Bing. Bong. “This stop is Furinkan. Today’s Ranma Advisory is three.”
“‘Ranma Advisory’?” Minako voiced the thoughts of several Senshi.
“It’s like a UV advisory,” explained Motoko. “The higher the number, the greater the likelihood and intensity of Ranma-related chaos. It goes from one to eleven.”
“Why eleven?” asked Osaka.
“Well, most advisories go from one to ten. When you’re, dealing with Ranma-san, you’ve got to go to eleven. It’s one more.”
The spacey girl nodded at this. Sakaki, however, frowned. “Couldn’t you just have ten indicate the highest possible for both?”
“Nah,” replied her companion. “Then it wouldn’t go t’ ‘leven. ‘S one more, y’ see.”
Michiru decided not to add to this, instead turning to Makoto and asking “How did you know about this?”
The Jovian Senshi looked at her flatly. “Do you really think I never looked into a neighborhood filled with grossly overpowered martial artists?”
“Point.”
Sakaki, who by now had abandoned the argument over the virtues of eleven over ten, asked “Does anyone have his address?”
“Oh, Ami was going to bring it,” Minako said out of hand.
“Ami?” Osaka, confident in eleven’s superiority, (it is one more, after all,) joined in. “Huh, that’s nice o’ her. I thought she was stayin’ at the shrine.”
“…She is.” The Venusian Senshi paled. “Crap.”
Haruka snickered. “Honestly, what would you Inners do without us? Michi-chan, the address, if you please.”
Michiru looked as uncertain as she could without sacrificing any composure. “I thought you had it.”
A brief silence followed, punctuated by a gust of wind and a Hibiki tumbleweed.
“I guess we should ask for directions,” Minako finally said. This was met with awkward nods.
Ukyo had never left and Shampoo had already returned. Mousse was asking directions from a fire hydrant in Kyoto, while Cologne was busy supervising the temporary help. Kodachi would be back in a week, having agreed to a tour of several conventions. Her brother had been deported to Siberia, and it would be another month before he caused an international incident forcing the Russians to demand that he be taken back. Ryoga was wandering the multiverse, Happosai was doing inventory on his silky darlings, and Pantyhose Taro was somewhere in Okinawa. All this meant that the rumors of six, count ‘em, six new girls asking after Ranma raised the RA to a mere 5.5 instead of the 10.7 that it could have been.
“Really? Who’d you hear it from?” Nabiki was on the phone, one of her friend/contacts providing this particularly juicy piece of gossip. “I see. How’d the photos look? Huh. Thanks again.” She hung up and sighed. “Exactly what we didn’t need.”
“Is something the matter?”
The mercenary girl managed to contain her shock to a small twitch. Kasumi had always been quiet and unobtrusive while she kept house. Ever since she had awakened as a Senshi, she’d turned into some sort of ninja maid. “Apparently, there’s a full half-dozen new girls looking for Ranma. One of whom is the Kaiou Michiru.”
“The violinist?”
“Precisely.”
“Oh my.” Kasumi considered this. “I never took Saotome-san as very musically inclined.”
Her sister gave a sharp laugh. “Her family owns a third of a subsection of Juuban. Knowing Uncle Genma, he’d do anything to get a piece of that.”
“Don’t speak poorly of people behind their backs, Nabiki-chan.”
“Hey, I’d do the same thing! Heck, I might have a better chance. They say she’s… well, not interested in men.”
“Nabiki!” Kasumi frowned. A shiver made its way down her sister’s spine. “There is no need to spread such slanderous rumors!”
Michiru muffled a sneeze elegantly.
“Gesundheit,” said Minako.
“You speak German?” asked the musician.
“Only enough to order food and assassinations.”
“Eh?”
“Nothing.”
Nabiki shrugged. “Hey, if she is, there’s nothing wrong with it.”
“I suppose…” The elder girl sighed. “Still, Akane-chan and Ranma-kun only just managed to make some progress in their relationship. It would be such a shame for some new fiancée to appear and drive a new wedge between them.”
