After being punched in the face by an overgrown, humanoid monkey-girl, flying through half of the Juuban district and impacting within a solid brick wall, officer Leon McNichol couldn't do much more than just lying on the ground for a long time, thinking about life and its meaning...
After some time, his female partner came running. "Leon, I... What the heck? Leon, are you drunk? I'd hate to report this to the chief, you know..."
Slowly, Leon's senses came back to him. "Ow... ow..." he muttered. "Stupid monkey-girl..."
Nene gritted her teeth. "WHAT DID YOU CALL ME??"
"No, not you..." Leon babbled almost unintelligibly. "It was a big, hairy monkey... up in the tree..."
Sadly, the only words Nene could understand were 'big', 'hairy', 'monkey' and 'tree'.
BANG! "Don't EVER call me..." BANG! "A hairy monkey..." BANG! "AGAIN!!" BANG!
As Nene dropped her mallet, Leon just twitched and stared up to the sky. Could this day get any worse?
----
"Hotaru-chan, what are you thinking about?"
Hotaru pondered. "I dunno, Setsuna-mama... I just wondered why you don't use your powers to let us go back in time before the animals get possessed by the daimon eggs."
Setsuna shook her head. "Hotaru, Hotaru... you still have a lot to learn about a Senshi's responsibilities... ESPECIALLY about those of my functions as the guardian of time."
"Well, what's your plan?" the cute Senshi of destruction asked curiously.
Setsuna smiled down at her. "Watch closely and learn, Hotaru-chan..."
----
Hotaru stuck her head out of the bushes in which she was hiding... and face-faulted when realizing what Setsuna's ingenious plan consisted of.
Sailor Pluto smirked as she looked down at the lonely banana lying on the pavement. Behind the corner of a house, she waited with her trusty Garnet Rod.
"I'm so clever..." she chuckled. "Every monkey loves bananas. And once our furry friend comes to pick it up, a swift bonk on her head should make her fall asleep..."
She waited for several minutes... and indeed, the monkey came.
But things didn't quite work out as the Senshi of time had predicted.
Setsuna noticed that something was amiss as soon as her feet left the ground. Confused, she turned her head... and looked right into the angry face of a 3-meter-monkey-daimon.
"I don't like it if someone plans to knock me out..." Akane grumbled dangerously while lifting Setsuna up into the air by her rod.
Setsuna smiled innocently. "He, he... sorry?"
----
Hotaru looked up at the lamp post from which Setsuna was dangling, bound to it with her very own Garnet Rod, which was wrapped nicely around her waist.
"I didn't know anyone would be strong enough to bend your rod this way..." Hotaru muttered.
"Don't just stand there!" Setsuna said in irritation. "Get me down!"
----
Misae Nohara grimaced as she saw the slimy little toad sitting on the window sill. "Shin-chan... did you bring home animals again?" she muttered. "If they only weren't that... slimy all the time."
She went downstairs into the living room, where her husband was sitting and reading the newspaper. "Hiroshi, there's a disgusting little animal sitting on the window sill upstairs... get rid of it!"
Hiroshi Nohara sighed as he put away the newspaper and got up from his comfortable sofa. "Yes, dear..."
He fetched a broom and went up into the bedroom. He raised his cleaning tool to sweep whatever little critter Shin-chan had brought into the household this time out of the window... when he stared directly into two big, enormous eyes... bigger than his wife's teacup saucers.
Akane growled dangerously. "Man..."
And while Hiroshi screamed like a little girl, Shin-chan stuck his head into his parent's bedroom in awe. "Cooooool..." he muttered. "Dad, can I keep her?"
----
Setsuna and Hotaru stood in front of the house and watched as the titanic figure of Akane tried snatching the husband of the family out of the window.
"You know..." Setsuna muttered while clutching her twisted rod. "She somehow looks like someone has inflated her..."
Somehow, this remark gave Hotaru an idea... "Wait here, Setsuna-mama," she called out as she ran towards the towering monkey.
"Hotaru!" Setsuna shouted. "What are you doing? She'll trample you! Come back here!"
But the second-youngest Senshi didn't listen. She approached Akane's backside, drew her Silence Glaive, looked closely at the monkey-girl's butt that was hovering above her head, and took aim...
Suddenly, Akane felt like looking down... And when she saw what the little girl with the purple hair was up to, she sweated. "DON'T YOU DARE!!" she yelled.
Saturn smirked and drew back her weapon...
Akane gulped. "Oh nooo..."
Saturn grinned widely. "Oooooh yeeeesss..."
And she poked her glaive right into the left butt cheek of the titanic daimon.
PFFFFSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHH...
Akane pouted as she shrunk down to doll-size. "Why me..." she whined.
Hotaru effortlessly picked up the tiny monkey-girl and carried her over to where Pluto was waiting.
"See?" she asked the stunned Senshi of time and held up the struggling Akane. "Easy as pie."
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(Posted Tue, 12 Dec 2006 07:47)
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