Ryouga's Dilbert Hell: The Quest for Shampoo 119 [Episode 5754]

by Jamil Nate

Ryoga wept and screamed, bombarded by the horrendous visions of the hated Ranma Saotome getting all the girls and wallowing in happiness while his counterparts would only get misery.

It wasn't fair! Every time it looked like Ranma was going to suffer or lose, something would happen to make it allright.

Huh? What's this? thought Ryoga at the sight of a scene shown by one of the myriad of screens on the walls, roof and ceiling. It looked like another deity or being of cosmic power was going to make an alteration in this alternate Ranma's life. In this now changed timeline, everything happened like in the original history until a particular incident...

*****

Kasumi had heard shuffling noises in the Saotomes' room and entered to investigate. She found Ranma preparing his backpack "Oh my, Ranma-kun... What are you doing?"

"It's obvious, Kasumi!" declared Ranma as he shouldered his backpack "I'm going to China! I have to find the shampoo formula 119 to cure Akane!"

"Really!?" squealed Nabiki who had appeared from nowhere "Will you please bring me back souvenirs?" Soun was right behind her "I'd like a few cigarette packs if you don't mind..." Genma-Panda was also there with one of his trademark wooden signs [Boy, you'd better bring me some bottles of alcohol]. Ranma's face fell in disbelief. What were they thinking? That he was going on vacation?

Akane was looking at the scene with a puzzled look, holding P-Chan close to her "That boy... Why is he doing all this?"

Ranma had enough and walked up to Akane "Akane... I swear I'll return with your cure. Wait for me..." Then he was gone.

A few minutes later, Ranma was running in the streets of Nerima, thinking about his situation How am I going to get to China? I suppose I could swim like Oyaji and me did last time but...

He was so caught up in his musings that he didn't see Shampoo hanging from the lamppost in his way. The results were predictable *WHAM!*

"Ow, my head..." Ranma had fallen to the ground with a nasty bump. He stood up only to see a knocked up Shampoo and a broken bottle on the pavement "Damn..." He checked her for injuries and found none. The amazon was made of sterner stuff than most martial artists he had crossed paths with after all. Knowing she would be okay and wake up on her own, he took off at his best running speed, resuming his quest.

Ranma ran for a few hours before setting up camp. It was the first time he was travelling alone and felt a little nervous at the prospect (not that he would admit it). When he woke up the next day, he knew how he would travel to China:

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(Posted Fri, 27 Jun 2003 22:15)


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