Prometheus finished eating and set a bit of gold on the table as payment. Poultry had never tasted so good before, in fact he might just spend the next few decades eating poultry.
He had seen those televisions at his first stop and realized what a great scrying device that was. He had liked the idea and whipped one up in a moment; it hadn’t worked quite right at first, but after skimming a few books in a library he’d gotten it right. It was really amazing just how common books were now! Libraries were everywhere, and when one could read tens of pages a minute catching up on the times was easy. After he finished in the library, he realized he didn’t really have anywhere to put a television at the moment so sent it off to Ranma, he could probably do something with it.
He didn’t understand this modern, doesn’t everyone always call it that, world completely, but he thought it was a pretty good time to be free. Of course even during the Black Death would have been a good time to be free, but that was beside the point.
It was odd though that there wasn’t any indication of the gods in the literature or lifestyle he had seen. People were worshipping all sorts of crazy things. Zeus might have allowed monotheism, but the rest of the gods wouldn’t have let it become the major religion.
He had put it off for a few hours, but he really needed to get back to Olympus and see whether he was welcome and they had just forgotten about him, or if Zeus was still mad. It was very odd that no one had come to talk to him yet. It wasn’t like he had been hiding. He had just been wandering the world seeing the new sights.
Prometheus shifted locations to Mount Olympus. Humans often misunderstood what this place was. The gods didn’t live on Olympus; if they did mortals would constantly be bothering them. However this was the anchor point. The home of the gods was a stable pocket universe which they had made and then anchored to Mount Olympus. Though actually pocket universe was a bit misleading, it was actually closer to the size of Australia, but gods were always a bit ostentatious.
There wasn’t ever a visible entrance… well that wasn’t quite true, but those gates had actually been a joke that somehow stuck. To enter you had to come to Olympus and then shift through the weak barrier between the two universes.
The only problem was that there wasn’t a pocket universe here anymore. Prometheus strained to sense it, but it just wasn’t there. He could check other places, but the pocket universe was never supposed to be moved. There were a couple of others; the underworld being the most notable, but Olympus was the most important one. They wouldn’t move it.
Prometheus spun around, sensing a divinity appearing behind him. It was a goddess, with their typically vain physical embodiment. You’d think they’d realize at some point that their bodies being only an image they choose to project that there was no point to looks. They could look like nearly anything.
This one had chosen to appear rather Nordic, with golden hair and a slim tall figure. He recognized her spirit though.
“It has been a very long time Eris.”
“Not long enough I think. Aren’t you supposed to be chained to a mountain somewhere?” she claimed caustically.
“I was let go for good behavior. Mind telling me where everyone is? I’m in the mood for a good party.”
“Don’t worry. You’ll be seeing them soon.”
“Oh, they put Olympus on a time lock or something?” Prometheus wondered. Eris was muttering to herself now.
“…power to smash even the souls of the gods, Ragna Blade!” shouted Eris as a blade of pure chaos erupted within her hand.
Prometheus raised an eyebrow.
“You’ll meet them very soon, hah hahaha!” Eris shouted and dashed towards him.
Thirty seconds later Prometheus was sitting on Eris’ back with her pinned to the ground.
“Did you really expect that to work?” Prometheus shook his head sadly. “I’ll admit that against almost anything that attack would be extremely lethal. But I was born before entropy was established as a rule. That attack can't affect me.”
“It worked well enough to off the other gods,” Eris muttered.
“Oh come off it, it may have worked on some of them, but quite a few would have been as resistant as I was. Which reminds me, what was with the incantation: I know that you weren’t actually drawing on any other power and could have used that with a mere thought.”
Eris slumped a little, ceasing her struggles. “I’m bored out of my mind okay!” she whined like a little girl. “You have no idea how boring it’s been without anyone else around. Sure it was great fun for a few centuries, no one to stop me from doing whatever I please, but after a while with no one able to do anything to stop me…” Eris was sobbing now.
Prometheus rolled his eyes. “It figures,” he muttered before continuing in a louder voice, “Yeah, so sad that no one is able to do anything about you toppling civilizations.”
“I know, it’s like they don’t even care!” Eris complained.
“So where did the other gods go and why leave you here?”
“Heh hehe, about that…” Eris started hesitantly. “It is kind of my fault I suppose, but it was just supposed to be a joke.”
“Eris…” Prometheus growled ominously.
“I kind of… sort of… usedmychaosbladetocuttheanchorbetweenOlympusandthemountain,” Eris finished lamely.
