The Ucchan’s was currently closed. That fact itself was hardly surprising, considering that Ukyou tended to close her restaurant whenever the need arose. Surprising was that Ukyou, Akane and Shampoo were currently inside the building and nothing had been broken yet…nor did it look like something like that would happen anytime soon. All of them were taking a breather from the most recent and obviously unsuccessful Shinji-chasing.
For Konatsu, who was currently watching the girls from the shadows of the stairwell, the scene they represented was surprising…and very disconcerting.
“You want one as well?” asked Ukyou as she turned on her grill to make herself an okonomiyaki.
“Why are you offering?” came the suspicious question from Akane’s side.
Normally that alone would have been enough to set Ukyou off, Konatsu knew, but instead his mistress only sighed tiredly. “Because we have to talk, and I would rather do so in a friendly way, if you don’t mind.”
“…oh...then I’ll take one, Please.”
“Shampoo have one too.” The Chinese Amazon said, her normally happy countenance marred by frustration and tiredness, not surprising when one considered the events of the day. They had been chasing after Shinji like usual, but this time he had somehow evaded them all, making it quite clear that he did not want to have anything to do with either of them.
That fact left all of them in a very subdued mood.
After a few minutes of silence, during which Ukyou started cooking, Akane was the first to speak because the presence of her rivals was making her uncomfortable. “So, what did you want to talk about?”
“Shinji.”
Akane glowered in annoyance. “What’s there to talk about that baka hentai?”
Ukyou did not say anything for a few seconds, busying herself with serving each of them an okonomiyaki. Once that was done, Ukyou fixed Akane with a steady gaze. “This whole situation is getting out of control Akane. Maybe you haven’t noticed, but Shinji is avoiding the three of us more and more. Things can’t go on like this.”
Akane took a bite from her plate, barely tasting the food. “What do you want to do about it?”
“I want to know if you love him.”
The request was delivered so casually that it took several seconds for Akane to understand it, but when she did her face turned red and the usual protests started flowing. “Me? Love that idiot? You know as well as everyone else that I’m only his fiancée because of our parents! I don’t want anything to do with him!”
“That’s what I wanted to hear.” Said Ukyou as she fished an envelope from under the grill and handed it to the youngest Tendo. “Once you’re finished eating you should bring this home. Tell your father and Mr. Saotome not to be late.”
Akane regarded the envelope carefully. “What is this?”
Ukyou merely gave a thin smile. “The answer to all your problems and one of mine.”
Not satisfied with that answer Akane glared at Ukyou over the last piece of her food. “What have you planned this time?”
“Nothing much, “said Ukyou ruefully, “I have just realized that it is time to take the kid gloves off in this little game . I never wanted this to happen, but I don’t see how the situation will change otherwise.”
Needless to say, that was not very informative and only served to make Akane very worried. Quickly scarving down the last bite Shinji-style she stood up to go home. “Thanks for the food, Ukyou. I’ll go now and give my father your letter.” She said and vanished out the door.
“Shampoo no like this. Spatula-girl seem very serious.”
“I am serious…” said Ukyou and slapped a small booklet onto the countertop, “…about asking to become your co wife.”
For the next moments Shampoo kept alternating her stare between the chef and the copy of the Amazon law said chef had slapped onto the table. “What you is talking about?” she asked finally, her brain still stuck in the mud.
“I’m talking about law number 134a in that little book of yours, which says an Amazon can share her husband with other women, even if she/they is/are an outsider.”
“Shampoo know that! Shampoo no understand why you want share airen now!” said Shampoo a little indignantly.
“Because I’m tired of this, Shampoo. Shinji isn’t spending any time with any of us, mainly because we are too busy fighting each other. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life like this. I’d rather share his time with you instead of not having any of his time at all.”
Shampoo regarded Ukyou intently, making the chef slightly nervous. ”What?!”
“Shampoo agree to have you as co wife under one condition.”
“And that is?”
The next moment a leer broke out over Shampoo’s normally innocent features. “You is going to have nookie with Shampoo to make up for nookie she lose with husband!”
A crash from the stairs signalled that Konatsu had just hit the land of the sleeping…hard.
