“WAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!”
*click*
The two sounds were simultaneous, and both music to Ryoga’s ears. He turned partially to look at his ‘wife’ and grinned.
”Hey Ranma, you look just lovely in white. It really suits you, you know. Think the photographer will give out copies?”
A wet, bedraggled and very male Ranma stood, growling, facing Ryoga, a wet bouquet of silk flowers in one hand, the other balled into a fist. “Why I oughta…” he broke off, tea dripping down his hair, onto the dress and into the neckline. “It doesn’t even fit anymore!” he finished, looking down at the mess he was in. He’d have to go change, and quickly.
Ryoga wasn’t the only one who was taking his time looking at Ranma. *Well, he’s right about that.* he thought. The dress, which had fit Ranma-chan so well, was now just stretched tightly across Ranma-kun’s chest, clearly defining his musculature underneath, and the tea hadn’t helped, by just dampening the fabric, it made it nearly see-through. Ryoga heard more than one feminine sigh behind him, and at first wondered why, but as he looked farther down, the dress also defined other parts of his anatomy that would definitely be popular with the girls in Furinkan High. It was also several inches too short, and stopped almost at the knee. Ryoga had to admit, the guy had nice looking calves.
Suddenly, he shook his head, clearing it of thoughts. *What was he doing? This was his most hated rival, Ranma Saotome, and he was just assessing him like a piece of meat. It must have been left over from seeing Ranma-chan in the dress.* “Need to change, Saotome? Or is that what you just did?”
Ranma straightened up, ignoring the sighs and fluttery looks he got and said “If you’ll excuse me, I’ll be right back.” and headed off to the boys bathroom, the veil fluttering along behind him. Ryoga called out mockingly “So which one will it be, Ranma? Girls room or Boys?”
As soon as he got out of sight of Ryoga and the peanut gallery, Ranma hiked up the pouffy skirts of the wedding dress and ran for it. He quickly skidded to a stop when he saw Nabiki hiding in a janitor’s closet, a bucket in hand, waving him over.
”Oh my, Ranma, that certainly is attractive.” Nabiki eyed him, grinning. “It looks like you’re in need of this.” and she waved the bucket in front of his face.
”Yes yes yesyesyes! Quick! I’ve got to get back in time for the cutting of the cake. I don’t want to fail. No
”Hold on. First, what’s in it for me? I mean, I’ve got to get something out of helping you in this time of need…again.” Nabiki replied.
Ranma thought. “Can I teach you any martial arts techniques? Help with homework? Act the bodyguard?”
”Um…nope, nope and nope. Why don’t we say that you just
Ranma wasn’t sure of what he was getting himself into, but he agreed. Nabiki upended the bucket on Ranma-kun’s head, and in an instant, Ranma-chan was there, fitting the dress much better, though certainly much wetter than before.
Nabiki tossed a towel at her. “Here, use this for now to get the worst off. You’ll just have to air dry.” *And in the meantime, give the boys at Furinkan High the best show they’ve had.* she thought to herself.
Ranma patted herself down and dried her hair best she could, but the dress was beyond help. “Oh well, it’s only for the day, I guess. Thanks, Nabiki. Glad you were there to help.” Ranma waved and left the janitor’s closet and headed back to the auditorium where the “festivities” were commencing.
Unluckily for Ranma-chan, who should be walking down the hallway at that exact moment but Kuno.
”Ah, my pig-tailed Goddess, I see that you have finally come to your senses and are coming to me. Yes! Yes, I shall date with thee!” Kuno ran towards her, his arms outstretched, face contorted into one of unholy glee. With a shriek, Ranma-chan turned tail and ran.
Ryoga was getting desperate. He kept getting warning glances from the teacher that if his “wife” wasn’t back soon they’d both flunk, and he certainly didn’t want to take the Ichinose Summer School Marriage Make Up Course, but if he moved from the exact spot he was standing, he was sure he’d never find this place again.
Luckily for Ryoga, it was at that moment that Ranma returned, in a form that went with the dress she was wearing. Ryoga stared, for it was clinging to her body as if it were see-through spandex. He didn’t have much time to register his thoughts though, because unluckily, right behind Ranma came Kuno, still spouting bad verse intermixed with offers to date her.
Ranma entered the auditorium, saw Ryoga and made a beeline for him. She stood behind him, using him as a shield, and said “You’re my husband, right? Well, protect me!”
Ryoga felt every bit of Ranma pressed into his back, and added that to his new mix of emotions, but nodded and stepped forward. “Kuno!” he called out.
Kuno heard Ranma’s comment to Ryoga and gasped. “No, pig-tailed girl! Say it isn’t so! Say that you have not given your heart to this one!” Kuno pointed his bokken disdainfully at Ryoga.
Ranma blinked, then looked at Kuno. “What the…?”
Ryoga glared at Kuno “How dare you insult her like that! She can give her heart to anyone she wants to, me included!”
(Posted Thu, 27 Mar 2003 06:56)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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