“I didn’t think that could stop them from just reattaching it, or bailing out. And what about the gods that don’t live in Olympus?” Prometheus didn’t think such a tactic would do anything.
“I thought they would too, you know. I figured it would be a laugh watching them all bail like rats off a sinking ship. No one did though,” Eris started jovially, but ended on a sad note.
“That still doesn’t explain where the other gods are, like Poseidon, or Hades. Why haven’t they done something?”
“Everyone was in Olympus, and I mean everyone. It was a pair of parties to end all parties. Zeus and Hera had finally gotten divorced and they were both throwing the greatest parties ever seen before or since, and kept trying to outdo each other. I think Zeus even sent you an invitation,” Eris explained. "Zeus was acting like it was the greatest day in, well, ever!"
“Yeah, I remember that now. Hermes showed up and dropped off the invitation to the party of the millennium and didn’t let me out of my chains, bastard.”
“Everyone was totally drunk and having a great time, except me,” Eris cried again.
“Yes, yes, it is so sad that you cannot enjoy the benefits of alcohol like the rest of us because your body breaks it down too rapidly,” Prometheus did kind of feel bad about that, but better her than him.
“So, I figured I'd get back at them all for having so much fun when I couldn’t,” Eris continued in a clearer voice, though Prometheus heard her mutter, “Hades is so grabby as a drunk, and he’s supposed to be married.”
“And so you figured you’d ruin the party for everyone by detaching Olympus. Whatever happened to subtlety?”
“Look where that got me with the apple of discord… oh wait you weren’t there for that one. Well you see-“
“Focus,” Prometheus cut her off, knowing that she could be talking for hours if he let her. “Odds are good that by the time you left everyone was so drunk that they didn’t even notice what you did and only sobered up days, or maybe weeks later. The party probably kept going not even noticing what you’d done.”
“No one appreciates me anymore!” Eris whined again.
Prometheus rolled his eyes and continued. “By the time they sobered up they probably couldn’t figure out how to get back to this universe. Mystery solved. I don’t know what I’m going to do about it though. Do I even care about them?” Prometheus thought about it for a moment: “Not that bastard Hermes, that’s for sure! I did have some good times with Athena though. Zeus had a right to be mad I guess. I suppose I need to think this over for a while.”
Eris was still softly crying. Prometheus was getting a bit annoyed. “Why are you so whiny these days? You used to be so happy; crazy and annoying maybe, but fun too.”
“You have no idea what it’s like being so bored for a millennium. My last good fun was the fall of the Roman Empire!”
Prometheus just stared at her with such malevolent eyes that it chilled her very soul.
“Okay… so maybe you do understand what it’s like to be bored for a millennium,” Eris corrected herself, “but I haven’t had sex in even longer!”
Prometheus just stared at her. He should have been angry, as obviously he had suffered the same issue, but he was honestly too curious at this point as to why she was abstinent. She hadn’t been that promiscuous before, but she wasn’t a virgin either. “Why not?”
“It isn’t for lack of trying!” Eris shouted. “It’s just that every time I try, the guy sort of… suffers heat death before I can get off,” Eris was looking rather pathetic at this point. “I mean even when I pose as some legendary heroic figure’s lover they always die too fast. You’re supposed to be a legend, have some damned stamina!” Eris continued on into details, but Prometheus tuned her out.
This was a bit more morbid than Prometheus wanted to know about. He just stood up and started to walk away, he had no desire to hear more about Eris’ lethal failed attempts at sex.
Eris stopped speaking as he got off her. She sat up, and hung her head gloomily, boredom and frustration already setting in again. Then she had an idea and brightened. “Wait up!” She stood and ran to where Prometheus had stopped. “Since you and I are all alone now… and have so much in common, I was thinking maybe… we could get together?”
Prometheus stared at her for a moment, and couldn’t help but look her over. He wasn’t the Zeus, who needed a new girl every night, but… it had been an even longer time for him than for her. Plus, just an image or not, she was very hot, and who didn’t want a girl that literally could not cheat on him with anyone else. “Sure, why don’t you show me your place.”
"Yeah, best party in history, even Bacchus can admit that!"
"...anyone remember where we parked the mountain?"
Read the comments on this episode
(Posted Thu, 19 Feb 2009 21:52)
Questions? Problems? Suggestions?
Send a mail to addventure@bast-enterprises.de
or use the contact form.
らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
All other series and their characters are © by their respective creators or owners. No claims of ownership of these characters are implied by the authors of this Addventure, or should be inferred.
The Anime Addventure is a non-profit site.