They were also naked, vaguely resembled a cross between Naruto and Sakura in features, and colored a bit odd.
One smiled, buffed an apple on her breasts, then offered him the apple.
Hiruzen Sarutobi stifled a nosebleed that would have rocketed him completely out of the training ground. Then he merely accepted the gift, made eye contact and took a big bite.
Kakashi made a strangled noise that indicated he was suppressing some likewise understandable reaction. Or asking for an apple himself.
"-and so I discovered that the main reason that I can't dispel them is they WANT to stay here," continued Naruto. "I don't know why. They're nature spirits and they just LOOK mostly human."
"Uhm, are they fertility spirits by any chance?" asked Hiruzen Sarutobi, who'd never run across something like this but HAD some idea about the whole thing.
Two of them clapped hands and jumped up and down in a way that was VERY distracting. Two others nodded. One flashed him a thumb's up. The last... ah. No, he wasn't going to look at that one and he was going to invoke the Cold Shower No Jutsu soon.
"I think that's a yes," said Kakashi.
"They aren't human, but they're able to learn and eventually develop something vaguely sort of like an understanding of human behavior," said Naruto. "So. Uhm. What do you want done here?"
"They inhabit trees?" asked the Hokage. "They have a slow form of Mokuton where they heal trees, cause them to grow anew? They will eventually be able to speak and interact with humans?"
"Yes to all of them, I think," said Naruto.
"They're fine then," said the Hokage. "When they learn to speak, I'll see if we can use them as sentries in the woods surrounding Konoha."
Two of them very nearly hugged him, only being discouraged by ANBU placing themselves in the way.
As that was denied, apparently four of them decided to hug Team 7's kunoichi - their breasts nearly suffocating the poor girl before they released her.
Jiraiya wandered away from the hot springs fence. Somehow he knew that he was missing out on something groundbreaking.
Something that would inspire him beyond a mere hot springs resort near the Cloud border.
What could it be?
"So, you acted like an idiot for years?" asked Shikamaru, moving a go piece. "Why?"
"Because of S-Class Secrets and S-Class Criminals and the staffing problems caused by the Kyubi attack," said Naruto, studying the board. "Apparently the jonin levels took the brunt of it, followed by chunin. Still recovering but better than they were right after."
"Sounds troublesome," admitted Shikamaru.
"Very," said Naruto as he moved a piece.
"Not a very good shogi player, but you did say it was your first time," noted Shikamaru.
"WHY ARE YOU TWO PLAYING SHOGI?!" demanded Ino as she stomped up. As much as a thin pre-teen girl could stomp, but she mostly made up for a lack of weight with attitude.
"Silence," said Naruto, making an off-hand gesture. "Hmmm. Should I move this one? No, you'd counter that."
Shikamaru stared at the wildly gesticulating and shouting Ino, who was apparently unaware that nobody could hear a single word she was saying. His eyes flicked to Naruto, then back to Ino, then back to Naruto. "How much?"
"Eh?" asked Naruto, glancing up.
"How much to teach me that jutsu?" asked Shikamaru.
Ino came stomping up, still completely silent and began yelling directly at Shikamaru.
"Try this," said Naruto, showing a set of hand-signs and then pointing at Ino.
"-AND I'VE NEVER BEEN IGNORED BY YOU AND I DON'T INTEND FOR YOU TO START NOW!"
"Silence," said Shikamaru, trying it out.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN -" squeaked Ino before she stopped. "Wait. Was that my voice?! My voice?! What did you do to my voice?! I sound like a freaking mouse!"
"Let me try again. Silence," tried Shikamaru.
Ino blinked, feeling her throat. Swallowing nervously and licking her lips before she spoke. "Testing.Testing. Okay. Back to normal. Good."
"To answer your question," said Naruto. "Kakashi-sensei wanted me to learn shogi. Apparently this teaches strategy. The reason that Shikamaru isn't pulling weeds is that someone has to teach me the game."
"Yeah, right," said Ino. "Why would a loser like you need to learn strategy?"
"So this is where you are," said Sasuke, walking up the path.
"SASUKE-KUN! IT'S BEEN SO LONG!"
Sasuke got a look of horror as Ino declared all this in mid-leap.
"Grasp Of Earth!"
A hand formed out of rock and dirt grabbed Ino on her downward arc, then sucked her into the ground to the point where her head and neck were the only parts showing.
Sasuke looked at Ino, then gave a long walk around her.
"WHAT THE HELL?!" asked Ino.
"Silence," recast Naruto.
"You can cast a spell which immobilizes an opponent and then keeps them quiet?" asked Sasuke, seeing many many uses for such a thing.
"Well, it's two spells, but yeah," said Naruto.
Sasuke considered the possibility of offering his team-mate a fee every time he did that to annoying fangirls. Really, it did have a staggering amount of appeal at the moment.
Kakashi blurred into place and quickly took stock of the situation. "Naruto. Let Ino up."
"Ino? What't that pig..." Sakura came up the same trail that Sasuke had used and noticed how Ino's head was sticking up out of the ground and had turned just enough to glare at her. "Anyone got a camera? Anyone?"
"Why, Kakashi-sensei?" asked Naruto.
"Because it's not fair to Choji to be the only one picking weeds," said Kakashi.
"Thank you!" called out Choji.
"Release," said Naruto, snapping his fingers in Ino's direction. She popped out of the ground and grumbled in their general direction before going back to the field.
"I don't think she wanted to chance whatever you were going to do next," said Kakashi.
"There's a spell I know that would put her instantly to sleep," said Naruto. "Problem is - it's another one I haven't practiced any."
"So you could end up just blowing her up instead," guessed Kakashi. "Okay, we're getting some practice time set aside for you."
"Thank you, Kakashi-sensei."
"In the meantime, I've also got some good news," said Kakashi. "Most teams have to do 25 D-Rank missions before they get a C-Rank mission. Team 7 will meet at 0900 tomorrow at the Hokage's office for a C-Rank mission."
Sakura was the first to speak. "Aren't C-Rank missions the ones where we go outside the village?"
"Yes," said Kakashi, peering over Naruto's shoulder at the shogi board.
"So, due to Naruto's ability to destroy entire training grounds and innocent mountains, we're going outside the village to avoid massive property damage?" asked Sakura.
Kakashi turned to regard her. "You managed to find the underneath on that pretty quickly."
"Any idea what it is?" asked Sasuke.
"Haven't gotten the mission scroll yet," said Kakashi, not mentioning that he already knew it was:
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(Posted Fri, 31 Oct 2014 07:56)
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