BZNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!!
Sakura came to groggily, feeling a strange craving for mochi as she flailed weakly at the alarm clock. "Bleah... hate... early shift," she complained muzzily. "No one else... up so (yawn) early..." Yawning again, she stretched out, then wandered toward the bathroom and its shower, grabbing the outfit she'd laid out on her dresser the night before as she passed. She just hoped she had time for a shower long enough to wash away the tension of a restless night, she thought, subconsciously adding a bit of extra sway in her hips.
In a small, uncluttered bedroom of the Hyuuga compound, the young heiress to the Head Family snuggled happily into her pillow. She wrapped her legs more firmly around the rolled lump her blankets had become, a soft sigh passing her lips. "Naruto-kun... Mmm, more... Sakura-chan, your tongue..." she mumbled.
Somewhere near the border of Grass and Wind, Jiraya brushed back his bushy white hair and grinned, loosing a somewhat disturbing giggle. He decided to let his apprentice sleep just a LITTLE longer - it would be a shame to disrupt such obviously pleasant dreams, after all, not when he knew how much having that happen irritated himself. Besides, he had a marvelous idea for the next scene he was writing and had to get it into his notes.
After Sakura had finished her shift at the hospital that morning she'd reported in to Tsunade for the day's training - the usual round of control exercises and practice with healing ninjutsu on wounded animals or stranded fish - followed by extra book work in a corner of the Hokage's office when her chakra ran low, all to prepare for the next chuunin exam, soon to be held in the Leaf again. That's where she was as evening drew nigh and teams began to report in about the day's missions, not exactly in the forefront but not in any way hidden, and not so occupied that she didn't look up and exchange pleasantries with the shinobi she knew.
Things became odd when Team 8 came in to report. Shino and Kiba greeted her normally enough, but Hinata froze in place as soon as Sakura called out a greeting. A blush painted her cheeks as she meekly replied, "Hello, Sakura-ch-san..." Then the young Hyuuga practically lit up in red, even her hands pinkish as she covered her face and fled out the door.
Bemused, Sakura turned to the girl's team mates and wondered, "What was that about? She was never even that shy around Naruto, and the only one who doesn't know how she feels about him is the baka himself. Hasn't she gotten a lot better anyway, the past couple of years?"
Her team mates could only shrug and wonder, before getting back to their report. Kiba did worry a bit, though - why had he suddenly got a whiff of Hinata's blood?
By midafternoon, Naruto had become thoroughly annoyed with Jiraya. Not that that was all that unusual, for all the man had come to be something like a weird uncle the old letch was still possibly the most irritating person he'd ever met - even including Sasuke and Naruto himself, who took pride in his ability to drive people completely insane with taunting and practical jokes. The latter skill had turned out to translate nicely into the setting of less playful traps as well, but that wasn't the point.
The point was, Jiraya was 'researching' with his spyglass, again, while leaving Naruto to do 'advanced control exercises.' Again. As if adding more and more layers and directions of spin to a Rasengan was all that hard - he was over 5000, already, and could add three or four more within the charging time limit with every attempt. Sure, the resulting beach-ball-sized sphere could leave an impressive crater, and he'd seen Jiraya make one that was bigger around than he was tall which had destroyed and entire bandit king's fort in one shot, but aside from taijutsu training and filling in some of the holes his Academy instructors before Iruka had never even bothered to try to correct in his basic knowledge and tactical sense, the only additions to his arsenal were a few ero-jutsu, mostly Oiroke variations.
"'On his own, an idiot like you will only come up with more perverted jutsu,'" he sneered, mocking the words Jiraya had used to persuade him to come on this trip. "Dammit, Ero-sennin! You're supposed to teach me a bunch of cool ninjutsu, not the same old thing over and over!"
"Ah, give it a rest, brat, I've taught you lots of stuff," the Toad Hermit replied distractedly, before giggling at something the girls he was watching did.