Her sister nodded and thought. “You know, there is a way to find out exactly how many other engagements are waiting in the wings.”
“Oh?”
Nabiki grinned. “Oh yes.” What happened next proved that, sensible as they may have been, the two were still the children of Soun. “It’s time for Nabiki—”
“And Kasumi’s—”
“Operation: Interrogate the Panda!”
“Politely!” amended the elder.
The Gates of Time were seeing more activity than they had in the last millennium. Tendrils of the ubiquitous mists curdled and coiled about the Gates and the Senshi, twisted by the currents of magic into shapes best left undescribed. The howling winds coming from the open Gates drowned out almost all other sound. The Senshi of time stood still as a statue, Time Key Staff raised and eyes faintly glowing. The only motion came from her lips, a silent chant in a language that was long dead when the Egyptians first began building pyramids. The Senshi of ice and wisdom was frantically analyzing the four-dimensional fractal that was the ever-branching future timeline, following branch after branch from a pink-labelled point to the blue-marked now. Her fingers blurred across the touch screen of her Computer, graphical interfaces abandoned in favor of an almost direct mental link.
Finally, the trail was complete. The signal was given, a shout that was barely heard against the Gates’ wailing. Pluto complied at once, swinging down the Staff and closing the Gates with a slam like dropping the lid on a lead sarcophagus.
For a time, the only sounds were those of two women catching their breath and the ear-ringing absence of a sound that had been omnipresent. Finally, the two looked at one another and grinned. Even though one had stood here for millennia and the other had not two decades to her name, for that moment, they were as equals.
Then they both passed out.
Calera Marker considered the meal. It had been so long since the vampires could come together and enjoy a family meal. She hadn’t attended a clustersuck since she was little more than a girl herself! And the boy seemed custom-made to fit the family’s tastes. Dishonesty, pride, stress, jealousy… If she weren’t an atheist, she’d have declared it manna from Heaven.
Of course, four vampires feeding on the same body carried some basic physiological risks, but that was where dear little Karin came in. Calera’s middle child was an embarrassment at times, but her anomalous blood-generation might have very well saved this Hibiki boy’s life. Good thing he was so unhappy. Poor Karin-chan had almost had an explosive nosebleed the moment she’d seen him. Oh, after dinner she’d holed herself in her room, wailing about being disloyal to her little human pet, but it wasn’t as though she had to tell him.
Oh yes, that reminded her. Calera put a hand over the boy’s forehead and extended her will, erasing any memories he might have of his repeated exsanguination. (Such an elegant word. A shame Japanese lacked something analogous.)
Still, she was getting a bit concerned. It was normal for the human to be unresponsive for a brief time after being fed upon, but she had never seen something like this. The boy seemed almost comatose. His pulse was regular, his breathing steady. He was just…not there. She thought back to that last family meal. The entrée had staggered away within a few minutes. This Hibiki boy though… It was as though they had stripped him of everything. He just lay there with a glazed expression and a stupid grin.
The Marker matriarch’s thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door. “Another human!?” she muttered to herself. She would've sensed another vampire this close. Darn, and here she was, already full. Hmmph. She’d just have to erase the thing’s memory and send it on its way. Maybe have it carry out the Hibiki boy.
Opening the door revealed a not-too-young girl. Calera estimated her to be roughly sixteen. Rather good looking, in an innocent, waifish way, though that bust gave something of a counterpoint. “Hello, Ma’am,” the newcomer said politely. “I hope you have enjoyed the meal I delivered for you?”
Calera paused for a moment before realizing the girl meant the Hibiki boy. “Ah, yes. Delicious. I’ve never felt nor tasted such deception before. Truly a meal I shall never forget.”
The girl smiled. “Thank you. If I may collect Hibiki-san?”
The vampire paused. “You know far too much about us, girl. While I appreciate the meal, we can’t have humans sacrificing one another to us. We want to keep a low profile.” Mentally, she prepared herself for a full memory erasure. If this girl had to suffer a full mindwipe to protect her family, so be it.
