Ashi Ranma: Kuno Baka; The Great Witch Hunt! [Episode 92800]

by Matdeception

Nabiki cursed as she ran. This morning was just too bizarre! She had been shocked into inaction, and she cursed herself for it. Whatever was happening to Ranma had thrown her completely off balance. Seeing the clueless jock deck his fiancée shortly before nearly choking her father to death really turned her world upside down. She didn't even want to think about what he did to Kasumi. The sight of the normally traditional and happy woman falling to her knees hugging herself and shivering in disgust, or was that delight, really rocked her world.

At least she was still far from being late. Still, as far as she was concerned, she was late. School was simply a means to an end, the real money she made happened before, during lunch, and right after school.

Running up to the schoolyard, she breathed out a sigh of relief. Ranma was here, and aside from the new get up and the pipe he was carrying, nothing seemed out of the norm. He certainly wasn't clobbering Kuno's skull in, and that was always a plus.

Sparing the small battle a glance, she made her way through the thinly gathered crowd towards the school.

***

Ranma parried the Kuno's thrust with his pipe, back stepping and either parrying or dodging the swings while he waited patiently for the right moment to spring his plan. He spotted Nabiki entering the schoolyard and grinned.

The plan had been hastily put together, coming to him in a moment of divine inspiration when Kuno opened up their annual morning brawl with a shout disclaiming him as a foul sorcerer. "It's about time she got a taste of her own medicine." he thought viciously, blocking a strike and forcing it down, where he stepped on the blade while lashing out with a knuckled strike at the Kendoist's wrists.

Predictable, Kuno let the sword go as pain erupted in his wrists. Just as predictably, the pigtailed youth flipped overhead, twisting in mid air and landing right behind him. He dropped the pipe, and grabbed Kuno around the neck tightly, kicking out his legs and forcing him to his knees.

This was going to be fun.

"Kuno..."

***

"Nabiki!" Irama gasped, "What happened to you!"

The mercenary Tendo spared the peppy Irama a glance, before shrugging it off and making way towards the window, "Forget it. How's the fight going?"

Irama glanced between Nabiki and the window, before anxiously responding, "It's weird Nabiki-sempai! Ranma has Kuno down, but he isn't finishing the fight like he usually does!"

Nabiki frowned, putting her school bag at her desk before walking up to the window and peering out.

Ranma had Kuno in a chokehold maneuver; the kendoist was on his knees and trying ineffectually to peel the strong arms that were so thoroughly squeezing the life out of him.

"What the hell is wrong with you!" Nabiki grimaced. She wasn't an idiot. The Ranma of yesterday practically disappeared with Akane's Mallet strike. She wasn't the brightest when it came to cranial trauma, but she had experienced the effects of such things in the past. What with Akane and the 'Ranko' persona that had appeared because of a similar incident. Still.. maybe he was just mad? Really really mad?

***

"Kuno...." Ranma cried in a whisper, his voice quivering, "Help me.... I'm cursed..."

Kuno tried to shout out in glee! Yes! The foul sorcerer finally admitted he belonged to the dark arts! Oh truly this is the day the heavens have chosen to shine upon the noble scion of House Kuno!

"Nabiki.." his voice tensed, his body quivering and strengthening its hold over Kuno's throat, ".. she has a spell on me Kuno! I've tried to fight it.. to warn some one.. anyone.. she's too strong!"

Kuno struggled against the bonds that held him, while mentally he was as confused as say.. well... as say a Kuno.

"She.. she enspelled me... to keep you away from Akane... she won't let me go.. she makes me.. makes me do things..." he sniffed, tears rolling down his eyes, not that Kuno could see it. "This morning.. she made me hurt Akane.. because.. because Akane tried to run to you last night... I.. I can't stand it anymore Kuno! Destroy her! End the madness! Claim your loves!" he exclaimed suddenly, letting go and stumbling away from Kuno, hands clenching his head as if he was in serious pain. He said, only loud enough for Kuno to hear, "She's doing it again! She's forcing the spell! Kuno.. ah.. help..."

Kuno held his throat, grasping for breath. Just what the hell was going on? Nabiki a Sorceress? Well.. she was a snake, a nefarious person who used the love of others to make a dastardly profit.

Ranma fell to his knees, screaming in pain, "NO! STAY AWAY! NOT AGAIN!"

