In the midst of breakfast, the panda raised a sign. [Starting today, I, Saotome Genma, have a job]
“You been lying on the application forms again, Pops?”
[What?] flip [Have I not raised you to be honest and respectful?] flip [When have I ever lied to get a job?]
“Well, there was the time you put ‘Extensive experience with spirits and liqueurs’.”
[Was I lying?] flip [I have even gotten drunk on Tequila. There are very few Japanese who can claim that]
Akane broke into a run as they approached the school, and Ranma maintained her casual pace on the fencetop. The melee was already under way.
The boys intent on competing among themselves had largely eliminated each other. Those who followed the Kuno Theory of Courtship were also reduced in number, although not to the same extent. Akane didn’t differentiate; she pummelled the lot of them.
Ranma strolled peacefully into the schoolyard as the last of the Kendo Club succumbed to Akane’s fists, and made her way between the fallen to the doors.
“All your fault,” muttered a voice behind her. She turned, to see a figure in a most curious posture against the wall. It took her a moment to recognise the golfer, and another to realise the reason he was holding his arms out like a scarecrow was a five iron driven through his sleeves. She smiled and gave him a cheerful wave, continuing on her way.
“Rejoice that you may run to my embrace without fear!”
“Uh, I ain’t afraid of your embrace,” said Ranma, shying away from the tall boy with his arms outstretched. “I just don’t think I’d like it very much.”
“Ah, I understand that habit has made you unsure; but now I have struck down the foul sorcerer holding you captive you are free to express your desire for me!”
“Er, what?”
“Indeed, for you witnessed your emancipation with your own eyes, this Sunday last, when I drove the fiend from the field of battle with my unparalleled prowess.”
“You mean when Pops left your unconscious body out in the rain? You do realise he’s my father, don’t you?”
“Impossible, my flame-haired maiden!” declared Kuno. “He has clearly abducted you from the bosom of your rightful family for nefarious puposes – but fear not, for the Blue Thunder shall bring him to justice for this crime as well!”
“Duh. Akane, can you make him see sense?”
“Nope,” replied the other girl. “I can make him see stars, though.”
“That’ll do…”
The liveried van swerved out of the traffic and stopped smartly at the kerb. Nakamoto Hiokai checked his mirror quickly before stepping out into the road clutching the sack and his official key.
The roadside box that matched the van soon yielded to the key, and he started transferring the contents to the sack.
Hiokai had long since lost even passing curiosity in the letters and parcels he handled; all he cared about was not damaging them (which was a disciplinary offence punishable by docked pay) and completing his rounds as quickly as possible so he got more time at home. In this regard, the Monday morning collection was always a problem, the lack of a Sunday collection ensuring that the post boxes in residential districts were nearly full after the weekend.
So, when a certain letter addressed to a certain martial artist at a certain dojo in the next ward passed through his hands, he paid it no more attention than he did the one for a former bank robber in Sapporo, or the one for a terrorist in France.
“I’m really sorry, Ranma.”
“You said that already.”
“I know.” She shifted her bag. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s nothing I haven’t had before,” said the redhead. “Well, not exactly, but no worse than.. oh, you know what I mean.”
“Um.”
“But we were on the same team!”
“I’m sorry!”
“I mean, if I’d been on the other team, at least I could think that you’d done it deliberately…”
“Akane shot her friend a sidelong glance. “Um… would that really be better?”
“Ranma bit her lip thoughtfully. Eventually, she pronounced, “On the whole, no.”
“Oh.” She fumbled for something to say. Somehow, she thought ‘I’m sorry’ wouldn’t be appropriate. Fortunately, inspiration struck. “Oh, here’s Doctor Tofu’s.” She waved at the panda. “Hi, Uncle Genma.”
“Growf,” replied Genma with a particularly lethargic sweep of the broom.
Ranma brushed past the panda up the steps into the surgery. Akane rushed in her wake.
“Hello young lady. Ah, Hello Akane-chan.”
“H-hello Doctor Tofu. Um, this is Ranma, she’s staying with us for a while.” She looked down and shuffled her feet. “I, um, I hit her with a softball in gym today.”
“So I see,” remarked the doctor cheerfully. “Come into the exam room and I’ll take a look t it. Two people in the house with the same name? That must get quite confusing.”
“Two?”
Ranma snorted softly. “Pops told you I’m a guy, didn’t he?”
Doctor Tofu gave her a startled look. “You’re Saotome-san’s, ah…”
“‘Son’?” provided the redhead. “Uh-huh. And now you know I’m a girl he’ll tell you I got cursed to turn into a girl at Jusenkyo like he got turned into a panda, only my curse locked for some reason.” She sighed as she hopped up onto the exam table. “Him and Tendo-san are the only people who believe that. I’ve always been a girl.”
“I see…” said the doctor, looking troubled. Carefully, he pulled up the dressing the school nurse had provided and frowned slightly at the wound beneath. Softly, he said, “Ah. I have a salve that works wonders.” He let the dressing drop back into place and went to a cabinet against the wall, producing a small jar of sticky-looking goo and another adhesive dressing. He gave a worried look in Akane’s direction as he turned. “Ah…”
The telephone rang in the front office. “Oh,” said Tofu with an air of relief. “Would you answer that for me, Akane-chan?”
“Sure,” replied the girl, slipping out of the room.
Briskly, the doctor removed the old dressing and applied a very thin smear of the salve. As he opened the fresh dressing, he remarked, “Your ki is distinctively different from you father’s.”
“I’ve always been good at ki exercises.”
“I don’t think that’s it, although they may be related.” He pressed the dressing into place.
“Uh-huh.”
“Akane’s a trustworthy girl. She’ll keep a friend’s secrets.”
Akane bustled back intot eh room, and the doctor cut off what he might have added. “There, all done,” he said brightly. “I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s completely healed by morning.”
“That’s great!” interrupted Akane. She sidled closer and snagged Ranma’s elbow. “Have you got your bag? I’m sorry, Doctor, we need to run.”
“Of course, Akane-chan.”
Akane towed Ranma to the front door before the shorter girl could object. “What’s the rush?”
“There’s a girl Doctor Tofu likes,” said Akane tightly, “and she’s coming here.”
“Ok, and…”
“Boy!” boomed the figure emerging from the small kitchen. “You aren’t using that little scratch as an excuse to get out of practice tonight!”
Ranma waved dismissively and tripped as she was bodily dragged through the surgery door.
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(Posted Mon, 16 Jul 2007 00:24)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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