Shampoo didn't really know what was going on. Ranma was cursed to turn into a cat, like her, but different. It could bring them together. Except the kitchen destroyer was more like Ranma, too. Great-grandmother talked about werecreatures, which Shampoo only remembered from the old stories, the one she didn't really pay attention to. And now she wasn't married to her husband. And then Spatula Girl showed up and Ranma turned into a half-cat. And now the stupid stick boy was here.
Shampoo dropped into a crouch, wild eyes locked with the delusional Kuno male's.
She knew how to handle stupid stick boy, at least.
Kuno grinned. “You are the whore to this demon!? Truly the Heavens have blessed me, their champion, to strike you both down!” He charged Shampoo with a flurry of strikes. “Be warned, devil-harlot! I won't let you date me, even if you win!”
Shampoo was put off for a moment when she recognized that Stick Boy had evolved into Sword Boy, but he still hadn't been trained worth a damn by Amazon standards. She stepped inside his reach with casual ease and brought the palm of her hand into contact with his chin. Kuno went flying.
Koachi didn't pay attention to the fight between Kuno and Shampoo, instead squaring off against the true corrupter of her Ranma-sama. “Tendo Akane,” she drawled in her formal tones, “I will give you a moment to make peace with your ancestors.”
Akane grinned ferally. “You think you can take me?”
Kodachi spun her ribbon around her and grabbed one end, holding it taught and easily seen. The pale blue gleamed a faint, wet green under the restaurant lights. “Your corruption ends today.”
Ranma took a step forward. He didn't know what that poison was, but it was too much! Cologne's staff stopped him. He turned to look at the miniature elder. She stood beside him, looking at both the battle of flashing steel and the prebattle of ribbon and poison. “A master never interferes in his disciple's fight,” she admonished.
Ranma blinked repeatedly. “But I'm...”
“Not a master?” Cologne asked. “Maybe not by the terms of those fools you called masters. But it is the skill you have and the role you chose. I'm afraid that training is the easy part, Ranma.”
Ranma looked at the fight as Kodachi finally made her move against Akane. The poisoned ribbon hit nothing but air; Akane jumped back a step and then charged in close before Kodachi could overcome the momentum of her impractical weapon. “I can't just do nothing,” he moaned.
“That is exactly what you must do if she is to grow,” Cologne said sympathetically. “Even if she loses. Even if she is injured. Anything less than a killing blow...it is your duty as a martial artist to do nothing.”
“But...I...I...”
“You love her,” Cologne said.
“Erk!”
“Anyone with more sense than these two,” she waved at the Kunos, “could see that. As her fiance your duty is to protect her, naturally.” It wasn't a duty the Amazon people held, but one did not live as long as Cologne without realizing that other cultures had their own norms, at least some of which deserved respect. “So. As a man, what is your duty?”
“I...” Ranma faltered. Akane gave Kodachi a solid hit that sent the gymnast spinning away. It was a mistake to let the range open up, it brought the poison ribbon back into play, but it was still an impressive hit against the more nimble opponent. “I don't...” Ranma muttered.
“What would she want you to do?”
Ranma watched Akane lunge and Kodachi with a flying kick that made use of the open range between them to build up power. It was a slow attack, doomed to miss, then Akane landed in a crouch and her kick became a sweep that sent Kodachi to the floor. Ranma had a moment to see into Akane's eyes as she spun in the execution of her attack.
Ranma smiled slightly. “A master never interferes in his disciple's fight, huh?” he asked bitterly.
“You have chosen to walk a path that is harder than you know,” Cologne said quietly. “But it is worth it in the end.” Satisfied that Ranma could care for the Tendo girl, she turned her full attention to her heir's battle.
It was almost painful to watch. Unlike his sister, Tatewaki never varied his attacks or came from an angle. His was the art of the straight charge. It would make him formidable in a kendo match, pressing his opponent within the rules and limitations of the sport, but in a fight? Shampoo slipped into his reach again and laid him out with a spinning strike to a kidney. Again.
That wasn't why Cologne was worried. No, it was Shampoo's expression. Dead, emotionless. She was fighting because an enemy had shown himself, and for no other reason. She would need days to get over the shock. Cologne was glad Ranma had seen that; it was her plan for it to be so. Akane, too. Shampoo would need Ranma's kindness to be made whole again, whatever form that healing took. Both werecheetahs needed to understand that, so Ranma could suppress his jerk instincts and Akane could suppress her jealousy. Now, all they had to do was deal with the Kunos.