Kuno frowned, regaining his bokken and staring at his weakened enemy. He monetarily pondered ending the wretch's existence, before he caught glimpse of a certain Tendo staring intently at the fight, a twisted evil scowl on her features.

Suddenly everything snapped into place. Nabiki always watched whenever he fought Ranma. She was there the day Ranma tried to explain some hidden knowledge about the Pigtailed Girl, only her appearance forced the enspelled lower classman to shut up. It was she who always had numerous photos of the pig-tailed girl, even though she was rarely seen.

Steam began to shoot from Kuno's ears as he seethed. "Yes, it's clear now." he thought in rage, "That foul enchantress Nabiki Tendo is keeping the pigtailed girl and Akane away from me as to destroy such fair flowers of womanhood and steal my families heritage! It is a testament to her evils that he was so blind as to see this poor noble soul wallowing in agony before me as the true evil!

Kuno raised his bokken towards the window, pointed directly at Nabiki. His eyes gleamed hatefully, hair shifting and blowing heroically as a sudden wind picked up in the courtyard. "NABIKI TENDO! FOUL WITCH, I SHALL BURN YOU AT THE STAKE!

Nabiki blinked her eyes once, twice, and thrice. "Excuse me?"

Ranma smirked, watching as the baka ran into the school screaming bloody murder. He spared Nabiki, who was staring at him in horror a cruel sadistic smile, before blowing her a kiss and winking, "Have fun!"

***

Nabiki never planned to use this. It wasn't designed to hide from the likes of Kuno, or Ranma for that matter. Still, as she pushed aside one of the bookcases in the library, revealing a hidden room behind it, she thought hiding was the best bet to surviving hurricane Ranma and Twister Kuno.

As she closed the bookcase, sealing her within the cold dark room, she had a suddenly gut wrenching thought. That Insurance scam she ran earlier was going to go bust, but in a bad way. With no Ranma to avenge the policyholders if they got beat up/hurt/ect.ect., they weren't going to pay their fee's anymore.

***

Everyone in school stopped and listened with a bored look in their eyes as the intercom crackled to life.

"Now hear this," Kuno spoke out in even tones. "We have a witch amongst our fair student body. A black-magic sorceress who has used us all!"

Numerous eyes shifted to Miyo, who shook her head and made the universal 'Looney' symbol. That placated the student body, and they tuned Kuno back in.

After a time, Kuno continued. "Therefore, I implore you, the student body, assist a Noble Samurai such as I! She hath used her foul magicks against us for the last time! Stolen our hard earned heritage! She must be burned!!"

Daisuke blinked, "Heritage?"

Hiroshi cracked a grin, "I think he means money, man."

There were murmurs circulating about the student body, most not believing a word Kuno said or feeling terribly motivated to go on a modern day witch-hunt. They didn't like Nabiki either, but that was taking it a tad to far...

Kuno chimed in, seemingly as an after thought, "Whoever helps me capture the foul sorceress Nabiki, shall personally receive 100,000 yen for their valiant efforts!"

... but 100,000 yen was 100,000 yen. The Nabiki hunt was on!

***

Ranma gawked. He hadn't been expecting the whole school to join in. Not that he was complaining, but it just wasn't expected.

Mr. Fujihara, the Gym instructor, screamed as he lead a large mob mixed with students and Faculty alike, "Find her! Burn her! Destroy the witch! No more 3/4 of our paychecks going to pay her off! To Arms! Students, Faculty unite!"

Ranma sweat dropped, shaking his head in disdain as he made way through the throngs of suddenly angry students and teachers all out for Nabiki's hide. "I wonder what Ms. Hinako's doing right now?" he suddenly grinned evilly. If he knew her, she was still forcing her students to attend her class...

***

... Unless she was in child form.

Ranma grunted, glaring at the black board with a hastily, and messy, scrawled sentence. "Class Cancelled. Nabiki hunting."

"Geesh." he sighed. Maybe he went a little to far with this. Not that he cared one spit for Nabiki, it was just making his job of tracking victims of his revenge down harder.

Shrugging, he opened the door and stalked amongst the students, whispering evilly, "Be vary vary quite, I'm huntin Hinako-bunny!"

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(Posted Tue, 17 Feb 2004 03:55)


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