The sound echoed across the moon.
The Being with all the eyes sighed. "You know that you didn't define who the 'you' is in that wish? Did you mean Sasuke, Sakura, both of them, the Kyubi, the universe in general? No. It doesn't matter. Here goes."
Poof! went Sasuke, suddenly not there.
"What?" asked Naruto.
"Retroactive. Your past is changing and most likely you won't be a part of Team 7."
"What? Wait-" began Sakura before she poofed away as well.
"Hmmm. Looks like the pivot point the program chose to shift things shifted a lot of things. Interesting."
"What?" repeated Naruto before he vanished as well.
Naruto, age one:
"WHO DARES TO DISTURB THE KYUBI?!"
"Babaa wha?"
The great fox looked out through the bars of its cage and focussed on the child mostly submerged in the water. "What in the Uchiha?! A baby? How can a... damn. Go away kid."
"Ba-baaa!"
"Bye-bye? Did that pale monkey-spawn just wave and say 'bye-bye' to ME?! The most fearsome of the tailed beasts?" The Kyubi settled down to nap again. "Well. At least he's a polite little monkey-stain."
Naruto, age three:
"Whoa. BIG!"
"Well, at least you're a bit more articulate this time," grumbled the Kyubi. "Now go away and leave me alone."
"Are you my Daddy?"
Long ears flicked back and teeth showed. "No."
"Are you my Mama?"
More teeth showed and the Kyubi GLARED at the little boy. "NO."
"Not the mama?" asked a depressed-sounding Naruto.
"Definitely not the mama. Go away."
"Want a candy? It's good!" said the child, holding a lollipop out.
"You've already been licking it."
"Oh," said Naruto. "Jiji gave me. But only one."
"You would share candy with me, even if you have only the one?" The Kyubi stuck his head back up and looked at the child. "I hate you with a hate hotter than the fires of the sun itself. I hate you with a hate deeper than the gulf between the stars."
"Tha' okay," said Naruto. "Everyone else too. 'Cept Jiji. Bye. Going sleep now."
The Kyubi settled back into a sleeping position. "Chatterbox."
Naruto, age six:
"Was it a shunshin?" asked the Hokage, curious.
"No sir, examination indicates a new bloodline ability. He forms an isolated pocket of space/time around himself and then moves that pocket to another area," said the researcher-nin. "That's what forms the blue box."
"Why does it make a wheezing noise then?" asked the Hokage.
"Not sure, probably involves the layering effect," said the researcher.
The Hokage nodded. "Any idea of where he went?"
"Interviews with the three of them indicated that Naruto was startled when confronted after an attempt to get attention, and they reappeared on a barren world with a completely different sky than we are used to seeing," said the researcher.
"Another world?" asked the Hokage, thinking it was fairly impressive range to be able to appear on one of the other planets in their solar system. Of course, there HAD been indications in the past that chakra manipulation over the course of a lifetime had some effects that could be passed on to offspring. With Kushina carrying the Kyubi and Minato's jutsu - he could see how something like this was possible.
"Yes, sir, outside our galaxy in fact, so we're talking about a range of about one hundred and twenty thousand light years," said the researcher, twitching slightly as he tried to work his own mind around that sort of distance.
The Hokage was silent for a moment as he faced the same problem. "You're sure of that?"
"Wouldn't report it if I wasn't, sir," said the researcher. "Shikamaru Nara was quite clear in his observations. There was a galaxy fully visible and dominating the night sky. From the angle and old records we worked out what sort of distance that would require."
"In a way, this is as disturbing as when he was three and told me about a 'grumpy fox' that was telling him to 'eat his vegetables' and such," said the Hokage. "Very well. Keep me informed as to your progress."
Naruto, age nine:
He'd known something was up. He just got a feeling like that every so often and then he'd use his Time And Relative Dimensions In Space No Jutsu to get there and take a look.
In this case, he'd ended up in the same village.
In this case, he came wandering into a slaughter.
