A damp, angry, and above all female Saotome Ranma sat herself down on the grassy slope of a hill overlooking the challenge log, still disgusted over the outcome of her father Genma's latest scheme. While Genma was a more than adequate teacher in the Art, the last dozen years had proven him an abject failure at teaching most anything else - like keeping in touch with reality. It had been sheer luck that the "neko-ken" hadn't driven Ranma insane...
Ranma thanked his lucky star that her mother had come along with them in the beginning, if only to set a positive example. It was too bad she had had to leave for home after a mere two years, though Ranma wouldn't have traded the little sister she'd been exchanging letters with for anything in the world... Interesting how easy it was to start thinking of herself in the feminine form - it had to be the stupid curse. She was male, damnit!
Her reflections were interrupted by the start of another bout on the log - between a hulking brute of a woman and a girl Ranma's own age, unless she missed her guess. The younger combatant was well rounded, with a figure to die for - if you were the type to do so - with deep purple hair that reached the small of her back. She was also fighting rings around her opponent, despite the linear venue - mostly by using the same type of aerial style the Saotome school too favored. Finally, after a two-minute bout that had ended up that long solely because the better combatant had willed it so, the purple-haired beauty was declared the winner - not only of the bout, but of the tournament itself. Cheers erupted from the gathered crowds - and then fizzled out abruptly as everyone turned to stare in Ranma's direction - no, off to her side. Following suit, Ranma turned to look - and groaned. Trust her father to not be able to control himself in the presence of food...
The champion's feast, which had been laid out on an array of tables on Ranma's right, had been dented considerably by the fat, ugly giant panda which was her father's cursed form. That there were signs designating the feast as belonging to the champion hadn't mattered one bit - and the possible excuse of a language barrier wouldn't hold any water at all, as Japanese used the same ideograms. No, the only way to put this down was "temporary insanity", though Ranma doubted the "temporary" part. In an case, Genma would have to lie in the bed he'd made for himself - Ranma didn't feel at all obliged to defend him from the consquences of his own stupidity. She'd done that too many times already, and she owed him for Jusenkyo. So she just sat back and let the horde of angry women trash the fat idiot.
Of course, Ranma's taste in punishment did have limits, and when she overheard the champion whose feast had been ruined discuss the placement of the impending panda-skin wall hanging with a short, wizened woman who pogoed around on a stick, she decided to intervene. There was such a thing as going too far, after all.
"Maybe in front of the fireplace, then - that way we won't have to trim the hide down too much," the champion was musing.
"Perhaps, great granddaughter. Or you might donate it to the temple - that would increase your standing with them further. One must always keep in mind the political effects of ones decision. It's a necessary habit in a leader," the wizened crone advised.
There was a brief moment of silence after this, and Ranma decided this was her cue to butt in. Respectfully, of course.
"Excuse this one, honored Elder, madam Champion," Ranma greeted, bowing deeply to each woman in turn, "but this one is afraid that this one has a prior claim on the beast."
"Ohoh! How so, young lady?" the older of the pair inquired, her eyes sparkling. The younger woman settled for a fairly mild glare.
"This one is afraid that the panda is a victim of the Pools of Sorrow, and this one's father. This one's honor will not allow allow his death as a common beast, much as he deserves it." Ranma knew her Mandarin was archaic, but the old-fashioned speech patterns did convey her respect better than the contemporary version would have - or at least, that was Ranma's intention. The crone's eyes narrowed, though.
"The fool's crimes are serious, child. Would you have him walk free without punishment? Our laws demand his life, one way or the other, for this blatant disregard for custom and propriety," the old lady thundered, locking her gimlet-like gaze on Ranma.
"No, no! Punishment must be meted out, but must it be so harsh? My mother and younger sister would be sorely disappointed were I to come home without him," Ranma pleaded, not noticing the masculine pronoun slip out in her stress. The old woman did not, however. After a long, searching stare, she smiled toothily.
"I'll tell you what, Sonny Boy - I'll make you a bargain. One life for one life," she intoned.
Jaws dropped - both Ranma's and the champions. Before Ranma had time to form a reply, the crone continued.
