“I’m sorry,” I said, trying desperately to brazen it out, “but I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, I rather doubt that,” he said amiably. “It’s possible you don’t know what I mean, but it would mean you in particular were a champion, grade-A imbecile in the line of Harry Sullivan, and I don’t think anyone who hasn’t yet earned his doctorate could be that foolish.
“For example,” he said, pointing to Nagato, “this young lady is almost certainly an organic android of some sort- physically human in appearance, but with a dreadfully flawed behavioral subroutine. I’ve observed Earth humans for hundreds of years, off and on, and you simply don’t act the part.
“And you,” he pointed to Koizumi, “have low-grade psychic abilities of some sort, including a strong resistance to perception filters and other influences. From your conversation thus far I’ll also include empathic abilities at the very least, plus the ability to phase between different overlapping dimensional tangencies.
“And you,” he pointed to me, “you were the first one to see the TARDIS. When I opened the door you were less than a foot away and staring right at me. The perception filter didn’t affect you at all, even though to all appearances you’re as ordinary a human as they come.”
The Doctor paused and looked at us all again before adding, “All of that is mere deduction, so do feel free to correct me if I got something wrong.”
And what was I supposed to say? Yes, you got every last detail absolutely correct, but we still deny it? No, it’s all lies, but there’s no way we can dispute the evidence? I could feel Nagato and Koizumi waiting on me to speak, but they would have a long wait indeed. Under the circumstances I could think of no better response than to kill the Doctor’s words with silence.
“But more to the point,” the Doctor pressed on, “I am a Time Lord, of the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasteroborous. I have stared into the Vortex and I have seen the Void between Time and Space and all dimensions. And I can see that all three of you are out of phase with the rest of your planet. Temporally speaking, of course.” He counted on his fingers for a moment, shook his head when he didn’t like the result, and counted again. “About five and a half centuries, is my guess,” he continued. He pointed to me and said, “Slightly more in your case- at least three years more.”
I felt Yuki’s hand clasp my own lightly. I couldn’t tell if she was looking for support or getting ready to fight to the death to protect me. My eyes remained on the Doctor, regardless. Five and a half centuries was fairly close to the 14,500-odd time loops we’d experienced during the endless summer. And the extra three years lined up with my trip back in time to meet the middle-schooler Suzumiya.
“And finally,” the Doctor said, “there’s the matter of some readings I took from the TARDIS. The charged vacuum corridor that brought Sarah Jane and myself to your version of Earth has sealed itself shut. However, the TARDIS dectected two dimensional overlap zones in the last eighteen hours- one fairly close to here, the other more towards the main shopping district. More to the point,” he said, his eyes twinkling, “it shows a permanent dimensional distortion on the grounds of a certain high school on top of a nearby hill. The same hill where your classmates are all heading,” he said, pointing up the road that climbed the hill near the sidewalk.
“So I’m asking you: what do you know?” The Doctor focused his eyes at me. I was expecting a glare, or some sort of sly look. What I got was something that looked ancient and worried. I had seen something similar in my grandfather’s eyes last summer when my grandmother had vanished for a few days in the aftermath of the cave cricket incident, but this was far deeper. “Anything you can tell me could be vital to my companion and I returning to our home dimension.”
I wished I could take Koizumi and Yuki aside for a conference, to get their opinions on what to do, how much to tell him. Yet I could tell that this situation wouldn’t permit it. I could either lie, say nothing, or say everything, but whatever decision I made now would be the one we were all stuck with.
I looked at Yuki and Koizumi. They were both looking at me, waiting for me to take the lead. Oh, brother. Why was I always the one left to make the decision? Even when Haruhi was nowhere in sight, her influence hovered above the SOS Brigade’s members, inhibiting their own consciences and making them rely on mine instead.
To hell with that. Telling the stranger about the club room and Suzumiya was one thing, but Koizumi’s and Nagato’s secrets weren’t mine to reveal. “Yuki,” I asked, “do you trust this man?”
“I am no longer worried about the second alien,” she said quietly. “Based on my observation of his companion, she is neither hostage nor servant. I do not believe there is any malicious intent at work. But…”
But? What else is there to say?
“But the same deductions and observations made by this person, the first alien will also have made,” she finished at length. Her hand squeezed mine slightly.