"AAAAA!" screamed a bunch of kids running into a room away from the scary scary man.
"Come out, come out, wherever you are," called the orange-masked figure, knowing the kids were now cornered and unable to get away. "That was foolish of... you?"
That had come out as a question because there was now a blue box, looking rather like a standalone closet or something, sitting in the room.
A quick look around revealed no other hiding places, so he soon stood in front of the box and pondered its presence. "Come out now, time for you naughty children to take a long nap."
"Not tired!" came a little girl's voice from within the box, followed immediately by many shooshing noises.
A little surprised that all those kids could fit, the one called Madara among other things activated his jutsu and stepped through the wall.
WHAM!
-or, rather, tried to step through the wall.
Whatever the box was made of, it didn't act like normal matter and allow him to phase through it.
"Open up, little kiddies, and let me in," tried the masked assassin.
"Not by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin," responded a little boy's voice. Followed by many shooshings as the other comment had been.
Grind-thump, grind-thump, grind-thump, grind... thunk!
The masked figure tried to grab ahold of the thing so it would stop fading away.
It took him a few seconds to realize that this was a thoroughly BAD idea as it felt like he was pulled in directions that didn't actually exist. And then he was sinking into a snowbank somewhere in the Land of Unending Ice.
Didn't mean he couldn't get back. It was just that he was then soaked in ice water thereafter. And still throwing up and pooping blood and bruised from whatever had happened when the box had moved with him holding on.
Catching a cold right afterwards had just been icing on that particular cake.
"So the Uchiha Clan is down to Sasuke Uchiha, and twelve children of under six years of age?"
"Yes, Hokage-sama. That Boy used his TARDIS-jutsu to arrive during the slaughter and whisk them to safety."
"Where are they now?" asked the Hokage.
"That Boy took Iruka Umino and Shikamaru Nara to the current location, we have determined that it is a large island somewhere in the Sea Of Green - a tropical island."
"Ah. Warm beaches, crystalline lakes, deep forests, ocean breezes, that sort of thing?" asked the Hokage.
"Exactly, sir. Sir?"
"I think I should investigate this place myself. Take a good look around in case there's anything dangerous."
"Is that a graphite fishing rod and reel?"
"Why, yes, I do believe it is," said the Hokage in a tone that indicated he was wondering how that got there.
"..."
"Boar? His jutsu allows him to travel in time and space, with a few caveats like not being able to cross his own timestream. So I could, purely theoretically, pop out for a few weeks on a tropical island and reappear five or so minutes after I left."
"Actually, sir, I was wondering if I could borrow that after you're done."
"I HATE YOU! I HATE HUMANS! AND I HATE PINEAPPLE!"
Little Naruto cocked his head and stared into the prison. "Would you like a banana then?"
"NO!"
"Man, you're really hard to please. Too bad there's no way to let you out. I think you could use a vacation. Iruka-sensei sure seems less grumpy after the fish fry."
"You could tear off this seal and let me out."
"Doesn't that kill me and turn you loose to rampage and that kinda thing? Oh. There's some wild pigs on this island. Maybe I can bring you some roast pork!"
" Roast... pork? That sounds - NO! I WILL KILL ALL OF YOU! YOU SHALL DIE HORRIBLY!"
"Well, okay, if you don't want any."
The great beast closed his eyes and turned away from the little boy. "Go away."
Shikamaru Nara had found where one of the ANBU, in the process of setting things up here, had put a long sheet between two of the local odd trees. It was apparently called a "hammock" and it was a near-perfect way to cloud-watch.
He'd been present in class when there had been an odd noise, and something had faded into existence nearby. Naruto had come out, told the teacher that he needed help and there were injuries.
Shikamaru's family took care of a large deer herd. He had some basic experience with first aid as a result. He'd thought it all very troublesome at the time but perhaps less boring than sitting there in class.
