"Welcome, Auntie Saotome!" Kasumi smiled as she played the part of the perfect hostess. "I hope you had a pleasant journey..."
"Oh, well, we bumped into a white duck when we were entering Nerima airspace, but other than that, it was nice," Nodoka said.
Nabiki raised her eyebrow. "Air... space?" she wondered.
"That's right!" Ranko grinned and showed the middle Tendo sister her broom. "Now that I finally have my own broomstick, I can fly anywhere I want."
Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "Um, yeah... right..." She walked up to Ranma and whispered: "No offense, Saotome, but your mom and sis both have a screw loose..."
"They are not crazy," Ranma frowned. "They are witches."
Nabiki smirked. "Yeah, right... nice try, Saotome! I'm not buying that!"
"And how do you think they managed to change Pops into a mouse?" Ranma asked her.
She shrugged. "Who tells me that this is really your father? maybe they made a stop at a pet shop or something."
"Oh my..." Kasumi suddenly gasped. "I completely forgot to make dinner in all the excitement..."
"Ah, no need, Kasumi-chan!" Nodoka smiled. "I can make a nice dinner for us all in no time."
"Really?" Kasumi perked up. "Oh, maybe there's something I can learn from you..." She was always eager to learn more in the kitchen, and she imagined Ranma's mother to be the epitome of the classic Japanese housewife, just like her mother...
"I'd be happy to, Kasumi," Nodoka smiled. "I thought we could start with something simple... a nice, traditional witches' dish..."
"Oh no!" Ranko shouted. "No witch food, Mom, please!"
'Spare our weak stomachs,' Genma-mouse signed.
"I'm sure it can't be that bad," Kasumi said. "What did you have in mind, auntie?"
The middle-aged witch tapped her finger against her chin. "Well, I thought we could make some toad dumplings... what do you think?"
Everyone blinked. "Um... that's just an artistic name, isn't it?" Nabiki asked.
"What... kind of ingredients do we need?" Kasumi asked, now with a bit of worry creeping into her voice.
"Well, for eight persons, we need four fresh toads, spider legs and ground locusts..."
Ranma was beginning to feel nauseous. "Thanks, I've heard enough..." he mumbled.
"Mom, you can't expect normal non-witches to like your food," Ranko complained. She shuddered. "I can't get used to it either..."
Nodoka seemed hurt. "Only once! Only once I want you to accept my traditional, home-made food, Ranko-chan..."
"I'm sorry to say this, but I have to agree," Nabiki said. "I'd rather have some tasty pancakes instead of toad dumplings..."
Ranko licked her lips. "Pancakes, yummy! That's a good idea, Nabiki!" She closed her eyes and concentrated on a spell.
"Ekacnap raeppa!" she shouted.
And a pancake appeared. A nice, hot, sizzling pancake that was dripping with butter and maple syrup.
And it was directly on top of Nabiki's head.
"OUCH!" the mercenary girl shouted. "That's hot!" She flailed around, and the pancake fell down to the floor.
"Ranko-chan..." Nodoka sighed. "You're not supposed to make food appear on other people's heads... Ekacnap raeppasid!" And the pancake disappeared, although its delicious smell was still hanging in the air.
"Sorry about that, Nabiki!" Ranko winced. "Sorry, Mom... I'll be more careful from now on..."
"Well, I dunno..." Akane smirked. "I think the look suited you, sis. Maybe that will be all the rage: Pancake hats!"
"Sounds great!" Ranma chuckled. "Hats you can eat..."
"Very funny..." Nabiki growled, while wiping butter and maple syrup out of her hair. "Damn, I need a shower... Ranko, if I ever doubt your magic abilities again, feel free to drop as many pancakes on my head as you like."
Kasumi sighed. "Oh well, I guess I'll just prepare some sandwiches..."
"I'll help!" Akane and Nodoka shouted at once.
Kasumi was not the only one to wince. "Um, sorry, but I think I can handle it. Thanks for the offer, though."
Akane frowned while her sister disappeared in the kitchen. "Why won't she accept my help?" she mumbled. "It's not like I'm going to use toads and locusts..."
Soun cleared his throat. "Um, for the sake of our stomachs, I suggest that from now on, Kasumi will take care of the cooking. No offense, Nodoka!"
"None taken," the Saotome matriarch sighed as she sat down at the table with the others. "You're not the first 'normal' people who don't like my food..."
"I sure hope Kasumi hurries with the sandwiches," Ranma sighed. "I'm so hungry..." He sniffed the air. "And the delicious smell of pancake doesn't help either..."
He sat down as well, but then he accidentally touched his sister's broom and knocked it down.
"Kamikaze!" Ranko shouted and caught it. "Oniichan, please be a bit more careful with him!"
"Oops, sorry about that, sis." Ranma grinned sheepishly.
Ranko stroked her broom's bristles. "Poor Kamikaze..." she murmured. "You're not afraid, aren't you? Please don't be angry with oniichan, he didn't mean to knock you down. He's just a little clumsy, that's all..."
Ranma sweatdropped. "Um... why are you talking to a broom?" he wondered. "It's not like it can answer back..."
"Of course he answers," Ranko insisted. "You just don't understand him. Isn't that right, Kamikaze?"
Ranma's eyes (and those of everyone else except for Nodoka, for that matter) nearly popped out of his skull. "S-sis... your broom... it just... nodded!"
"Is that thing alive?" Nabiki gasped.
"He's not a 'thing'!" Ranko grumbled. "And although you can't quite say he's alive... he understands me."
"Now that's one weird broom..." Akane muttered. "Looks as shaggy as every other old broom, but..."
Ranko gasped when all of a sudden, Kamikaze jumped out of her grasp. "Kamikaze, don't!" she shouted. "Oh boy..."
Akane yelped when the mad broom leapt at her and began to tickle her whole body with his bristles. She gasped for air and began to giggle uncontrollably. "R-r-ranko..." she snorted. "Hahahahahah... please, c-call your broom back... hahahahahah!"
"Kamikaze, stop it! I mean it!" Ranko shouted resolutely. "Ezakimak, eb llits!"
As soon as she spoke those words, Kamikaze became as stiff as a board and clattered down to the floor.
"Well, finally..." Nodoka sighed. "After all, Kamikaze is your broom, and you're responsible for it."
Akane gasped for air. "Th-thanks, Ranko..." she muttered. "Wh-why did he do that?"
"You shouldn't have called him 'shaggy'," Ranko said in an apologetic tone of voice. "He tends to be a bit touchy, I'm afraid... and he hears everything that is said around him." She sighed. "I guess I'm a bad witch when I can't even control my own broom..."
"Now, now, you've still got much to learn, but every witch your age has the same problems," Nodoka reassuringly told her daughter. "At least you managed to stop him in time."
"I guess so..." Ranko murmured as she stroked Kamikaze's bristles again. "But I still hate to force him to do anything by casting a spell..."
'That broom reminds me of Ryoga...' Ranma thought. 'He's also quite touchy and always attacks me, just because I call him 'pig-boy'...'
"The sandwiches are ready!" Kasumi called and brought a tray with the food.
"Yummy! Finally, some real food!" Ranko grinned and took one of the sandwiches. "Thanks, Kasumi!"
Kasumi beamed. "It was my pleasure, Ranko-chan!"
Nodoka frowned, but said nothing. She reached for another sandwich and took a bite.
'Well, it's not bad...' she thought. 'But still nothing compared to true witch meal...'
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(Posted Sat, 05 Jul 2008 12:51)
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