It was a dark and stormy night. No, not really. It was actually summer, early afternoon, one of those unusually temperate days when the mornings are brisk and the evenings are warm. Rather pleasant, all things considered.
Unless you're a thrice-cursed martial artist named Ranma Saotome. Because on this particular day, well, things were going…badly. "What do you mean we're going on a trip?"
Genma smiled triumphantly. "Right here, Ranma!" He slammed a newspaper onto the table.
Ranma raised an eyebrow even as his stomach sank. Every time his father read something new and turned it into a training exercise, Ranma ended up cursed somehow. Or got an extra fiancée, which was usually worse. You'd think after nearly marrying Akane Genma would have given up the old scheme, but no the old panda kept selling Ranma's hand like it came from Midas himself. Then Akane would throw a fit, Ukyo wouldn't talk to him, and Shampoo would try to maim the new girl only to be thwarted by Kodachi trying to poison the lot of them. And then the suitors…and the rivals…and then he'd have a few days of normalcy before oyaji had a new idea.
Whatever the case, there was no way he could try to fight it if he didn't know what "it" was. Ranma looked at the article. "Uh…'Famous American explorer discovers ancient ruins in mountains.' Why exactly should we care?"
"Foolish boy!" Genma snapped. "We can't let some American girl steal ancient martial arts secrets!"
Because you want first crack at them, Ranma thought sourly. "And what makes you think there are martial arts secrets to find?"
"Ancient ruins always have martial arts secrets," Genma proclaimed.
Ranma thought that over for a moment and shrugged. Oyaji had a point. Anything older than a few years had some connection to the Art in his experience. And while Genma was probably thinking of scrolls and trophies that could be sold, Ranma had his own interest in learning new moves and adding them to his skills. "I guess this means we have a training trip," he sighed. "I'll go tell Akane." He headed to the dojo.
As anyone familiar with Nerima could testify, Ranma Saotome's love life was a nasty piece of work. Over the year of his life at the Tendo estate, his relationship with Akane Tendo had had more ups and downs than the most suicidal rollercoaster ever dredged from the lunacy of engineer kind. Not two weeks ago, however, the infamous failed wedding had broken a dam between the two. No one was exactly sure what would go on between the two now, but one thing was certain. Things would never be the same again.
The other fiancées were still reeling from the blow. Kodachi had shown up on the Tendo grounds no less than four times to rescue her Ranma-sama from the wicked Akane. Akane Airlines made a brisk business deporting her back to the delusions she came from. Shampoo was simply staying away. The only time they saw her was when she was out on a ramen delivery, and even Ranma wasn't so oblivious to miss the red eyes and tear-streaked makeup on her usually pretty face. As for Ukyo, she had come by a few days later with a family sized offering of okonomiyaki and the one thing that Ranma had never expected: a genuine apology. She wasn't giving up the fight, but she admitted that hurling exploding food at her friends was a mistake.
Kuno, Mousse, and the menagerie of other fools in the twisted game called love had taken no notice of recent events and carried on, situation normal.
The only one who had truly moved on was Ryoga, who still showed up as P-chan when he got lost but spent most of his romantic efforts courting Akari. And his unromantic efforts were the same as ever – the battle for Akane's heart may have been settled, but thanks to Ranma, Ryoga had still seen hell. At least, according to Ryoga. Ranma privately believed that the Lost Boy had taken a wrong turn and simply missed the big gates reading Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here.
But for all the uncertainty in the air, one simple fact stood out as the most disturbing to those who sought the hand of either heir to Musabetsu Kakuto.
Ranma was training Akane.
Ranma walked into the dojo and smiled slightly. Akane was running a kata. "Good form, Akane, but you need to speed it up if you want to ever hit anything."
Akane took a few moments to respond, finishing her somewhat leisurely kata with a kick that Ranma was well aware could turn rocks into dust. "I can't hit hard enough if I go faster," she complained.
Ranma sighed and shook his head. Akane's conditioning was at least as good as anyone else in the martial madness of their lives, except for Ranma, Ryoga, and maybe Shampoo. Her skill in the Tendo School was equally impressive. However, Akane lacked three important things. Her basic forms were a mess, she had no idea how to evade or take a hit, and her confidence was all but nonexistent. It had taken Ranma a month to convince her that Kuno had never held back against her, and that was after dealing with that cheerleading mess. "You're using too much power, Akane," he said calmly. "Save those strikes for breaking down walls, not fighting."
Akane sighed. "I know," she mumbled. "Are we going to spar?"
Ranma smiled a bit more at the tone in his fiancée's voice. She wanted it, but she was scared of it too. "Ya know I don't like hittin' ya, Akane."
Akane rolled her eyes. "I'm a martial artist, Ranma," she scolded. "I throw away any right to be protected when I attack you." As Ranma taught Akane, so was Akane teaching Ranma. His idiot father had put some really weird ideas in his head about girls, and she had to get them out for both of their sakes.
"Yeah, but you ain't attacking and I ain't here to spar. Oyaji found out about some kind of ruins in the mountain. And if I'm going on a training trip, you are too."
"What?" Akane yelped, her form going slack all at once. Ranma made a quick note to remind her to keep her guard up. "But…but when!? I have to get packed, tell my friends, sort out school…"
"Ranma!"Genma bellowed from somewhere inside the house. "Where are you? Stop wasting time!"
Ranma rolled his eyes. "I'd say you've got an hour to get cleaned up and ready to go before he tries to drag us out anyway. I'll try and buy you another hour, but I wouldn't count on having a third."
Akane watched Ranma head out to "distract" his father. "Maybe this isn't such a good idea," she muttered.
As it turned out, Akane had a good four hours to get herself ready. Ranma's ability to occupy Genma's head with his fist was part of the delay, but more credit belonged to Akane. She had expertly manipulated the Tendo home in such a way as to enrapture Genma for hours on end.
Namely, she set up the shogi board and placed a (small, cheap) bottle of sake on it.
"You might have gotten a full day out of that if Mr. Tendo was better at cheating," Ranma mused as they left the house.
"Maybe," Akane agreed. "Say, Ranma?"
"Un?"
"Why is my pack so light?" Ranma had packed their supplies himself. Genma, for once, had the heaviest pack. Ranma carried everything that had enough value that it would be worth pawning. That left Akane with little other than her personal survival gear.
Ranma grinned. "Well, oyaji and I talked that over. Carrying a heavy pack is good training, but you don't really need that kind of training."
Akane had a sinking feeling that this was going to go badly. "So, I don't do any training at all as we walk?"
"That's right," Genma agreed. "Because we're not walking."
"Jogging?" Akane asked.
Ranma pointed to the rooftops. "Today, you start your roofhopping sessions."
Akane whimpered slightly.
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(Posted Sun, 05 Feb 2012 15:39)
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