He still wasn't sure what had happened to the kids, the injuries were similar to being too close to an explosive tag. One of the kids had taken a kunai to the knee - which was the sort of injury one inflicted on a target to restrict mobility.
Naruto's blue box jutsu forms a 'box' roughly the size of a closet on the outside. Inside it is a much larger room. Fuuinjutsu of some kind? In any case, he can move very long distances in hardly any time at all. Bending space/time was the basis of sealing techniques after all.
So twelve kids younger than myself. All of whom apparently owe their lives to Naruto and this 'Time and Relative something or other to do with space' jutsu.
Shikamaru sighed from his position on the hammock. He really needs a way of shortening that name.
"It's because I can always tell where I am," said Naruto. "I just KNOW. So when I was looking in this book, it kinda clicked together and so I started looking for scrolls and it all just sorta came together."
"It just came together," said the very very scary man. Who was actually making an effort to be less scary because if you scared children TOO much - the answers you got from them became less understandable and they'd answer anything just keep the scary man away.
Naruto nodded happily. This was great. He'd managed to get away from Evil Mask Guy even if the mask HAD been orange and therefore awesome. He'd have to get an orange not-scary mask and then they could be Evil Mask Guy and Good Mask Guy. Except when he'd brought up this idea Iruka-sensei and Scarred Scary Guy had both winced and Iruka-sensei had did that bit where he used one hand to cover most of his face.
Naruto knew that meant something wasn't going right. Either that or Iruka-sensei was getting a headache. Naruto decided to put that idea on hold, he'd just settle for everyone recognizing how thoroughly awesome his Time And Relative Dimensions In Space No Jutsu was!
"How could you just throw together a fuuinjutsu this complicated?" asked Scarred Scary Man. "Do you have any idea how many laws of physics this violates?"
"Uhm, no," said Naruto, momentarily shaken from his proud moment at that question. "Am I in trouble then?"
"No," said Scarred Scary Man. "We're ninja. Breaking or abusing the laws of physics is something we put on our resumes."
At Naruto's puzzled look, Iruka further explained. "It means you're not in trouble, you're actually doing things right."
"Oh good!" exclaimed Naruto, nodding. He was happy to get back to being proud of his accomplishments after all.
It took five days for Sasuke Uchiha to recover from the genjutsu that he'd been thrown into.
At which point he'd found himself dealing with something else to shake his world.
"What do you mean 'some of my clan' survived?" asked Sasuke.
"A group of children were rescued by some classified jutsu used by Uzumaki Naruto," said the doctor, filling out forms on a table nearby. "My understanding is that there are twelve of them, currently held in a secure location. Other than that, all I have are rumors. Take anything else you hear with a healthy degree of skepticism."
"I find it hard to believe that the class clown could do anything right in the first place," said Sasuke.
"He's a real Uzumaki apparently, they'll surprise you like that," said the doctor.
"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Sasuke, scowling. Still, the idea that SOMEONE survived was a bright spot of hope to pierce the darkness he felt in his heart. He didn't want to believe this only to be disappointed later, but on the other hand some indication that That Man hadn't been completely successful was something he wanted to believe.
The doctor glanced at him before turning back to her paperwork. "I knew an Uzumaki once. The 'Red Hot Habanero' of Konoha. It was easy to dismiss her if you'd looked at her scores back at the Academy. Nasty temper, good taijutsu skills, not all that bright either. Then you find out she's a genius at fuuinjutsu, and if there was an enemy and she brought out her chains? Formidable. Saw her in the chunin exams after I'd dropped out of the ninja program and specialized in medicine. Some people are like that, I suppose. They don't do well until they get to the right environment and then they really shine."
"You were a ninja?" asked Sasuke.
"My case as well, I suppose," said the doctor. "I just wasn't cut out for the ninja lifestyle. Did a lot better when I'd dropped out of the program and apprenticed here at the hospital."
Sasuke shook his head. He knew there were others who were not ninja but all he really knew was the ninja lifestyle. Even his Aunt and Uncle that had owned the senbei shop were technically ninja. Though hadn't they retired from that themselves?
