“ ‘By the PowerGamers of Numbskull, grant me might beyond might. Ultra– ULTRA– ULTRA– H—’ –Oh, no. I am not saying that every time I want to transform.” Asuka slapped the note card down on the table and glared.
“You wanted the Normal Identity drawback, young miss,” the Game Master observed, unimpressed. “Silly poses and catch phrases are part of the price you pay for extra power points.”
“Yeah, right,” Asuka muttered. She agreed reluctantly, “that’s fair enough, but… come on, let it be something original and classy, at least.”
“You haven’t given me much to work with,” the Game Master protested. “You’ve built an unoriginally powerful character with no background at all. Your friends, on the other hand, are already drawn into the game.”
“Oh yeah, they’re really absorbed by it,” Asuka pouted, and glared at Shinji and Rei, who were sitting like dummies behind their character sheets. “Hmph, fine. Since karinka doll girl’s a strange visitor from another planet, and whimpji’s an accident of science, Ultra Lady will be, ah, the descendant of erhm, the Norse god, Balder –that’s why she’s vulnerable to wood and darkness and stuff!– and she’s fighting for love and justice in modern Japan… because… whatever! ”
“Balder was vulnerable to… Nevermind. Very well, Asuka,” the Game Master pronounced, holding a figurine over the battlemap, “you have just arrived at the international airport when the city comes under attack by metal men from the sewers. Finding a concealed corner, you utter your transformation phrase and spring into action.” He looked at her expectantly.
“Do I have to? … Fine!” She took a deep breath. “I’ll concentrate, hold a silly pose, and chant my secret word.…”
“Well?”
“Uhm,” she thought about it blankly, had an epiphany, then explained, “er, well, it’s a secret, isn’t it?”
“Fair enough,” the Game Master gave in after a moment’s contest of wills, and plunked the figurine down on the grid and whispered, “on your head be it.” “It’s ‘Shazbat,’ by the way.”
Asuka was rather shocked by the sudden surge of lightning. “Urg. I’ll never get used to that. Wait! Where am I, what am I do… Oh, right.”
Ultra Lady, peered around the corner. Assured nobody was looking, she took a three quick steps, and launched into the air like a drunken missile. Rapidly zooming over Tokyo IV she noted that robot troops were concentrating on a little fracas close to the city center.
“Here she comes to save the day!” she cried as she dove towards the fray. “Ultra-Lady! Eye-blast away! Arrrggh! My eyes! My eyes! They burn! Arrrggh! ”
The unexpected rain of lightning from above, followed by the collision of a heavy object of some kind into a billboard, brought Shinji time to organise his thoughts while the robots were distracted by the potential new threat. “We need to retreat. I can lift you to a roof top one at a time, but…”
“One moment, Mister Shove,” Rei-γ interrupted, and the three duplicate girls merged into one.
“… weird, but helpful,” Shinji muttered. Concentrating briefly, he mentally grasped the singular Rei and thrust her up to a ledge. Hearing the robots advance behind him, and suddenly aware of the girl’s shield fading around him, he braced his feet and leapt. He shot off the ground with a mighty whoosh,… and hit the ledge with a craptastic whump.
“Are you still functional, Mister Shove?” Rei enquired as she leaned over the ledge.
“Impact resistance,” Shinji muttered as his hands clawed for purchase. “Gotta love it. Still hurts like frickin’… ow. Can I have a hand here?”
Rei provided six. “There appears to be a woman in the beer advertisement,” one of her observed with mild surprise. “Does that really help sales?”
“Maybe,” a stunned Shinji blinked at the surprising sight of a shapely, wriggling, buttock protruding from a giant beer stein.
“Shut up,” Asuka growled. “Oww! My head. Whoever you are, just… get me out of this… wooden deathtrap.”
And then they were three… or maybe five… depending on how you counted the boy in white hoodie, the red haired spitfire, and the sometimes three girls in under the gauzy blue force fields.
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(Posted Thu, 31 May 2007 11:29)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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