Ukyou herself couldn’t be bothered to notice that and kept opening and closing her mouth, the ability to form words out of her reach for the moment.
At that moment, fate chose to throw Ukyou another curveball in the form of two new guests.
-----------------------------------
Shinji followed obediently after Nabiki, who had stepped into the place called ‘Ucchan’s’ without even knocking. For Shinji, such a breach of etiquette was enough to make him nervous. Catching sight of two of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen after stepping through was enough for him to nearly burst a few blood vessels.
All in all the day he been so far off the ‘weird scale’ it was not even funny, but the smiles that grew on the girls’ faces when they saw him assured him that it could only get worse from here on out.The one behind the counter looks a little out of it, though a small part of him noted.
That did not stop the purple haired bombshell, which was his Amazonian wife if Nabiki’s info could be trusted, from immediately launching herself in his direction.
He was only saved from the (admittedly nice) fate of being caught in a full body hug by Shampoo thanks to Nabiki’s outstretched hand. “Get a grip Shampoo.” She said coldly.
It was enough to stop the other girl, whose face immediately transformed from a friendly smile to a mean glare. ”What mercenary girl doing? You is keeping airen for yourself, yes?”
“No, I’m merely making sure you silly girls don’t break him.”
“What are talking about Nabiki?” said Ukyou, who had finally gotten her wits back together, “It’s not like either of us has a chance of laying a finger on Shinji.”
“And that’s were you are wrong, because that was only true until about 5 hours ago. Now keep your mouth shut and listen…”
------------------------
10 minutes later
“Mercenary girl silly if she think Shampoo believe that. Only plot to make her give up on husband.” Said Shampoo angrily, only the knowledge that Nabiki could make her life very hard keeping her in place for now.
“I second that.” Was Ukyou’s casual answer, “You can’t expect us to believe that without proof.”
Instead of saying anything else Nabiki upended part of her glass of water, which Ukyou had given to her at her request, over Shinji’s head. “Proof one.” She said casually despite Shinji’s still male state of being. The rest of the water quickly found its way into Shampoo’s face, who vanished inside her clothes at once. Still with a casual air about her Nabiki fished Shampoo-neko out and handed her over to Shinji, who took the purple cat into his hands without protest. “Proof two:” Nabiki said.
After several moments Ukyou and Shampoo-neko, both of whom had been cringing with closed eyes at Shinji’s expected adverse reaction peered carefully at the boy’s face, only to find him staring in fascination at the little cat in his hands. “Are you really Shampoo?” he asked curiously.
Shinji’s normal reaction to Shampoo’s cat form always struck the Amazon’s heart badly, even though she knew on an intellectual level that he didn’t have a choice in the matter. Hence, the absence of said normal reaction was enough make Shampoo more happy then she had been in a long time. That, more then anything else made her forget for a few moments that it wasn’t really _her_ Shinji holding her, so she did what came natural, and snuggled into the boy’s arms without thinking. This is what being a cat is about the Amazon thought contently.
Shinji, who had already more than enough shocks that day, simply started stroking the cat, because it seemed the natural thing to do. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
Meanwhile Ukyou was using one hand to steady herself on the countertop. “I can’t believe this. You really aren’t the Shinji I remember, are you?” she asked, her voice small.
“Sorry, but I’m not.”
Nabiki, who had already fetched a glass of warm water, rolled her eyes. “Stop apologizing for everything Shinji-kun, and stop playing kitten Shampoo!” she said with annoyance, quickly dousing the cat with warm water.
Said cat was still in Shinji’s arms, though, and the boy suddenly found himself handling over a hundred pounds of curvy Amazon. ”ACK” he exclaimed as he dropped the girl to the ground, mostly because she was too heavy for him to hold. ”I’msorry I’msorry…”
In answer to Shinji’s non-stop muttering Shampoo merely struck a pose. “Airen can look all he want!”
*Crash*
And once again Shinji was in dreamland.
While Shampoo got her dress back on and Ukyou, who was a little unsteady on her feet, moved to check on the fallen Shinji, Nabiki was still wondering just why she had doused Shampoo while the girl was still in Shinji’s arms. Did I want her gone from there?
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(Posted Tue, 01 Feb 2005 23:12)
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