| **Ramen Eaters*** Level 10 Guild Worgen Lefey, worgen f, Balance Druid, level 28 Ryouga The Explorer, dwarf m, Enhancement Shaman, level 63 Associate Professor Jak, worgen m, Fury Warrior, level 25 Jiraiya the Gallant, human m, Caster Ninja, level 80 Tardra the Zookeeper, night elf f, Beast Master Hunter, level 81 Dekthena Elder, draenei f, Arcane Mage, level 63 Naruto Uzumaki, human m, Ninja, level 8 Thoradora the Explorer, dwarf f, Discipline Priest, level 35 Kierahl, draenei f, Priest, level 6 Selraiha, night elf f, Monk, level 6 Tamer Greylin, dwarf m, Retribution Paladin, level 90 Greyward Elder, worgen m, Frost Death Knight, level 90 Willow the Blue, gnome f, Frost Mage, level 90 Tajra the Disgraced, night elf f, Guardian Druid, level 66 Zeesal the Mercenary, gnome m, Affliction Warlock, level 50 |
Naruto frowned, scratched his head, and considered the scroll. "Let's see, if I do this..."
| **Ramen Eaters*** Worgen Lefey, mining/herbalist = gatherer. Ryouga The Explorer, herbalist/inscription Associate Professor Jak, mining/jewelcrafter Jiraiya the Gallant, herbalist/inscription Tardra the Zookeeper, herbalist/inscription Dekthena Elder, herbalist/alchemy Naruto Uzumaki, none Thoradora the Explorer, mining/engineering Kierahl, herbalist/alchemy Selraiha, none Tamer Greylin, mining/jewelcrafting Greyward Elder, herbalist/alchemy (potion master) Willow the Blue, mining/engineer Tajra the Disgraced, tailor/enchant Zeesal the Mercenary, herbist/skinner |
"Oh, that stinks, we don't have any blacksmiths," noted Selraiha.
"Let's get some quests done before we do that," said Kierahl. "I can make minor healing potions."
"What does any of this actually mean?" asked Naruto.
"We'll go over that later," said Kierahl. "I can do healing, you two are damage specialists, we can group."
"What about..." Selraiha made a gesture towards the bed.
"Oh, we can get to that later," said Kierahl. "Need to get working first."
"Not that," said Selraiha, thinking that a title of 'the Naughty' would suit Kierahl. And herself, for that matter. Might have to research it. "I meant HER."
"Oh," said Kierahl, walking to the bed and sticking her head near the opening underneath it. "What about you, rogue?"
"I'm good," came a muffled voice.
"So, back to missions?" asked Naruto, eager now that the conversation had gone to something he understood. Though a lot of these seemed like D-Rank missions back home.
"Yes! Let's try the area around Goldshire for now," said Kierahl.
"Hey, ya know me, anything for a few silver," said Zeesal. "I dunno about this 'romance' stuff, but coin is always good."
"Zeesal, I sometimes wonder if you're actually a goblin in disguise," said Willow.
There was a momentary pause from Zeesal. "Heh heh. Good one. Yeah. Moving right along. You want me to summon the gal in this picture, using her connection to the kid. As long as there's a strong enough connection - yeah I can do it."
"Excellent," said Willow. "How much are we talking about?"
"Well, now," said Zeesal, rubbing his hands together. "How much you got?"
"Oh, where was that anti-disguise spell I made?" asked Willow.
"Now now, no need to get out something like that," Zeesal said quickly. "Reasonable rates are my specialty. It's not like I'm some goblin. Err, I swear by the power of gear ratios."
"Fargodeep Mine?" asked Naruto. "Who names this stuff?"
"I think it was Joshua Fargo actually," said Kierahl.
"Oh," said Naruto, twitching. "I thought it was something hentai."
"What's 'hentai' anyway?" asked Kierahl.
"About half the things you suggest," mumbled Naruto.
"Eh? I couldn't hear you," said Kierahl. "Draenei hearing isn't as sensitive to low frequencies you know."
"I didn't know that," said Naruto.
"Elf hearing on the other hand," said Selraiha.
"Yeah, with those ears," said Naruto, reaching out and tugging on one.
"Eep!" eeped Selraiha, her skin turning purple.
"Hey, either of you guys want a Kobold Mining Shovel?" asked a paladin, hefting it. "I just got a better weapon."
"I guess," said Naruto, not understanding that sentence at all.
"Zeesal the Weasel."
Zeesal shoved something into a drawer very quickly. "Gee, busy day today. I was just about to close up shop."