Cologne hadn't counted on two facts. First, plans had a tendency to fall apart around Ranma. Second, Ranma's plans had been going well, so the cosmic balance demanded that something end very, very badly.
Mousse threw his chains. “I'll save you, my Shampoo!”
“Mousse you blind idiot!” Akane raged as she was tied up by a few bolas and heavy chains.
“Now I have you!” Kodachi shrieked. Her ribbon lashed out at the immobilized Akane.
Akane shifted to her hybrid form. Most of the change was hidden by the chains, but there was clearly a lot more under them. Stronger, too, because a few links were already twisting under the strain of Akane pulling at them. But it wasn't going to be fast enough to evade the ribbon.
Ukyo's battle spatula, on the other hand, proved more than capable of intercepting the flimsy weapon. “Love the look, sugar,” the chef drawled. “Why don't you take five and let me play for a bit?”
Kodachi pulled her ribbon back. “You defend the harlot? You hate her as much as I!”
Ukyo took a solid grip on her spatula and assumed a modified guard stance. “Can't say I wouldn't be happy if she dropped out of Ranchan's life,” she admitted.
“Thanks a lot,” Akane muttered, another link giving way. She cursed to herself. How many chains did Mousse throw on her anyway!?
“But she's still my friend,” Ukyo finished.
The silence was broken only by Tatewaki removing himself from a Tatewaki-shaped crater in the ceiling. “I...fight...on...”
Akane stared, her struggles forgotten for a moment. “Eh?”
“You blew up her wedding,” Kodachi pointed out, a rare moment of lucidity breaking the flow of the fight.
“I, uh, I'm not the best friend in the world,” Ukyo admitted.
Kodachi thought that over for a moment. “Whatever.” She lashed out with her ribbon. “You were next anyway! OHHOHOHOHOHO!”
Ukyo smiled and shifted her grip. She swung her spatula in an arc, the flat head swatting the poisoned ribbon up and away. “You think I haven't trained to defeat this attack!?” she yelled. The spatula's momentum pushed her hands into a new grip, which let her check that momentum and swing the weapon up over and down, the bladed edge slicing clean through the ribbon and cutting its length by half. “There! Now, do you surrender or want to make a go of it with your clubs?”
“Look out!” Ranma yelled.
“Huh?” Ukyo asked. “Ow! What?” She looked to her hand and saw that the fluttering, uncontrolled ribon had sliced open her hand...and left a green slick next to the wound. Ukyo's blood ran cold as numbness spread up her arm. She looked at Ranma, terror in her eyes. He seemed...so far away... “Ran...chan?”
“UKYO!” Ranma yelled, catching his oldest friend as she crumpled.
“Ha! One dow-” Kodachi never finished her boast. Akane gave a roar that drowned out all other noise. The chains flew off of her, her ki manifesting, her muscles straining. Which was lost on Kodachi, as it happened too fast for her eyes to follow. All she knew was that the Tendo demon had broken free and then punched her in the chest with enough strength that sent her flying through the (closed) door and off the wall of the building on the far side of the street, where she slid down the wall into a trash heap. She was too unconscious at that point to see the Chinese girl evacuate her brother from the Nekohanten in a similar fashion, using more skill and less strength, thus leaving Tatewaki lying on top of her in an equally unconscious state.
Cologne was a flurry of orders and the eye of the storm all at once. “Mousse, towels and ice. Shampoo, herbs. NABIKI! Third cabinet from the door, the green box! NOW! Ranma, lie Ukyo down on a table. Let the arm dangle. Akane, we need water, cold, lots of it.”
The teenagers were a maelstrom of action while the diminutive elder very carefully gathered the ribbon. Nabiki came out of the kitchen with the right box, which turned out to be a touchstone and vials of fluid. Cologne scraped the ribbon on the stone and applied several vials in turn until the poison turned purple.
Meanwhile, Mousse and Akane had Ukyo shivering in her what they hoped was sleep. She was soaked and freezing. With the bulk of the poison still in her hand, hopefully, and the hypothermia they were inducing, it would hopefully buy them time. Ranma was too busy freaking out, and had Ukyo's other hand in his. He was a moron, but he felt friendships deeply.
Shampoo was last to return. She saw the purple goo on the touchstone and nearly dropped the bag of medicines. “Aiyah,” she whispered.
“That crazy Kuno has gone off the deep end this time,” Cologne grumbled. She looked up and saw Ranma looking at her, pleading for answers. She sighed. “This is...an extremely lethal poison...”
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(Posted Wed, 21 Mar 2012 00:14)
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