"Yeah, that's the message I got too," admitted Naruto.
"So, you suppose it's about 'teamwork' again?" asked Sasuke.
"Okay," said Naruto. "Wait a minute. Where's Sakura?"
Sasuke frowned, scratched his head, and then looked around. "Wasn't she just here a minute ago?"
"Hmmmm," said Naruto. "I don't think so. She's usually early though."
"Hnnn," grunted Sasuke.
"Let's just try this," said Naruto, touching his eyelids. "Detect Enemies."
Sasuke blinked as Naruto's eyes briefly glowed.
"BACK TO BACK!" growled Naruto in a commanding voice, shifting so his back was towards Sasuke.
Sasuke discovered he'd moved and was now back to back with the taller Naruto before he'd even registered that he was moving. "What are-"
"We're surrounded," said Naruto. "In the trees, sixteen of them. One at ground level."
"Enemy ninja?" asked Sasuke.
"All 'Detect Enemies' does is tell me that they're enemies and where they are," said Naruto, who hadn't bothered with Mitternacht yet. "Let's just put a little light on the subject, shall we?"
Sasuke heard the suggestion and went through hand-signs quickly. "Fire Release: Fireball Jutsu!"
"Fireball!" cast Naruto.
"YAGH!" yelled a feminine voice as someone stumbled out of the explosion. "Careful fools, you'll incinerate this child."
"Naruto," said Sasuke carefully. "A spider the size of a small cart just lowered a large coccoon down out of the tree. A coccoon with pink hair sticking up out of the top."
"I kinda figured," said Naruto. "Just one question."
"What is it, Naruto Uzumaki? Think well, for it is your last words in this life," said the woman.
"Who ARE you?" asked Naruto.
"Guk," said the woman, nearly falling over. "You... your sense of humor will not save you!"
"You weren't joking, were you?" asked Sasuke, still standing back to back with Naruto and therefore away from the enemy.
"Uhm, no. Really. Do I know you?" asked Naruto.
"Ack," said the woman, then drew herself up. "I am the one you humiliated! The one you wronged with your unfair battle tactics!"
"Ring any bells yet?" asked Sasuke.
"Uhm, no. Want to switch around? Maybe you know her?" asked Naruto.
"I'm pretty sure I don't know anyone who has pet attack spiders," said Sasuke.
"You- you're not kidding?" asked the woman. "How could you forget Lieutenant Hilda 'Arachne' Fontana!"
Naruto was silent.
"Still no bells?" asked Sasuke.
"Nope," admitted Naruto. "Not a one."
"I was rescued by the TSAB and I told them I was an old friend of yours! They helped me to track you down!" said Arachne. "Now I and my friends will feast on your bones!"
"Why?" asked Naruto. "I'm pretty sure I haven't met you before."
"ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Arachne. "New Amsterdam! The Hayloft!"
"What's a hayloft?" asked Sasuke.
"It's a building where they store hay for animal fodder," said Naruto. "It's also a waterfront bar in New Amsterdam which was a nation of the Defensive Union. There was a minor skirmish there. I remember there was some guy with zombies."
"And there was myself!" said Arachne, "coming ashore with my beauties."
"You were on that ship I blew up?" asked Naruto.
"Yes! You blew up my ship while I was still in the middle of my Introductory Speech with Appropriate Death Threats!"
"Ohhhhh," said Naruto, slapping a fist into an upturned palm. "You must have been the crazy gal giving a speech during that attack."
"What?" asked Arachne.
"I couldn't even hear your speech," said Naruto. "All those zombies running around, screeching and hissing and all that. So I just used a quick spell to keep the reinforcements from landing."
"YES! And now I have tracked you here to kill you!" declared Arachne. "You don't dare use your strange magicks while I have this innocent child hostage!"
"Okay, now I understand," said Naruto, nodding once. "Mitternacht."
[Active. Setup. Targets Locked.]
Naruto smiled.
"Kill the hostage if he moves!" said Arachne.
"Time Stop," cast Naruto.
"So... did something happen?" asked Kakashi, four hours later when he finally showed up to administer the test.
Naruto glanced at Sasuke. Sasuke shrugged.
"Not much," said Naruto.
"Why are there spider webs thicker than a finger between the trees? Why are there scorch marks everywhere? Where is Sakura? Why are there dead spiders the size of a cow being carted off by ANBU?" asked Kakashi.
"We filed a report with the Hokage already," said Naruto.
Sasuke nodded.
"Let me try again," said Kakashi. "Did something happen here?"
Naruto looked at Sasuke. Sasuke rolled his eyes. Naruto shrugged.
"Okay, basically, someone with more grudge than sense tracked me down and got ready to feed Sakura to a bunch of giant spiders," said Naruto. "I used a technique that speeds me up to the point where it looks like time is stopped around me. Which, by the way, wears the body out really fast. We took the prisoner to the Hokage to report this, Sakura to the hospital to have the poison sucked out she got before we ever showed up."
"Brilliant job that was," said Sasuke.
"Oh yeah, she did a very good job as the hostage," said Naruto. "Nice and quiet. You didn't have to suggest leaving her in there though."
"I just wanted to get one to go after Ino, she's even more loud and annoying," grumped Sasuke.
"Well, then I killed all of them except for three of the giant spiders and their leader. HER I simply broke both of her arms so she couldn't do any jutsu," said Naruto. "Told her if she resisted arrest I'd turn her over to Sasuke, who has a MUCH more vindictive nature than I do."
"EVERYONE has a more vindictive nature than you do," said Sasuke. "We played 'good ninja, bad ninja' on her."
"You did very well at that, by the way," said Naruto.
Sasuke smiled ever so slightly at that and inclined his head.
"You said there were three of these spiders left alive?" asked Kakashi.
"They surrendered," said Naruto. "Summoned hirelings. They had different markings than the rest and weren't directly menacing us. Just hired muscle, sort of. Sasuke came off the best of that."
Sasuke's smile turned up a notch. "Summoning contract, limited one but still."
"I think they liked your style with Arachne there," said Naruto. "Still, it's something to work on with your chakra and control there."
"Well, if Sakura's not here, then how am I supposed to test you?" asked Kakashi.
"Oh, you're not," said Naruto. "Since we brought the prisoners and the report by, we've had six jonin request being our team leader."
"Three of them are jonin-rank who'd leave ANBU to be our sensei," said Sasuke, who seriously considered high-fiving Naruto at the reminder but decided that wasn't cool or brooding enough. And he DID like going for the cool/brooding look.
"Oh," said Kakashi.
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(Posted Mon, 21 Jun 2010 05:24)
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