"Oh?" asked Dekthena, jingling a little Penny Pouch. "I was hoping we could do business."
"Those things are cheap little things given out at Hallow's End, you can't fit hardly anything in 'em," pointed out Zeesal. "Now if you don't..."
Dekthena pulled something out.
"That's a wizard's hat," noted Zeesal, eyes wide before he could recover and feign disinterest. "Oh, uhm. How nice."
"Picked one up in Dalaran that I had a feeling would look good on you," said Dekthena, toying with the hat and noting how the gnome's eyes tracked it. "And I've heard you've wanted a proper wizarding hat."
"Rrrrrrr." Zeesal actually growled. "What do you want for it?"
"Simple enough," said Dekthena. "You know what a sucker I am for romantic stories."
"You ain't my type," quickly put in Zeesal.
"Good joke," said Dekthena without missing a beat. "No. I'm wanting to help out Naruto Uzumaki."
Zeesal stopped. "That kid? I mean, yeah, I know who you're talking about."
Dekthena flicked a hand up, holding a piece of paper. "Can you track his true love through a love letter and bring her here?"
"I might be able to arrange something," admitted Zeesal.
"You no take candle!"
Naruto kicked the kobold in the face. "Why would I freakin' WANT your smelly damn candle?!"
"Get him! He diss candle!" yelled another kobold.
"Oh shazbot," said Selraiha as kobolds started pouring out of their warrens.
"Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!" called out Naruto as the swarm of kobolds leapt and managed a fairly good imitation of a cresting wave.
Naruto brandished his Shovel with the Fiery Weapon enchant.
"Zeesall, I - What is that stench?!"
Zeesall frowned and finished tying the napkin into place. "Lunch!"
"You're actually eating..." asked Le Fay, looking a little green despite her fur.
"It's just Winter Squid, grilled over an open fire," noted Zeesall, preparing to eat.
"'Winter Squid'? It's the Midsummer Festival," said Le Fay, staring at the plate.
"Yup," said Zeesall. "Found it in the back of a backpack I'd thrown in the bank months ago. So what did you want if it wasn't lunch?"
"Oh, right," said Le Fay. "That kid -"
"Naruto Uzumaki?" asked Zeesall.
"Well, yes," said Worgen Le Fay. "Anyway I have-"
"Is it a photo or a letter?" asked Zeesall, sipping at a glass of red wine.
"A memento," said Le Fay.
"Fine. I'll get to it after lunch. Just leave everything on the table there," said Zeesall.
"Aaaaaughibbrgubugbugrguburgle!"
"Not AGAIN!"
"And I thought kobolds were dumb and annoying."
"I'm really beginning to hate those things."
"How far away do we have to be for them not to get pulled?"
Blue Recluse, Stormwind:
Zeesall plopped down onto one of the cushions and sighed.
"Rough day, Zeesall?"
"Baby, you have no idea," said Zeesall. "Every five minutes someone from my guild or one of two others would come by. Kid's popular and everyone wants to see him get together with his little friend. Never met the kid but I gotta say I'm curious now."
"Lotsa closet-romantic types eh?" asked Lisan Pierce.
"Like you or your two friends there aren't?" asked Zeesall. "Honestly, I've heard speculation about you three being a bit more than friends."
"Idle gossip," dismissed Lisan, nodding to her two friends who had seated at one of the tables.
"Which is what you're trying to get from me," said Zeesall. "I been drinking, but I ain't been drinking THAT much."
"So you're going to do it?" asked Lisan.
"I been paid, ain't I?" asked Zeesall. "Still, no guarantee of success. But I been paid up front, so of course I'm gonna try. Gotta think of my rep too you know."
"Most warlocks are a bit nasty, but you always know where you stand with Zeesall," admitted Lisan. "You should have been born a goblin."
"Hey, I resemble that remark," said Zeesall. "I gotta good rep with Steamwheedle after all."
Lisan reached into her purse and pulled out a couple of coins. "Joachim, one on me of whatever he's having. Me and my friends will have some Dalaran Noir."
The bartender nodded.
"Just bring me a bottle and five glasses," said Zeesall as he got up. Well, slid off the barstool as he was shorter than his seat. "We're gonna do this right and we'll need the fortification."
"Zuggity zug zug v'krall!"
"Huh?" asked Naruto. "What he say?"
"Side-effect of these that allow translation of basic language and speech," said Selraiha, producing her book and tapping a design on the back cover. "If they're of a neutral faction or a faction that you're with - even if the mouth parts wouldn't let them speak your language - you can usually understand them. If they're of the opposite faction - like the Horde, you can't. It all comes out scrambled."
