To answer the slightly bimbo-like Weaponsmaster, the Dark Elf War Mage known to many as Karia let out a yawn as she stretched backwards, an audible cracking hear. “Stop whining. We still got a ways to walk if we’re to make it to Trine.”
“But it’s almost nightfall!” Lily complained. “There’s no way we’ll make it there before daybreak tomorrow!”
“Daybreak at the pace YOU’RE going,” Karia complained. God, this girl complained and made them stop every ten minutes since they started. How could someone so undisciplined be a Weaponsmaster, Karia would never know.
“But Kariaaaaaa...” The blonde, ditzy, bimbo of a Weaponsmaster whined. “You can’t blame that on me. All those small little, lovable, adorable animals we passed along the way were so cute, and need help, and food, and warmth, and petting, and-”
“WILL YOU SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!?” Karia snapped. Gods damned, she just SO wanted to shove a lightning bolt of this blonde’s bubbly, bouncy ass.
But then the Dark Elf soon regretted yelling. The fluffy bangs of the blonde’s hair seemed to flip up. Karia could see that Lily’s eyes were watering up, and...
“WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! YOU’RE SO MEAN TO ME, KARIA! YOU... YOU... MEANIE!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”
Karia was tempted to just uproot a tree then and there as to hopefully smash the ditzy Weaponsmaster into a fine, mushy paste, when she noticed something about the area somehow seemed... ‘Off’.
“What the nine hells?” Karia muttered to herself as many small, furry, and uberly-cute animals worthy of Disney’s Bambi started to gather around the area, with a look of hate in their eyes worthy of a rabid Tellitubby.
It was then that the truth hit Karia like a sack of bricks. Karia may have been an okay kappoierra fighter, but her specialty lay in animal summonings, since she was so damn empathic with the little critters.
And all these little critters were attracted by the waves of sadness that the whiner, er, Weaponsmaster of with ‘wittle wuvables’ as she so eloquently put it, was currently giving off.
“I am SO dead,” Karia groaned as a good-sized brigade of chipmunks and squirrels dropped down from a nearby tree.
(------)
The Weaponsmaster and head of Jade’s Giant Clan, Brunhildagard ‘Mumsey’ Brigand was not a happy camper.
Actually, that would be an understatement.
Right now, the Weaponsmaster was out for BLOOD!
Mumsey knew about what the smilodon was capable off. After all, all the legends had been quite explicit. And Mumsey had a bit of fear in her heart when it came to dealings with the weresmilodon.
However, the smilodon had hurt her husband, her ‘naughty ninja of nookie’!
“HE’S DEAD!” Mumsey growled as she sharpened her axe. Solid mythril, and plated with the purest silver she could get her hands on. She was going to give that over-fanged werecat such a beating!
And so Mumsey continued to work long into the night, behind her were the remains of a training dummy that suspiciously looked like a certain black-furred werecat... Or could have been if it wasn’t missing it’s arms, had a sword through it’s chest, an axe in it’s head, and more than a few arrow sticking out of it.
"... Did you just call me horny?"
See other episodes by Red Priest of the 17th Order
(Posted Tue, 20 Jan 2004 22:58)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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