"Something wrong?"
All in all, Haruka was actually taking this better then anyone who knew her might have expected.
Of course, that might change as Ranma revealed the reason for his sudden panic was the seven OTHER girls in the room with them, all looking to be in a similar condition to hers. And they were ALL wearing wedding bands like the one on her hand. "Take a look around."
Looking around as directed, the first thing she noted was Michiru lying next to her, looking as dignified as possible for someone in her condition, and lying on the other side of Ranma was Hotaru, who looked to have gone through another growth spurt, and now appeared the same age as the Inners, with a VERY big smile on her face. And speaking of the Inners, there they all were, lying all over the floor of the room, wearing nothing but the blankets that looked to have only been laid over them recently. Only one person was missing.
"Huh, everyone but Setsuna is here."
"That's because I woke up first, Haruka." spoke up the aformentioned woman, standing in the doorway wearing nothing but a bath robe. "Where do you think the blankets came from?"
"I... see."
"Um, Setsuna-san was it? Do y'know what happened here? I'd kinda like to know why I'm gonna die before it actually happens, y'know?" asked Ranma, who after his initial panic, had settled into the calm that only a man who now faces death and knows that there is nothing he can do to change it can achieve.
"Die? Aren't you being a little melodramatic?" asked Haruka.
"Not really. With the way my life goes, chances are someone outside this room already knows what's happened, which means that Nabiki knows or will know within the next half hour. Of course, that means that she's immediately going to sell that information to half of Nerima, and then it's only a matter of time until one of the Fiancés or one of my rivals shows up, and then that's when it hits the fan."
"Fiancés? As in more than one? How do you manage that?"
"I think that we should leave any explanations until everyone is up." interupted Setsuna. "This could take some time, and I don't think that any of us want to explain anything more than once."
Of course, as soon as the words left her mouth, the first of the girls began stirring.
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One hour, seven freakouts (Well five actually, Makoto had just kinda sat there and drooled for about five minutes, and Minako's cry of "SWEETO!" before glomping onto Ranma had him just sitting there muttering something about shrivelled up perverts and how they should not be allowed to breed for about the same amount of time, and probably would have gone on longer if Setsuna hadn't assured Ranma that Minako and Happosai were not related), an additional hour and a half of explanations, nine Senshi transformations, and numerous demonstrations of a Jusenkyo curse later...
"So let's see if we've got this all straight. You gals are the Sailor Senshi, who've been fighting Youma, Aliens, and various other Menaces from Beyond for the past two or so years? You're originally from a 'Moon Kingdom' in a time called the 'Silver Millenium' where you were all the princesses of your planets, and all died, except Pluto, when that kingdom fell, and were re-incarneted in the present when the forces that originally destroyed the Moon Kingdom came back. Excepting Sailor Moon, you've all died at least once during the fights, but have been brought back to life by Sailor Moon after the fighting?"
Nods all around.
"OK. So you, your name is Ami Mizuno, a juku student who wants to be a doctor like your mother, and you're also Sailor Mercury?" Ranma clarified, indicating Ami, who nodded. "You're Minako Aino, also known as Sailor Venus, you want to be an idol singer, and are 100% not related to Happosai?" again, a nod from the indicated girl. "You're Rei Hino, a miko, and Sailor Mars. Makoto Kino, a Martial Artist who wants to open a bakery/flower shop, and are Sailor Jupiter. Hotaru Tomoe, you want to be a nurse, and are also Sailor Saturn. Haruka Ten'oh, professional racer, and Sailor Uranus. Michiru Kaioh, professional musician, and Sailor Neptune. Setsuna Meioh, school councilor, Guardian of the Gates of Time, and Sailor Pluto." once again, nods from all indicated girls, and one woman. "And you're Usagi Tsukino, also called Sailor Moon, their leader and princess, and future Queen of the World."
"That's right. And you're Ranma Saotome, heir to the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts, with a curse that makes you change into a girl with cold water, right?" this time it's Ranma's turn to nod.
"The cause of which is an idiot of a father who decided that training at a 'cursed' training ground was a good idea, despite almost all his previous "Good Ideas" turning out to be really bad ideas." put in Setsuna. "Also suffers from severe Ailurophobia, caused once again by one of his father's "Good Ideas", involving a pit of starving cats, into which he was repeatedly thrown, tied up, strung with fish sausage and coated in fish oil, when he was just six years old." again a nod, and a small shiver of fear at the mention of the dreaded Neko-ken, from Ranma, as well as looks of horror and disgust from all nine Senshi, all harbouring thoughs of certain not-nice things that could be done to a certain Panda.
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In another district, said certain Panda, currently sitting at one end of a Shogi board, sneazed.
"Are you feeling alright, Saotome? That's the 107th time in the last hour and a half." (Yes, he's been counting, don't ask me why.)
'It's nothing Tendo' *flip* 'I'm a Martial Artist, there's' *flip* 'no way I could get sick' (Don't ask me how he managed to get three messages onto a two sided sign, I don't think that anyone's managed to work out just how he does it yet.)
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"Also has a lack of social skills, including probably the worst case of Foot-in-Mouth disease ever encountered, as well as a lack of experience in dealing with anything to do with the opposite sex, due to, again, his father, who raised him on the road for ten years, teaching him nothing but Martial Arts, to the exclusion of anything else." this coming from Michiru, with yet another nod from Ranma.