"Oh, so that's why the kobolds and murlocs keep talking and you only make out half of what they're saying?" asked Naruto.
"Yeah, more or less," admitted Selraiha.
"Zuggit co'krow nahakk?" asked the orc.
"So why's our guards letting him approach?" asked Naruto.
"One orc, about our level, and using a white flag to approach in plain sight," pointed out Selraiha. "Won't keep some of the guards or locals from killing him, but they'll just watch him to see what he does otherwise."
"Zuggit, nok nok whuzzere?" asked the orc.
"A warlock from what I'm getting, and he keeps gesturing at you and your belly," observed Kierahl.
"What's a warlock again?" asked Naruto, getting a sinking feeling he knew what this was about.
"Warlocks are those who started off with arcane or nature magic studies and went off in pursuit of a different power entirely," said Kierahl. "They're mostly concerned with demons, summoning and controlling them."
"I see," said Naruto. "Can they sense demons?"
"Uhm, yeah, I'm pretty sure they can." Kierahl nodded.
The orc rolled his eyes, then brought one thick hand to slap himself in the temple before squatting down in front of them and scribbling things out in a patch of dirt.
"Ah, those are arcane equations," said Kierahl after the orc had written a few things out. "I think the stick figure with the swirl and arrow pointing at his stomach is supposed to be you, Lord Naruto."
"Uh huh," said Naruto.
Zogarim wasn't bad as far as Warlocks went. In fact, he was a bit of a nerd by orc standards.
He'd overheard a few of the higher-ups talking about a powerful demon actually sealed inside someone, and that had intrigued him.
So he'd snuck over here into Alliance Territory, having a friend who had maps and schedules of the patrols, and tried to ask the individual in question about it.
Per his previous experience with the Alliance, they didn't go out of their way to hunt down a single orc. Most were preoccupied with their current duties or quests or whatever. A few even waved and smiled at him as he snuck in.
Naturally, he waved and smiled back. Not all humans were resource-stealing racially-blinded orc-slayers who sought another kill in their tally. Just like not all orcs were ready to crush any human who wandered too close to a border.
He supposed most of those waving at him mistook him for a scout, a smuggler, or a prankster.
Well, there were those on both sides too. He remembered with great fondness when he and those friends of his had gotten three buckets of yellow paint, some rope, and a patrol schedule. Ah, good times that.
Unfortunately, the language barrier thing was hitting full force. He couldn't study the magical prison holding the beast within the youth's overdimension patterns with the boy's shirt on. Even then, Zogarim was thinking the complexity would be way beyond his ability to duplicate - but man would it make for some fascinating study! Might even be able to impress his old instructor.
Nah, nothing would impress old sourpuss Makrawl The Many-Scarred. Probably show up at his own funeral and work up a scathing criticism of the whole thing that'd have the chanters break down crying.
"Twelve point summoning array?"
"Checked!"
"Y'ssarian control pattern?"
"Checked it TWICE."
"Check it once more, just in case. Anchor thread?"
"In place and grounded. How much are we getting for this?"
"Enough for three cases of that dwarf ale you like."
"Check THAT!"
"Thought you'd like that," said Zeesall. "Nembis Filter?"
"You sure all this'll be necessary? We're just doing a summoning, y'know."
"Transdimensional and not from the Local Group," noted Zeesall. "Not even the same branching of universes. We got enough stuff for probable lock-on, but I wanna cut down on some of the bad stuff that can happen in this situation."
"We're all pretty experienced at this crap, y'know."
"I know," agreed Zeesall. "Besides, I gotta feelin'."
"Oh," said Yngvi. "Not like the time I got turned into a louse, is it?"
"Nah, not that, besides we gots a spell anchor. Come to think of it though - double check the grounding."
"Double check, aye!"
"Door locked?" asked Yngvi. "Don't need no door-to-door marketers busting in like that one time."
"Door lock check, aye!" said Slythur, grinning in a way that she thought was cute but as she was a goblin didn't quite make that category.
"Sure we can do it with just six of us?"
"If you wake up the other three, yeah," said Zeesall.
"Chevron one, locked."
"Well, wake 'em up and let's get going," said Zeesall.
"All of this for the same person?" asked Slythur, poking the box of stuff. "Some of it looks funky."
"Specified one individual in the script," said Zeesall. "That should fix it if there's more than one. It'll just draw the one with the strongest connection to the kid. Who I gotta meet after all this to see what the fuss is over."
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(Posted Sat, 13 Jul 2013 17:24)
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