“First alien?” the Doctor asked, intrigued, but I ignored him for the moment.
“So,” I said slowly, “apparently your attempt to pass as a normal human weren’t effective?”
“Insufficient data, but such an inference is logical.”
“Then the premise of cutting yourself off from your bosses to avoid detection is already invalid,” I said. “Tell them you need that order rescinded at once.”
“I will try,” Yuki said. “I have already attempted contact twice during this discussion. There is no answer.”
“Keep trying,” I said. I turned to Koizumi. “You probably understand all this better than I do,” I said. “What do you think?”
“I think all he needed was to see Asahina, and he’d have the whole set,” Koizumi said. “He already overheard most of our conversation, so my secret is blown. In any case, I don’t think he could misuse my abilities if he wanted to. The question is, as ever, Suzumiya.”
And?
Koizumi shrugged. “You can’t explain the club room’s alternate space without explaining Suzumiya, and you can’t explain Suzumiya without explaining all of it. If he already knows about the alternate space, we either tell him everything or fight him here and now.”
“Which do you think better?”
“I trust Nagato on this issue,” Koizumi said. “If she is no longer worried about him, that’s enough for me.”
“Right,” I said, turning to face the Doctor. “This will take a while to tell. You’ll have to listen while we’re walking up to the school.”
“Wait a moment!” the Doctor shouted. “I need to get Sarah Jane. I’ve let her sleep in.” He dashed over to the blue box and let himself back in. Over a minute passed before two figures re-emerged: the Doctor, as ever in his jumbled assortment of clothes and that ridiculous scarf, and Sarah Jane Smith in what looked like a blue jump suit suitable for a discotheque.
Oh, brother. You two are going to be as inconspicuous as a Bengal tiger hiding in a snowdrift…
The others let me tell the story as we walked up that damnable hill. The Doctor showed no sign of strain from the steep hill, and neither did Koizumi or Nagato. Only Sarah Jane looked anything like as worn out from the climb as I felt, and she didn’t have the burden of talking the whole way up.
I didn’t go into a blow-by-blow account of all the doings of the SOS Brigade. I simply told about Haruhi Suzumiya, a willful genius without consideration for anyone else, who openly rejected the rules everyone else lived by, and who could- without knowing it- cause cherry trees to bloom in October and invisible lasers to fire from the eyes of innocent beautiful girls.
I told about Nagato and the Data Overmind, alien creatures that transcended time and space. I mentioned the existence of others of her kind, but I didn’t mention the murderous Ryoko Asakura or the enigmatic Eimi Kimidori. The Doctor’s reaction to this was one sentence: “Fascinating- I must introduce you to the TARDIS when we get a chance.”
I told about Mikuru Asahina, the time traveler sent back to observe Suzumiya and to find out why the past could not be accessed more than four years previously. I mentioned how one Asahina or another had taken me on several time jumps in the past, without giving details about the disappearance or the events of Tanabata. This intrigued the Time Lord even more, and he asked a few questions before giving up when he realized I didn’t understand a single word in any of the questions he asked. “Classified information” seemed like a handier phrases than I’d realized before.
Finally I mentioned Koizumi, his Agency of espers dedicated to preserving our world from Suzumiya’s subconscious temper tantrums, and this intrigued the Doctor even more. His questions this time were focused on Suzumiya’s mental state when closed spaces appeared. Did Suzumiya suffer from symptoms of split personality disorder? Did she suffer from doubts? Did she have trouble making decisions quickly? No, no, and no- none of that. In fact, the opposite of all of that. Haruhi with doubts would have made all our lives a lot easier.
But there it was- the main secrets of the SOS Brigade and its members, as insane as those secrets were, given out to two people who by all appearances believed every last word of them. Sarah Jane, the other normal human in our group, seemed just as accepting as the Doctor. “You don’t seem troubled by all of this,” I said to her.
“I’ve seen talking spiders, giant robots, Daleks, Cybermen, robotic mummies, and dinosaurs,” she replied. “Compared to all of that, your club seems so… innocent by comparison.”
And on that word we crested the hill, and there in front of us were the gates to the school. The last crowd of students was just entering; we were on time, but with not a minute to spare.
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(Posted Fri, 10 May 2013 06:19)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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