"Okay, Naruto. Use your jutsu," said the ANBU commander with the dog-mask.
"Right," said Naruto, sounding chipper.
Sasuke watched carefully. Naruto concentrated, made a motion like he was writing something in midair, then snapped his fingers.
Grind-thump, grind-thump, grind-thump.
Blue walls appeared around him, Naruto, and the two ANBU who'd been present.
Sasuke walked over to one, tapped a wall to confirm it was solid, and was momentarily thoughtful. He glanced to where Naruto was now sitting in the middle of the room, considering the class clown and this odd jutsu.
There was a moment where there was an odd sensation of movement, but that passed quickly.
"We're here," said Naruto.
"Fine," said the Dog ANBU. "Don't dismiss your construct unless you start feeling tired, we'll be back shortly."
They left Naruto there, going towards a door and then through.
Sasuke blinked as he left the "construct" and stepped out into a different environment. When the blue walls had appeared, it had been early morning and somewhat chilly. When he'd stepped out it was darker. Either earlier in the morning or late in the evening. It wasn't chilly though, feeling warmer and more humid. Smells he couldn't readily identify, and an overall different feel to the air.
"Swallow," advised Dog. "Air pressure's different."
Sasuke swallowed and the odd feeling in his ears abated.
One of the ANBU who apparently had been present in a knot of similarly clad individuals made a gesture and the two ANBU who'd come with Sasuke went off to confer.
Another ANBU, this one with a mask decorated by painting the upper quarter green, came from that group. "Uchiha Sasuke. This way."
Sasuke Uchiha would have faced the complete destruction of his clan. Sasuke Uchiha would have become a brooding loner who distrusted everyone, since everyone could either be taken from you or would betray you overnight.
Things were different. He was not alone.
He understood the reasoning for the twelve Uchiha to be kept on that island. Apparently the island could be reached without Naruto, but it would take months for ninja to reach it through normal means. Naruto could reach it nearly instantly but his jutsu was apparently unique, classified as a secret clan technique. As the exact location was apparently only known to Naruto, the Hokage, and two others - Itachi would not be able to hunt them down and kill them. Not easily at least.
And if the only way to quickly find and get to the last remaining remnants of the Uchiha clan was through the class clown?
Sasuke trained, but he had to learn more about and keep an eye on the class clown that he had dismissed as inconsequential prior to recent events. Itachi would eventually want to deal with those children, and so he would come for Naruto.
And Sasuke wanted to be stronger and there for it when Itachi came.
"Did you hear?" asked Ino, settling into place at the outdoors table at the Academy.
"Hear what?" asked Sakura.
Ino began counting things off. "Why Sasuke has been missing classes. Why Naruto keeps getting called out of class. Why people who used to tell us to stay away from Naruto are now saying he might not be so bad after all. Why Iruka-sensei didn't wake Naruto up when he fell asleep in class."
"Troublesome," muttered Shikamaru from nearby.
"Oh, well, YOU are troublesome," responded Ino.
"You realize most of the details are classified as secrets, right?" asked Shikamaru, not moving from where he was lying along a tree branch.
"I'm not going into details!" protested Ino.
Shikamaru settled a bit further onto his perch and sighed.
"Besides," added Ino, "it's not like we're the only ones who notice something's going on. I overheard Takahara-sensei talking to Mizuki-sensei about it."
"Oh?" asked Sakura. "So what about Sasuke-kun?"
"Most of his clan was killed by a missing-nin with a grudge," said Ino. "That's why the Konoha Military Police is all scrambling to cover things and has those recruitment posters up. Most of the MPs were Uchiha Clan. Naruto somehow got involved and had to be rescued and is now-"
"Obviously," said an Iruka Umino who had abruptly appeared behind Ino. "We need to work on your understanding of the term 'secret' and on why ninja shouldn't gossip. Ino - I want a five page essay on my desk by the end of the week."