Letting his most recent oversized Rasengan dissipate (relatively) gently the blond teen planted his hands on his hips and glared. "Well let's count up: Katon ninjutsu, nothing. Raiton ninjutsu, nothing. Fuuton ninjutsu, nothing! Suiton ninjutsu, NOTHING! Doton ninjutsu, NOTHING! Sounds like lots of nothing to me!"
"Ungrateful brat! I gave you that kinjutsu, didn't I? Your foundation skills and control were so weak anything else would be a waste, and they're barely getting up to standards now," Jiraya grumped, dipping his brush in an inkpot and scribbling some notes blindly with the ease of long practice.
"Kinjutsu? All you did was mess with the seal so it's easier to let out that fox bastard's chakra, and you did that the first week! Most of the time since then was just fixing the control that screwed up!" Naruto accused. "And since you keep driving strategy into my head and 'a berserker in battle is most dangerous to himself' that kinjutsu is worthless! It's worse, because if I start to get even a little angry, that chakra can start to come out and screw me up even more! Goddamn, Ero-sennin! I should have just ignored your ancient ass and stayed with Sakura-chan and Kakashi-sensei!"
Even now, his pupils had sharpened, and the irises were beginning to bleed to purple. Hearing the venom and guttural tones in his student's voice, the old sage looked up from his peeping, cursed, and whipped out a seal tag, which he quickly charged and slapped onto Naruto's abdomen to disrupt and shut down the demonic chakra.
"Ungrateful!" he repeated. "So, you admit you weren't ready for my teaching? Why should I share any more of my awesome skills with such a disrespectful student?"
"HAH! Why should I bother with such a lazy, no-good, pervert teacher! I made up more jutsu than I learned from you myself!"
"Oh, really? Let's see one of these amazing original jutsu then, and not one of those ero-jutsu since perverts are 'no good,'" Jiraya challenged.
Naruto froze for a moment, wracking his brain for something that qualified. Jiraya quirked an eyebrow and crossed his arms, settling as if to say he could wait all day for an answer.
A fragment of memory appeared, of an ANBU sitting on a shattered rock teaching a secret transportation jutsu. Sure, some of the hand seals were weird, but if they were the usual ones someone else would have discovered it by now, wouldn't they?
Crowing confidently, he bragged, "Okay, Ero-sennin, I'll show you just how awesome I am! I heard the Yondaime Hokage had a kick ass transportation jutsu he made himself, well so do I! I 'm so amazing, I even made it up while I was asleep!"
He molded a good chunk of chakra and began sealing. "Horse, monkey, giraffe, ram, platypus, catfish! Ninpo: Shunkan Idou no jutsu!" he announced, concentrating on his favorite view of Konoha from the top of the Hokage monument, while raising two fingers to his forehead to help focus.
A massive cloud of chakra smoke billowed out around him even as Jiraya dropped his jaw in shock. When it cleared, the ground where the boy had stood was empty...
...because he was lying a few feet away, eyes spinning and barely conscious after the misfired jutsu, a welt already forming on his head where he'd pointed his fingers.
Kicking aside the odd object the jutsu had produced - it was like a plucked fowl ready to roast, but was stiff and fake looking - Jiraya grabbed his idiot apprentice by the shoulders and shook him fiercely.
"MORON!" he berated. "DO YOU WANT TO DIE!? I've told you about why the basic hand seals are what they are, and the theory of how variations and one-hand seals are derived. What were you thinking, making weird stuff like that up!? You're lucky you didn't kill yourself and save Akatsuki the trouble!"
Dropping his godson (not that the kid knew about it, he still couldn't keep his mouth shut and the last thing he needed were his father's enemies to add to his own) Jiraya turned away to get himself under control, and spotted the failed jutsu's strange product again. "What the hell is this thing, anyway?" he muttered, picking it up and poking it experimentally. "Looks like a fake chicken made out of rubber."
He poked it a few more times, then tried cutting it open with a kunai. Another cloud of chakra smoke filled the area with a bang, leaving Jiraya knocked down beside his apprentice as the densely packed chakra construct was disrupted.
(Posted Thu, 27 Aug 2009 21:45)
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