Missing Persons: Ranma's brain hurts... We must operate ! [Episode 38372]

by Jamil Nate

Ranma stumbled a little after Akane's mallet strike, trying to regain his bearings. The shock of having been attacked by his fiancee with the intent to REALLY hurt him was also playing havoc with his morale.

He hadn't seen the open and empty programming pod behind him and fell inside. The pod activated and sedated him immediately. One of Ataru's girls walked to the control board and launched the reprogramming sequence. But before she could turn Ranma into his cursed form and confirm the procedure, all hell broke loose for Ataru's forces.

Ranma's fall combined with the desperate situation the good guys were in pushed Steel Angel Kurumi to slip into 'demon mode'. Her eyes glazed over and black feathered wings flashed on her back. A second later, she was hurling red energy blasts left and right. Walls were destroyed, machinery exploded and enemies were scattered like dead leaves in the wind.

Ifurita, having finally duplicated the starfleet phaser's beam, began to efficiently neutralize the opposition. Those who were tough enough to resist the stunning effect were left sufficiently shaken for Nuku Nuku, Alita and Fighter Honey to knock them out.

Seeing that the tide of the battle was turning against them, Ataru's slaves retreated. They would wait for the Master to regain consciousness. He will know what to do.

Alita had grabbed Kurumi who seemed ready to pursue and was shaking her "Kurumi ! KURUMI !!! Snap out of it, Kurumi ! They're gone !"

"Uh ? Eh ?" The pink-haired steel angel blinked as she came back to normal. Worry replaced the vacuous expression she was wearing earlier "Aaaah ! Is Goshujin-sama okay, desu ?"

"Honey... FLASH !" Honey transformed into doctor Honey and went to the pod where Ranma was sleeping "Thank God, the programming hasn't started" Her expression became thoughtful as she looked at the information displayed on the screen "Hey ! These pods can double as healing tanks !"

Ifurita analysed the situation and spoke "Ranma needs medical attention. He took a severe hit on the head. We should take advantage of this feature, we will need his help when Ataru and his forces mount a counterattack"

"You're right, Ifurita..." Honey turned to face Tom "Lt. Paris, could you go back to the main computer and see what you can do ? We need every advantage we can get"

The starfleet officer nodded "I'm on it"

"Xander, Clark, gather the wounded and unconscious slaves. We'll put them in these pods there. We can heal them and lock them up until we find a way to undo the brainwashing" Not that she minded having been programmed to love Ranma. She and the others could stay like this, no problem ! The young Superman and the scooby gang member complied.

"Let's see..." Honey suddenly felt self-conscious. She turned her head to look behind her and saw that the others had grouped together and were looking at the pod's displays, especially at the flashing red words.

Nuku Nuku asked innocently "What does brain damage mean ?"

Rei's voice became colder than usual (and that's quite a feat in itself) "Apparently, this girl's hammer strike was very damaging to Master's cerebellum"

"Hold the phone..." Honey frowned "Actually, 64% of the brain damage is older than... Oh, Kami..." So that's why Ranma Saotome was so dumb and clueless in the manga she had read back Home. Add to this the spotty education he got from his father... Then she saw something else that made her really angry "Oh, %&@$ !!!"

"What ? What !? Is something wrong with Goshujin-sama, desu ?"

"The part of his brain dedicated to the Libido and sexual pleasure is a mass of scar tissue. That means... No nookie for the Master and for us" *sniffle*

The girls froze. Perhaps they had been created artificially and were, except for Rei, part or fully machine but their creators had made them 'fully functional' as a certain android from Tom Paris' world would say. Their programming had instilled the need to pleasure their master in all the senses of the term. And now they found out it wasn't possible !?

There was only one thing to do. With the others nodding in approval, Honey launched the regeneration process.

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(Posted Tue, 08 Apr 2003 23:09)


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