"A meeting of such great minds must be toasted," said Jiraiya, raising a tankard.
"What exactly is that?" asked Jiraiya, eyeing the tankard with interest.
"It's called Romulan Ale. Has a bit of a kick to it," said Jiraiya.
"Well, it has been a long and dusty road," noted Jiraiya as he took a seat across from Jiraiya.
"Y-y-you're me?!" practically squeaked Naruto, pointing at himself.
"Looks like it," said Naruto. "Pervy-sage, is this some sort of henge?"
"No," said both Jiraiya. The one that had been seated raised an eyebrow, with the one that had just taken a seat made a passing motion.
The Jiraiya that was wearing an odd camouflage-pattern uniform shrugged and went ahead. "You see, this place is outside of what we normally consider space and time. It's a bubble of both outside of any particular universe."
"Ah," said the other Jiraiya. "That's what that dwarf was saying."
"Exactly," said camo-Jiraiya. "So it's entirely possible to run across one's Analogues in such a location. That is to say - the version of you that was born in another universe and grew up in different circumstances."
"I don't get it," said both Naruto.
"I get it," said Jiraiya. "I've run across these concepts during studies of higher-level fuuinjutsu. Naruto, consider a world where Mizuki died in a mission long before you arrived in the Academy. Now you'd have a different teacher, say..."
"Someone like Tetsuo Hara," supplied the other Jiraiya. "Decent guy. Taijutsu specialist. Has a knack for telling what someone's heart is like."
"Sounds good," agreed the Jiraiya with the Sekirei, making sure to glance back at them so they'd know the explanation was for their sake as well. "So this Hara guy teaches at the Academy instead of Mizuki, and he doesn't screw with you the way Mizuki did. How would your life have been different?"
"Well," said the recently arrived Naruto. "I dunno. If this guy knows taijutsu I expect I'd be better at that, maybe."
"Well, in another universe," said the camo-Jiraiya. "Mizuki did. Tetsuo did. And that maybe happened. And there's a universe out there with a Naruto who did better at taijutsu in the Academy."
"Spock's beard," said Nina.
"Uhm, right," said Jiraiya, deciding to ignore that - even if all the Sekirei were nodding as if that meant something. "So how do we figure out how our universes were different?"
"Compare histories I suppose," said camo-Jiraiya. "How did I end up with so many lovely ladies?"
"Sekirei," said Nina.
"Is that a name, a profession, a musical group...?" asked camo-Jiraiya.
"Ah, that will involve some of these comparing histories," said Jiraiya. "How do we pay for the drinks anyway?"
"We open this, and give an edited version of our mutual stories," said camo-Jiraiya, tapping a black box. "It's tales of daring and adventure, of life and drama, that is the coin used here."
"Well, then between the two of us," said Jiraiya to camo-Jiraiya. "We're most likely rich."
"How do you know all this stuff anyway?" asked Naruto.
"Because, my boy, I am Jiraiya the Gallant!" proclaimed camo-Jiraiya.
"Yeah, sure. No, I mean really," said Naruto.
"Well, as my colleague here noted, higher level fuuinjutsu indicates the possibility of not just the universe we live in, but multiple universes," said camo-Jiraiya. "And I asked the wizard over there."
"Huh?" asked Naruto, looking in the direction the other Jiraiya had indicated. "That bearded guy?"
"His name is Elminster, and he's got a lot of experience with such things apparently," said camo-Jiraiya. "We'll go talk to them later. Apparently there's also a trick to leaving."
"So that's it," said Elminster as the explanations finished. He leaned back in his chair and considered the five women in the back. "Near humans in a battle royal? Sounds like one of those 'Highlander' universes almost."
"I saw those movies!" exclaimed Ikki.
"So my universe differs from HIS universe," said camo-Jiraiya, "in that after my 'Gutsy Ninja' novel failed - I pursued the Icha Icha novels in his universe. Whereas in my own, I went for children's books. The whole Abukunai Ninja-Mouse series that eventually became animated cartoons, merchandising, the theme park in Snow Country..."
"I had no idea there was so much money in kid's books," said the Jiraiya with the Sekirei.
"I was basically still wanting to put my basic philosophies and dream of a better future out there," admitted camo-Jiraiya. "I figured that kids would be more receptive."
"Whereas I put it all 'in between the lines' in my more adult approach," agreed Jiraiya.
"You wrote smut?" asked other-Naruto.
"You wrote KIDS' books?!" asked Naruto-with-Sekirei.
"Of course you know," said camo-Jiraiya, pulling out a scroll.
"Ah, of course," said the other Jiraiya, likewise pulling out a scroll.
The two handed off the scrolls to their counterpart, and put them carefully away.
"What was that?" asked both Naruto, who then glared at their duplicate.
"Have to use a pseudonym," said Jiraiya.
"Of course," agreed camo-Jiraiya.
"When you return to your own worlds, you're planning on publishing each others' works," said Elminster.
"It's a plan," admitted both Jiraiya.
Read the comments on this episode
(Posted Sat, 20 Apr 2013 15:48)
Questions? Problems? Suggestions?
Send a mail to addventure@bast-enterprises.de
or use the contact form.
らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
All other series and their characters are © by their respective creators or owners. No claims of ownership of these characters are implied by the authors of this Addventure, or should be inferred.
The Anime Addventure is a non-profit site.