"THAT'S NOT FAIR!" declared Ino. "Anyone would be curious about all this going on!"
"Maybe I should ask your father directly about this," mused Iruka.
"Yeah, right, Iruka-sensei," said Ino. "He'll understand!"
"Whoa," said Sakura the next morning. "Did you get any sleep?"
Ino stumbled to her desk, sat down, and her face impacted the desktop a moment later.
"Even her hair looks limp," said Choji. "What happened yesterday?"
"Ino was telling me how Sasuke's clan was killed off by something Naruto did," said Sakura. "Well, I guess that just proves who is going to be around to help Sasuke in his hour of need!"
"Uhm, that's not what happened," said Naruto, who was present in class and actually awake. "I'm just told I can't talk about it. Secrets ya know."
"Admit it, Naruto!" declared Sakura, pointing at him. "You screwed something up didn't you?! Sasuke is missing from class because of you!"
"Sakura. Seven page essay on the nature of secrets and why silence is a virtue of the ninja world on my desk by the end of the week," said Iruka as he walked in.
"WHAT?!" screeched Sakura.
"I can't believe Daddy said those things to me," grumbled Ino.
"Quiet, Ino-pig. I've still got four pages to go," said Sakura, trying to think of something to add.
"Don't get mad at me. It's your own fault," said Ino.
"No, it's Naruto's fault!" agreed Sakura.
"How is it Naruto's fault?" asked Ino.
"He's a boy," said Sakura.
Ino nodded. Yeah, that did kind of slant things towards the guilty end of things.
"There he goes, sneaking off without a care in the world," grumbled Sakura. "I'd like to see HIM try to write a seven page essay."
"Hmmmm," hmmmed Ino. "One of the things Daddy said. Finding out secrets and keeping secrets are equally important. We're supposed to find out hidden truths and meanings but not actually go talking about them."
"Yeah, that sounds kind of ninja-ey," said Sakura.
"Is 'ninja-ey' a real word?" asked Ino.
"Shut up, Ino-pig," growled Sakura, stowing her books and leaving the table. "I got things to do!"
"So do I!" declared Ino, likewise sweeping her books into a pack and striding off.
Chupacabra made a disgusted noise behind his ANBU mask. "They're stalking Naruto?"
"Yup." Dog shook his head.
"So they're darting from behind one object to another, trying to hide and keep Uzumaki from spotting them," said Chupacabra.
"Yup," repeated Dog.
"They should take a lesson or two from that Hyuga girl, she's at least a little less obvious," said Chupacabra.
"For certain values of 'less obvious' - yeah," said Dog.
"Just a second," said Chupacabra. "Oh she's going to go along that fence near the river. Hang on."
Dog watched as his subordinate got ahead of Ino, produced a set of cleaning supplies out of a sealing scroll, and carefully arranged things.
Chupacabra used a shunshin to return to their vantage point. "Got a camera?"
Ino screamed briefly as she stepped on a wet bar of soap after the bucket covered her head, which was cut off when she splashed into the river.
"Too simple," commented Dog as he lowered the camera.
"Hey, it was a classic," said Chupacabra. "Have to get a copy to Inoichi. We're just proving he needs to work with her evasion and trap detection skills."
"Hmmm," said Dog, taking another picture of the girl as she climbed back up out of the water.
"Her rival just stopped to laugh at her. She's standing on a fence." Chupacabra regarded his superior.
"Can you do better than a bar of soap?" asked Dog.
A stone whipped out and hit a piece of fence, which sagged just an inch or two. A girl yelped as she fell, landing head-first in a garbage can which fell over and rolled downhill into the river.
"That garbage can wasn't there a minute ago, they might notice," said Dog when Chupacabra returned.
"From the sound of it, they aren't noticing little details like that," said Chupacabra. "Better?"
"Too contrived," said Dog.
"But it might lead to them learning to pay attention to their environment," protested Chupacabra. "I'm doing it for their sakes."
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