The girl simply smiled and…flickered. That was the only word for it. One moment she was there, the next there was naught but a small metal ball where her chest had been, and the moment after that she had returned. “I understand your concern, Marker-san, but I am not human, and I and my charge will be leaving your universe soon enough. In any case, your psionic abilities will not work on me.” She entered the house as she said this, homing in on Ryoga with machine-like precision. Understandable, given that she was a machine. “In any case, thank you for your assistance with this experiment.” With that, she vanished in a blinding flash of light.
Calera blinked. Why was the front door open? And why was she so full? She usually drank rather lightly…
“Chiba-kun, do you have those X-rays I asked for?”
“Right here, sir.”
“Chiba-kun, could you order more Benzedrine? We’re running low.”
“I’ll get right on that, ma’am.”
“Hey Chiba-kun, didja get that thing I sent ya?”
“Sorry, no, Potumasu-sensei.”
“Chiba-kun?”
Mamoru paused to catch his breath. At times it felt like he was the only intern in the entire hospital. He looked to see Ami’s mother holding a phone. “Ah, yes, Mizuno-sensei?”
She held out the receiver. “Call for you.”
“Eh?” He took the phone. “Hello?”
“Mamoru-san, we’ve got a situation.”
“Em-chan?” The once and future King of Earth was well familiar with the VG Girls, since his best friend ran their place of work. “What’s up?”
“There was a youma attack at the Crown.”
“What!?” Mamoru paused, noticing the looks he was attracting. He moved to a less conspicuous spot and, more quietly, asked, “Was anyone hurt?”
“Nothing serious, but Motoki-san’s been pretty seriously drained. We were hoping you could get him home. We’ll probably close the Crown early.”
“I’d love to, Em-chan, but I swamped right now. I’ll call the girls. They’ll be happy to help.”
“Thanks, Mamoru-san. Can I save my game now?”
Mamoru had learned this was Emjiyes’s way of saying goodbye during phone conversations. “Go ahead, Em-chan. See you soon.”
“Hopefully.”
Mamoru sighed and dialed a number he could enter in his sleep. A few rings later and he heard a voice that made his earlier toil seem completely worth it. “Hello?”
“Hi, Usako.” The rose thrower had to hold the phone some distance from his ear.
“Mamo-chan!” As he’d predicted, Usagi’s response was easily audible from five feet away. “How are you? Are you busy? I miss you… Oh! Guess what? We found two new Se—”
She was interrupted. The background noise suggested a brief tussle for the phone. “Baka,” came clearly across the line in Rei’s voice. “What’s up, Mamoru-san?”
“Apparently it’s a busy day at the crown. Em-chan just told me Motoki’s feeling particularly drained. Fortunately, the place cleared out a little while ago.”
Rei frowned. The Senshi-equivalent of Earth had indicated his true message loud and clear. “I see. We’ll go over and see if we can’t cheer him up.”
“Thanks. Sorry I can’t come, but…”
“It’s fine. Mamoru-san. Have a nice day.”
“You too.”
Rei hung up, and then turned back to her Princess, who was presently being held back by a flailing and desperate Hotaru. “I can’t believe you were about to blurt out something Senshi-related over an unsecured line!”
“I can’t believe I managed to hold her that long,” panted Hotaru, who eagerly released Usagi. “What did Mamoru-san want?”
“There’s been an attack at the Crown. Motoki-san’s been drained, but the youma’s apparently not there anymore.”
The Moon Senshi switched from petulant whining to regal demeanor in an eyeblink. “Is it that Dominus thing?”
“He didn’t say. In any case, we should go.”
Usagi nodded. “Hotaru-chan, you can heal Motoki-san. Rei, you and I can go look for the youma.”
“We’re a little short-handed,” Hotaru noted warily.
The Princess frowned. “True… See if you can’t contact Ami and Setsuna-san after you help Motoki-san.”
“Right.”
Three transformation sequences later, and the Senshi were off.
“Guys?” Naru re-entered from the kitchen. “Rei’s outta juice. Soda OK?” She paused, noting the marked absence of magical girls in the room. “Huh.”
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