Restart Field Trip : XXXenophile's Sinister Plan! [Episode 65496]

by Kestral

His voluptuous assistant also chuckled evilly. "Does this mean we're finally getting to the 'Sex & D&D' segment?"

"It's certainly possible," admitted Fhil, "even if we're honestly-no-relation to those characters. Yet this is where we're supposed to give some expository dialogue to reveal our evil plans."

"Why?" Dixie Cupp asked. "It's just you and me so far, and we know them already."

"It's in the mad scientist guidelines," said Fhil with a shrug. "See!"

Dixie looked at the indicated page.

Mad Scientist Guidebook . . . . . . page 9 cute mascots are optional, though preference should be given to those who are sarcastic or bitter. 14 - Expository dialogue should be given whenever the mad scientist's plans are about to be begun. 15 - Always put in one secret escape route that a five year old child can stumble across. 16 - Death rays and other diabolical devices (chapter 15) should always be clearly labelled. 17 - Alway's target the hero's mascot first. They're usually cute and fluffy and who needs that when you're preparing to destroy the world or rule it. 18 - The less threatening they look, the less competent, the more likely that this is the hero.

"Well whatta ya know," said Dixie. "Okay. So even though we know it. What's our diabolical plot to deal with these schoolkids?"

"I'm glad you asked that Dixie!" Fhil moved to one of the large pullropes and tugged on it. "As you can see our first busload of victims students is about to arrive and we've chosen these two as our victims."

Picture of schoobus telescopes in to show Hiroshi and Daisuke.

"Why them?" said Dixie, honestly puzzled.

"Because they're idiots who serve no useful purpose," admitted Fhil. "How many times can you spell #$$@*& before it gets old?"

"So what are we going to..." suggestively paused Dixie, "do with them?"

"Just this," said Fhil, activating his Carnelian Death Ray. "Ooops. Wrong switch. Here we go! This will turn the two of them: "

• into Green Orion Slave Girls. Maybe I can send them to Viacom and they'll get the hint and we can get some decent plotlines on Enterprise.
• From oversexed idiotic men to cute oversexed idiotic girls. Cliche perhaps, but fun.
• Oops. It just turned them into Ataru Morobishi. Times two. Oh well, this still might be amusing.
• something else

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(Posted Mon, 25 Aug 2003 14:18)

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