Once outside the store, Ranma shuddered slightly at the intense feeling of having just barely avoided something he didn't want to experience. Yet as far as he could tell, Ranma had come out of the incident on top.
Now all he had to do was find Ukyo a present that wouldn’t convince everyone that found out about it that he was a total pervert. Something safe, like maybe some jewelry or some perfume or something like that. Almost anything would be better, and less humiliating, than presenting her with a gift certificate from that kind of store, magical or not.
As Ranma made a bee line for the nearest 'girly' store he could spot, Nabiki was wondering how Ranma had gotten into that closed adult novelty shop. More importantly, she wanted to know what he'd been doing in there; Nabiki smelt money to be made.
If nothing else, Nabiki could make up for her lost time by teasing Ranma about his 'eagerness' to be in a 'girly' store later on. Of course she would drop all kinds of hints about knowing why he'd been so eager while she was at it; it was always so much fun to watch 'manly man' Ranma Saotome squirm around like a nervous little girl when she picked on him.
To Nabiki's chagrin though, Ranma merely picked up and bought the first sickeningly cute thing he saw and rushed back out. Such an event would hardly be any fun teasing him about. Ranma's little jaunt to the food court on the other hand gave Nabiki the perfect opportunity to grill him for some information.
Ranma was settling into a bag full of burgers when Nabiki chose to make her appearance. "So how's my favorite, future brother-in-law doing this afternoon?" Nabiki drawled, slightly out of character for herself.
"Fine, just picking out a present for Ukyo's birthday tomorrow. I had a little money left over and I figured I’d grab a bite to eat before heading back home," the boy replied offhandedly.
"Really? I'm sure Ukyo will absolutely adore that cute little glass fairy you bought her; it's so personalized," teased Nabiki as she started in on him.
Ranma cringed openly at the verbal assault. "You saw me buy it, huh," deduced Ranma embarrassedly.
Nabiki nodded triumphantly as she admitted to it. "Not only that, Saotome, but I even saw the store you came out of just before you bought it. I'm sure my little sister would just love to know where you went looking for her rival's birthday present," Nabiki cajoled as she set him up for the kill.
Ranma started to sweat so bad Nabiki could actually see it on him. "Um, yeah. About that, I didn't actually know what kind of store it was until I was already inside it. So you see, it really was an honest mistake, Nabiki," he explained, trying in vain to redeem himself.
Nabiki raised an incredulous eyebrow at the explanation, "oh, so it took you nearly an hour to figure out you were browsing an adult novelty shop?" She asked pointedly.
"Ah, no, it didn't. Actually it took me that long to escape a MAGIC adult novelty shop. You have to buy something to leave that place, but the prices were so high I couldn't buy anything; and there's this weird warning about not loitering in there too.
"Luckily I managed to convince the guy that his prices were too high to expect much business; I bet even Kuno would think twice about the prices they had on everything in there. That's without even mentioning what those prices where on!" Ranma complained to his less than sympathetic audience.
"We all know you're dirt poor Ranma. So how did you get out of there if you couldn't buy anything. I already know you came out of there empty handed, or so it seemed," Nabiki accused him suspiciously.
Ranma sweated nervously for several seconds under Nabiki’s piercing gaze, barely managing to hold his nervous silence. "Out with it already, Saotome. How did you get out of there?" demanded Nabiki in the same accusing tone she'd been using.
"He said he could change the prices. But only if he hired a new clerk for the store," Ranma tried, obviously hoping Nabiki wouldn't press him for a more detailed answer.
Nabiki was quite happy to disappoint him on that score. "And just who exactly did he hire?" she asked knowingly, thoroughly enjoying Ranma's discomfort.
"Me," Ranma answered in a diminished voice, obviously embarrassed by the admission.
"Akane's just going to love hearing about this one, Ranma. So how much are they paying you in there? They are paying you money, right?" Nabiki queried her prey haughtily.
"Ten thousand yen an hour," Ranma answered as if admitting to murder.
Nabiki raised her eyebrow again, that was actually really good pay for a highschool student. "So what kind of hours are they wanting you to work?" she asked, wondering if maybe she might like to hire on too. Watching Ranma squirm inside of a magical adult store like that just might be worth the damage to her reputation, the pay definitely was worth thinking about.
"He just said 'as needed', but I think it means I'll be there a few minutes before and after any customers arrive," Ranma told her, sounding unusually certain of the statement. This also served to remind Nabiki that Ranma had specified that it was a magic store.
"That's really going to interfere with your daily life you know, Ranma. I can just imagine a few people's reactions if you disappeared in the middle of a duel or something," Nabiki pointed out cynically.
"Um, believe it or not, he promised me that wouldn't happen. The guy told me I'd always arrive about ten minutes or so before I disappeared. Got some pretty good benefits out of the job too," Ranma countered, suddenly taking a tiny bit of pride in his new job.
Nabiki did her best to remain skeptical, "such as?" she asked.
Ranma tried to look smug as he ticked off the benefits. "Free dental and medical, said it covers more than most policies too. Triple pay on holidays, commissions on sales, immunity to magic with permanent effects. I've still got my curse, but I won't have to worry about getting stuck anymore.
"I also get a ten percent discount on store merchandise, not that I plan on needing it; but it comes with a five percent discount for friends and family and an in-store line of credit for anyone stupid enough to visit me at work. That way none of you'll have to get stuck there like I did," Ranma bragged, mostly without realizing it.
Nabiki grew more skeptical with each perk, "and what was the catch, Ranma?" she ask suspiciously. Ranma's reaction proved she was right to ask about it.
"Heh, heh . . . Lifetime employment," the martial artist replied nervously. Nabiki was pretty sure she knew why, too. Lifetime employment was usually considered a perk, the idea that you'd never get laid off would sell almost any job anywhere. But with the way Ranma stated it, Nabiki was quite certain it was more of a 'drawback' than a perk.
"Good one, Saotome." criticized Nabiki, rolling her eyes. Whatever it was Ranma had gotten into this time, he'd gotten into it deep.
"Tell me about it," groused Ranma dejectedly. The martial artist quickly losing the illusion he'd made for himself involving his new job.
Nabiki pretended to take pity on the poor sap; he'd been taken for a fool and apparently deserved it. "Well, look on the bright side, Ranma; at least now you'll have a way of paying off that giant tab you still owe me," she added in a faintly consoling voice as she stood up.
Just before she twisted the knife a little bit, "I'm sure your mother will appreciate that friends and family discount you mentioned too. Of course she'll probably have a few recommendations on things you should buy for your future wife; but then again, all things come with a price, Ranma," Nabiki added while patting him on the shoulder. She giggled as Ranma paled at the thought.
Ranma ate the rest of his snack without enjoying it, irritably watching Nabiki leave the food court after she'd mocked him. The problem, Ranma decided, was that he couldn't decide which bothered him more right now; the idea that the fiancée's would try to kill him over this, or the realization that his mother would probably approve of his new job.
But since Ranma had more fiancees than mothers, he strongly suspected that his medical policy would see a lot of use, and soon. Particularly since Akane would be the first of the fiances to find out about Ranma's latest dilemma, thanks to Nabiki.
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(Posted Mon, 07 Jul 2008 02:04)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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