Emperor Ranma of Mongo: If at first you don't succeed [Episode 55878]

by Kestral

Makoto looked over the banks of controls and took charge. This wasn't an airplane, so she could handle it, right?

Okay, she had the skychariot bracketed, now all she had to do was push Circle, Square, Triangle, Left.

Pshhhh pshhh pshhhh went three contrails as they streaked away from her mecha.

Okay, maybe it was Square Circle, Triangle...

Brraaaaapppppp went the large machine gun.

Maybe this button over here?

Crunk went the hull plating as the giant robot leapt off into space.

"Princess Jupiter," radioed Beatrix, "if you look under the console there's an operator's manual."

"Now she tells me," grumbled Makoto.


"Slow down! Slow down!" yelled Uranus as soon as they got down to where they could breathe again. Oh look. They were going past a city. Uranus glanced behind her. Missiles? "GO FASTER! GO FASTER!"


Hastur was confused.

Each of the Titans had been formed in that long-off age by the weaving of powerful elemental magics as they sought to improve their hand in a sort of magical arms race.

Hastur had been born from Kefke Hastur, a scientist who hadn't really been that important or clever, just another mediocre weapons developer who had been full of patriotism and following the lead of other scientists. His experiment had been with a weave of Earth, Spirit, and Shadow magics. When everything had gone wrong and the chain reaction finished, his transformation had been to the 1/2 mile long cockroach that bore his name.

Hastur was a little better off than Dagon or Cthulhu. He didn't have much of a mind, but there was something there that could be confused.

It knew it had to go THAT way. It knew it had to feed, and that to feed it needed to destroy. It knew that prior to the last time it had been leashed, it had run amok and darn little in the way of bronze spearpoints or wood and stone weapons could hurt it.

Now however, it was facing a lot of things which could hurt it.

Hastur emerged several times from the ground only to find bits and pieces of his body getting shot away. Followed by a retreat to underground.

Knowing that it needed to remove the painful things, but denied the chance. It could fly, but as soon as it appeared it was stung.

Finally, Hastur realized what it needed to do. Opening a tunnel, it slunk back from the strange fires used against it and opened its ovipositors. The Spawn Of Hastur were quickened and readied before they finally were unleashed in a cloud.


"Urk!" Sailor Pluto said, looking somewhat perturbed.

"What is that?" Sailor Venus asked as the brown cloud began coming out of the tunnel.

Explosions began to put holes in the cloud.

"They're bugs, lots and lots of three foot long flying spiked cockroaches," reported Sailor Mercury who wasn't scared of cockroaches but looked somewhat nauseated all the same.

"Icky," said Sailor Venus, summing it up quite nicely.

"Burning Mandala, Burning Mandala, Burning Mandala!" responded Sailor Mars from where she was seeing the horde heading her way.

Captain Steiner punched a button. "LISTEN UP YOU LOUTS! Stop using beam weapons. Switch to timed missile fire and area effect weapons!"


Makoto waited carefully as the skychariot came in range again. There!

The line shot out towards the approaching mecha, and then past it.

Twang! Only to get caught on a flange near the controls.

Whip! went the skychariot past the Gunhead.

Zoom! went the skychariot in smaller and smaller circles as it orbitted the Gunhead at high speeds and the line was slowly wrapped around Makoto's mecha.

Clank! went the skychariot at it became tangled up with the Gunhead.

"Uh oh," said Makoto, Usagi, and Haruka at the identical same time.

"AAAAAAAAAA!" said Makoto, Usagi, and Haruka at the exact same time as they went into freefall.

"Thumpf!" went the parachutes as automatic systems went to work.

As their "plunge to certain doom" became a "drift down to Bug Central", Haruka turned as best she could to Usagi's position. "My princess. I have sworn to serve you and do everything I can to keep you safe. If you ever do this again, I will spank you so hard that you shall not be able to sit down at cockpit without remembering this even if a thousand years passes."

"Actually, I'm pretty sure I'll remember this," assured Usagi.

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(Posted Thu, 03 Jul 2003 12:28)


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