"No, I haven't seen That Boy, and good riddance. He's been missing two days now. Probably off getting into trouble."
"I see," said the ANBU with the falcon mask. "And you don't think it's any problem that a six-year-old hasn't been in his room for two days?"
"No," said the matron. "Why? You can't do anything to me, I'm a civilian and doing my job and-"
"FALCON CHOP!"
"Y-y-you HIT me! On the top of my head!"
"I only did a Falcon Chop, which is the weakest attack I have. You will survive."
"What do you... ohhhh what pretty colors." THUD!
"Now," said the ANBU known as Falcon, "to see what else is going on here."
"So," said the Hokage. He didn't know that in this timeline, a second survivor of Orochimaru's experiments had been added. Simply an idle nudge just to see if this minor twist would add anything new.
"Indeed," said Falcon.
"Graft, corruption, misappropriated supplies," said the Hokage. "Looks like you found everything but Naruto."
"I am greatly sorry, Hokage-sama," said Falcon.
"So... where could Naruto have vanished?" asked the Hokage.
two days previously:
"So, what's your name?" asked Naruto.
The little orange jewel flickered with light, forming letters on its surface as its voice spoke.
[Jack]
"Huh, that's a funny name," commented the kid, pulling the gem out of the ground. "A talking orange rock is kinda funny though too."
The rock glimmered a couple of times in his hands. [Chakra reservoir sufficient. Chakra capacity insufficient.]
"What's that mean?" asked Naruto.
[You have a large chakra reservoir, but your ability to access and control that access is insufficient for full activation.]
"You sound like a teacher," said Naruto.
[Correct. Profession: Teacher.]
"Oh? So what can you teach me? Some awesome jutsu?" asked Naruto.
[Again. Correct.]
"Wait a minute, seriously?" asked Naruto.
[This unit's primary purpose is as a teacher.]
"So teach me an awesome jutsu!" said Naruto.
[You are incapable of learning jutsu of level: awesome at current time.]
"What? What a gyp."
[Incorrect. Student must learn beginning steps, then intermediate steps, then advanced.]
"Eh?"
[Before one learns to run, one must learn to walk.]
"Oh," said Naruto. "One of those 'hard work' thingies then."
[Correct.]
"Then we need to get started," said Naruto.
[Very well. First to work on control and purification.]
three days later:
"Uzumaki's been located," said Falcon, settling into place before the Hokage's desk.
"Oh? Where did you find him?" asked the Hokage.
"The Forest Of Death," said the ANBU.
"He's dead?" asked the Hokage, gaze darkening.
"No, actually he's apparently been surviving there working on stealth skills and chakra control," said Falcon. "I had no idea the child was both that skilled and that clumsy at surviving in hostile environs."
"Neither did I," said the Hokage. "You're sure of this?"
"I investigated, there is no sign of anyone else near his camp, and he has apparently survived for two days without assistance. He shows technical knowledge but no practical experience."
"That's unexpected," admitted the Hokage. "Who's watching him now?"
"Dog," answered Falcon.
"Interesting," mused the Hokage. "How did he even know about the Forest, much less know how to survive in it?"
"That's not the only curious thing," said Falcon. "From what I've observed, he is currently working on:"
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(Posted Sat, 08 Oct 2011 18:26)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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