The Journey to Red: Pantha Writes: It's so very cold.. so cold.. [Episode 90170]

It's been awhile since I wrote anything in this journal, and I'm sorry for that. My life hasn't gotten any easier since the last time I wrote, only harder. Much harder.

There has been a bright spot in this hell I've found myself in. Theodore Diggers. Despite a certain annoyance, which I'll explain later, Theo and I have been getting along very well. We've gone on a few dates, kissed a few times, and we hold hands constantly. It's been nice, and not anything I expected to ever come from my partnership with him.

Which brings never-ending frustration. Theo and I may have gone out on a few dates, we may have kissed and done some.. naughty touching, but he doesn't seem to think I'm his girlfriend. He reminds me of Ranma, in that he's as dense as a mule when it comes to some things, or should I say, when it comes to 'us'.

Ranma.. he's an asshole .. dick head .. never ending annoyance to me. We do get along, so long as my relationship with Theo isn't brought up, or I do anything to remind him of the Ryden incident. It's really confusing me. Thinking back, to all the times Ranma would pull away from Theo and I to give us time alone, I can't help but think he did it with the intent of bringing Theo and I together. But now.. now he just seems to drive us apart with every opportunity.

For the last three weeks we have been tracking the wagon from Lirith. We lost it for a moment when it entered the Icor swamp. Theo suspected it was some magical interference dealing with the swamp itself, but that didn't make me feel any better, nor did it help brighten Ranma's sour mood.

In this group, a moment could mean anything from five seconds to five days. We didn't pick up the track until we passed through the swamp, but by then all the progress we had made in catching up to it had been lost, once again we were playing catch up.

I think we stopped in Dri for a night or so, to restock and resupply before setting out again. It's been so long, I can't remember that far back to clearly. I think I slept for the most part, but it's all been a daze for me.

End Journal Entry Four

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Begin Journal Entry Five.

The Jag Mountains. I've heard many things about this place, and none of them good. Anyone seeking to scale the walls would find himself or herself hard pressed. At the base and traveling a good mile or so up, it's rumored the walls were smooth as a baby’s bottom. If you some how managed to get past that, you would find yourselves in almost the exact opposite. The walls would become jagged; to the point it will rip through your skin as easily as if you didn’t have any. These were just rumors, after all, and I'm somewhat glad we didn't have to learn the whole truth to these rumors thus far.

We moved South from Dri, I think, following the base of the Mountain for many days while Theodore tracked the wagon as best he could. The group's moral was starting to become thin, and arguments were starting to fly rampant between Ranma and myself. I try, oh how I try not to antagonize him, but he just makes me so angry I can't help myself.

At least after we fight Theo always comes and talks to me, to explain things. I'm happy he never blames me for what happened with Ranma, but I'm also sad I can never bring myself to apologize to him for my words, or for upsetting his admitted best friend.

Three days from the Dale, that’s when we finally found what we were looking for. The wagon had been abandoned in a cave lining the Jag Mountains, the horses seemed to have been let loose, and for the life of me I couldn't figure out why they would abandon the wagon there of all places. Theo suggested it was deliberate, that they knew they were being tracked, and I had been inclined to agree with them, until Ranma...

Until Ranma tripped over his own feet and hit his head against the wall. It would figure he'd find a secret panel that opened up a secret passageway in that cave. He swore he fell with intent, but Theo and I know better. That must have been the first time the three of us had laughed with no malicicious intent in weeks.

It's something I missed. The laughter. Those first three months are almost like a dream to me now. So far away, so distant, but I can remember them all as clear as if they happened yesterday. Maybe.. when this Trioca nonsense is finished, maybe we can laugh like that again.

End Journal Entry Five

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Begin Journal Entry Six.

How long have we been in these caves? I don't know, but it's been too long. I can't even remember what the sun looks like, or the clear skies, or the lively grasslands. I wonder if this is what hell is like, and if I've already died with out even knowing it.

It's cold. It's always cold. The warmth from the above world never reaches these caves; it's so cold... I have fur, and I'm freezing every minute were down here. Maybe I can convince Ranma and Theo to share body warmth, to do something..

I'm tired.

End Journal Entry Six.

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Begin Journal Entry Seven.

After so many twists and turns in this cave, after back tracking and loosing our way many times, we have finally found where we needed to go. We had no guide, nothing to track our direction. I'm amazed we even made it out of those caves alive.

I'm glad, very glad though. I don't want to die. I don't want Theo or Ranma to die because of this. Because of the actions they took when they released me from my slavery. I know it's not my fault, I know it's no ones fault, it's just the way I feel.

We managed to find what looks like, at what Ranma noted as a 'Geo Front'. Theo and I didn't have any inkling what to call the large dome of natural plantlife we found within the mountains, and frankly after the hell we just went through, none of us cared.

We bathed. Dear gods for the first time in WEEKS we bathed. It was a maddening rush; we were all so happy, so desperate for warm clean waters to wash away the filth and sweat we had become covered in.

Seeing Theo and Ranma naked was a bonus, and I admit with a very guilty pleasure I'll treasure that memory for as long as I live, and I'm sure they will do the same when I joined them.

Awkwardness with each other was lost some where in that cave. In that dark cave were the only things we could rely upon was each other.

Ranma kissed me. A full, honest to the Almighty kiss. Not of passion, but of jubilation.

Theo's kiss on the other hand....

There is a building in the far distance. Maybe building is too weak a word. It's tall, almost like a castle but composed of completely different materials. Metal maybe, but I'm not sure.

As we moved closer to this structure, Ranma and Theo both have been detecting something very very wrong. They couldn't describe it in detail, but they did offer the explanation 'Imagine a swirling vortex of darkness, you will understand what we see'.

I'm not looking forward to this castle.