"In return for your father's life, one child, by you, for my great-granddaughter." The old woman gestured to the champion, was finally cottoning on.
"But great-grandmother! The mission?" the purple-haired woman sputtered, as the implications struck her.
"Fear not, daughter of my heart. If I'm not completely mistaken, your mission will not be incompatible with this deal. For is not your name Saotome Ranma, son of Saotome Genma, who was once a disciple of the Demon Happosai?" The last was obviously meant for Ranma, so she straightened out to her full length.
"Yes, that is my name, and my lineage. Know that it is my quest, laid on to me by my mother and father, to destroy the demon," she informed them with as great dignity as she could muster, considering the situation. The younger woman's eyes narrowed, while the old crone smiled in satisfaction.
"See, Xian Pu - no conflict at all. One child, upon the completion of your quest. Until then, the elder Saotome will be your slave, to ensure his good behaviour."
Neither Ranma nor Xian Pu could find any major objections to that, and the discussion soon devolved into the details of the bargain. What little hesitation Xian Pu had had toward the bargain quickly evaporated once the curse was demonstrated, and as they say, that was that.
Ranma and Genma stayed in the village of the Women Hero Tribe for a little over two months after their original arrival, training and getting to know their future traveling partner. Genma had objected rather strenously to the terms of the bargain at first, until the alternative had been pointed out. After that, he'd kept quiet, lest Xian Pu be tempted to forgo the deal, and settle for his hide. For himself, Ranma was more than happy with the way things were turning out - he'd wanted a leash on Genma for years, but going against one's father was simply not done, regardless of the reasons. This way, it had been done neatly - faced with slavery or death, Genma would choose slavery any day of the week, and be very happy for the choice.
The wizened old crone - named Kuh Lon, of all things - had turned out to be a font of information. Not only regarding Happosai, the target of this little quest, but on old techniques and things. Ranma had picked up quite the repertoire over the years, and was happy to exchange a few lesser known ones for Kuh Lon's teaching. While he had long since surpassed the need for the "Imperial Sweet Chestnuts Roaring over an Open Fire" technique, the training method used for the "Breaking Point Technique" had given him ideas. And the "Heavenly Dragon Ascension Blast" was awesome, if somewhat constrained in its application. He'd have to work on that.
In return, he'd taught a bit of this and a bit of that - often against his fathers heartfelt objections, for which the old man usually received a knock on the head and an admonishment to keep his mouth shut while adressing his betters. An improved method for speed training, many tricks to pull in an extended aerial fight, even a last ditch variation of the Saotome "Ultimate technique", by which a substantial portion of one's ki was expended ínto jumping out of the fray. One had to be careful using it, though - even a thirty meter standing leap could sometimes be inadequate, and the technique left you dangerously weak for several moments before you could continue your escape.
His most prized secrets - his father's two thieving schools - he kept to himself, though. Useful as they were, they were still much too powerful for proliferation, and he had to keep something back to hand down to his heirs.
Finally, the day of departure arrived. Gifts, well-wishes and googly-eyed stares were exchanged (the latter on the part of they younger girls who had not yet been treated to the sight of Ranma's male form), challenges were made and accepted (between heartbroken boys and girls who wished to drown their sorrows at losing the most desirable members of the opposite sex on the same day in the arms of one another); and stupid idiots were beaten into submission (two counts, one involving improper behaviour for a slave, and the other a too-ardent admirer of Xian Pu's who objected to the terms of the bargain). All in all, it was an eventful morning.
A full day of travel later, the band made camp for the night. Ranma volunteered for second watch - it seemed the appropriate thing to do, and it would give him some opportunity to think. But any serious thinking slipped out of his mind completely when the nude form of Xian Pu joined him a little after his father had gone into their tent.
At Ranma's goggle-eyed stare, Xian Pu grinned wickedly. "Xian Pu and Ranma supposed to make baby, right?"
"Yeah, but... not right now!" Ranma squeaked. Xian Pu's smile only widened.
"Great-grandmother no mind we practice," she wispered seductively...
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(Posted Sat, 21 Aug 2004 03:32)
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