"Also has a number of Fiancés, current count puts the total known at 49, all arranged by his father, usually for food, the smallest amount being a bowl of rice, a fish, and two pickles. Lumped in together with those Fiancés are a Chinese Amazon, who claims that they are married because the laws of her village state that any outsider male who defeates a female of the village must marry that female, despite those laws not being recognised outside the village, and an at-least-slightly insane gymnast, who is currently obsessed with him." this from Haruka, with a nod and sigh from Ranma.
"Has a number of Rivals, almost all who claim to want to kill him for some reason or another, like supposedly stealing their bread, or a girl who they claim is rightfully theirs, despite that girl having no interest in them whatsoever." piped up Hotaru, with yet another nod from Ranma, along with a roll of his eyes.
"Despite all this, is well respected in the rest of the Martial Arts community, and indeed the community in general. Is considered the only member of the so called 'Nerima Wrecking Crew' to actually stick to the code of honor that they claim to follow. Is acknowledged as one of the three most powerful Martial Artists in the world, along with Terry Bogard and Ryu Hoshin. Has defeated many powerful foes of his own, including an Eight-Headed Orochi, a Dragon Prince, and a Phoenix God." Makoto's turn to speak, with a nod and smirk from Ranma.
"What can I say? That's my life."
"Indeed. It seems that everyone in this room has lived a life that's not exactly ordinary. I can understand you wanting to go out and just get drunk." put in Rei, with nods from all assembled.
"Which brings us to this mess." starts up Minako "Ranma here has all the crap that usually happens to him in a week pile onto him in the space of a single day, which sends him out in search of an escape. At the same time, we find out that Mamoru..."
"That's Usagi's ex-boyfriend, right? The guy who runs around throwing roses and making Kuno-esque speaches, Tuxedo Kamen?"
"That's him. Anyway, we find out that after he dumps Usagi for the fifth time two weeks ago, runs off to America to study at University there, and ends up getting into a fight and being killed by some evil Martial Artist who calls himself Akuma last week. Of course Usagi-chan gets upset by this, as do the rest of us, so we all decide that a drink or five sounds good too. Then the next thing we know, here we are."
"Yes, here being all nine of us being married to Ranma here. Plus, it's a legal marriage, because only three days ago, in an effort to sort out the mess, the Diet, with backing from the Emperor himself, passed a law allowing Ranma to marry multiple girls, as long as it was all in the one ceremony, and only one ceremony would be allowed. We can't get this marriage anulled, because it's already been consumated. Plus, even if it hadn't, we still wouldn't be able to, because that law also states that 'Till Death do us Part', means exactly that. No divorce allowed." this coming from Ami now. "Plus, according to Setsuna, these rings are actually from the Silver Millenium, and have some sort of binding spell on them, which does explain why we don't seem to be freaking out as much as we should, especially Haruka and Michiru."
"You're right, I don't really feel opposed to the situation, but I know that I usually would." replied Michiru, with a nod from Haruka.
"So, our main problem's are going to be the Fiancés and Rivals out for all of our heads, right?" asked Makoto.
"That's right." replied Ami. "But it's not like we don't have a claim on Ranma already, right?"
"Right" replied Ranma, "'cause you all got engagements to me as well, thanks to my baka oyaji. Didn't really surprise me when it came out."
"Indeed." Setsuna spoke up again. "Ami has one from when Ranma's father offered it in exchange for medical treatment after the disaster with the Neko-ken. Minako has one from when Ranma's father offered it up in a bet on a horse race with her father. Usagi has one from when her father bought Genma the sake that he later used with Soun Tendo to drug and imprison Happosai. Rei's was exchanged with her Grandfather for a weeks worth of meditation training at the shrine for Ranma. Makoto's comes from when her parents provided Genma shelter when he was hiding from the police, after he lied to them about it. Hotaru gets one as an appeasment after Genma accidently ruins one of Professor Tomoe's earlier experiments. This is two years before the lab explosion, for the record. Anyway, Haruka's was sold for 20,000 yen, which was then used to buy the drug that was used in the sake that he had previously been aquired from Kenji Tsukino. Then there's Michiru's, where her parents supplied Genma with a months worth of Instant Ramen, which he never did tell Ranma about, and finished off in about a week. And finally my own, which I aquired just in case a situation like this happened. All it cost me was paying off Genma's bar tab, and pretending to be my own mother."
"OK, so we all have a valid claim on him, plus we're already married to him, so if we take this to the courts, we can hopefully get the Fiancés, and possibly the rivals to back off." said Ami.
"We can try, but I don't like the chances of them actually listening." replied Michiru. "From what i've heard of them, they'll probably twist things around in their own minds and keep on doing whatever they like. That could get ugly."
"Good point. So we'll need to come up with a bigger plan. Can anyone think of anything else we'll need to worry about?" asked Ami.
"Well, there is the fact that with Mamoru out of the picture, Ranma now has to take over as the Prince of Earth." replied Setsuna.
"Oh, I see. Wait, WHAT!?" burst out Ami, with similar reactions from the other Senshi, and Ranma.
"Oh, didn't I mention that earlier?" asked Setsuna, just a bit too innocently.
"Uh, no, ya didn't." replied Ranma. "How come I gotta take over?"
"Simple" answered Setsuna, "Ranma here is..."
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(Posted Tue, 25 Aug 2009 18:26)
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