(Writer's Note: With apologies to Gordon Lightfoot. G.)
"So you've got no real idea who created you or why, right?" Ranma blinks.
"Not to mention who it was that killed all our friends and brought us here?" Ataru adds.
"Affirmative," the "Ship" -- actually, it's main computer -- replies. The Saotomes and the Moroboshis had just finished an hour-long question-and-answer session to better ascertain what happened to them. "I truly wish I can be of more assistance to all of you."
"Well, at least you're being truthful about what's going on here," Tariko sighs. In truth, neither she, her brother or the Saotomes had any real means to ascertain if the computer was lying, but it seemed prudent to keep things civil.
"Not to mention providing us with a place to stay," Kikuko adds. "I can just imagine what people back home are thinking."
"Easy to guess what they'd say, eh, sis?" Ataru stares at Tariko.
"Got that right," she snorts, then launches into a mock-cheer. "YAY!!!! MOROBOSHI'S DEAD FINALLY!!! LET'S CELEBRATE!!!" She then switches into a burbling moan. "Oh, it's so TRAGIC!!! Lum-chan's DEAD!!!!" Into an angry sneer. "ATARU, IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!"
"You're shitting us, right?" Kikuko blinks.
"What do you think?" Tariko rolls her eyes.
"What about what people in Nerima might think?" Ataru gazes on Ranma.
He shrugs. "Hard to predict, man."
"Relax, Nii-chan. I'll answer this one," Kikuko cuts in, then gazes on Ataru. "The girls'll all go crazy because Nii-chan's gone. The boys'll all go crazy because I -- as Nii-chan's cursed form, by the way -- am gone. The nuts who followed Kunou'll be sad that Akane's bit the big one. Tsubasa Kurenai -- he's this cross-dressing jerk who loves to disguise himself -- well, he'll be mad about what happened to Kuonji and blame it on Nii-chan. Akari'll be upset about Hibiki. The old ghoul -- Shampoo's great-grandmother -- well, she'll be pretty upset too about losing both Shampoo AND Nii-chan..." she shrugs. "Some'll blame it on Nii-chan, others won't."
"Lucky you," Tariko smirks, then gazes at Ataru. "Hey, Nii-chan, do you think anyone'll miss you?"
"Me?" Ataru blinks, then hums. "Well, the only one I can think of is Tampopo-chan."
"Tampopo?" the Saotomes ask together.
"Tampopo Kamekichi," Tariko provides. "Runs a ramen/beefbowl stand in the Ginza. Our favourite place to eat, not to mention avoiding Lum when we weren't in the mood to put up to any of her crap."
"Pity we couldn't..." Ataru's voice stops, then he looks up. "Hey, Ship!"
"Yes, Atari?"
"Where the hell ARE we, anyway?! Close to Earth?!"
An amused chuckle. "I was wondering when you were going to ask that!"
Everyone exchanges looks, then fall over laughing...
They learn where they are and find themselves...
(Posted Sun, 19 Jan 2003 03:10)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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