence confirmed the truth of what she had said.
Akane pulled her shoulders back and held up her chin. "I vowed I would do whatever you need me to do. Someone truly in love is supposed to think of her lover’s needs, first, right?”
Before any more doubts could enter into the situation, Futana began to explain the Extended Family Plane technique: “You are not ready to enter through my mind. You would be surrounded by one that is more male than female; full of conflicts. But I promised I would show you a special technique that could win you a sparring match with Ranma. Follow me:
“Get into the Stance, grounding yourself firmly. Now you raise your hands as you normally do as you prepare for a contest. Only, instead of fists... .” Futana’s fingers were placed in yoga’s mudra, which some might think were okay signs. “Distract Ranma or wait until the last minute, and he may not become aware of that you are not making fists: Which are what his training has him expecting to see.
“Now, focus your energies, as your training has taught you.” Akane did attempt to focus, though she had never been very good at it; and even worse since Ranma had arrived in her life. “When you have, place the fingers of your left hand one-on-top-of-the-other...that’s right, little finger on top of the pinkie and that resting on the middle. You have made a “funnel” which you can use to collect the energies of the other person.”
Now Akane understood what Dr. Futana had done before! “And when you put the fingers of your right hand UNDER the next one, you are making a reverse funnel to aim your own energy back at your opponent!”
“Not quite, Dear Akane,” the Doctor said, slowly waving her hands about almost as a martial does when looking for an opening. She, though, brought both hands near her eyes. “See how I am looking at your energies? I am searching for something that I can identify with. Once I’ve read something we can share that I think can link us, I can ride your energy and channel it to...”
(Posted Mon, 27 Nov 2006 19:54)
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