They were then freed of all diseases, malformations, crippling conditions, curses, and unhealthy syndromes. Which negated the whole "forced to wear high heels" part of the earlier transformation. It also left the transformees able to think clearly and precisely until they could get back on track. Most people could stumble across the truth but would pick themselves right back up and act as if nothing had happened. For a brief window after the transformation, normal human behavior was put aside and truth could be recognized as truth.
It could not be Ranma's fault. For Ranma to have done this would require he even know what sexual sensitivity was among other things - and based on past behavior this would require odds like winning a multi-national lottery while being hit by lightning. Even if he had run across magic that would do such a thing, it was more likely that he would have tried to cure his curse and even the most intelligent couldn't think of how a curse-cure could manage this sort of thing.
On the other hand, Happosai was entirely believable. Did it involve women's undergarments? Yes - everyone was having to discard their smaller sized bras and buy ones with greater capacity. Was it sincerely lacking in restraint, forethought, and regard to consequence? Yes, that definitely seemed to be the case. Did Happosai take advantage of the period that women were flat on their back and helpless to protect their clothing? Most definitely. Was it perverted?
Once this reasoning chain was explained, nearly everyone who had ever interacted with the dread Master of Anything Goes realized that the most likely culprit was not Ranma at all.
"THIS IS ALL HAPPOSAI'S FAULT!"
"Wait a minute, this 'Happosai' has been around hundreds of years, right?" asked Samantha Carter, her tail lashing back and forth behind her.
"You don't think...?" Doctor Frazier saw it immediately.
"This isn't exactly typical behavior for one of them," protested Daniel.
Jack opened his mouth, closed it, then began shaking his head. "No no no no no. No. You're not saying that shorty there is a Goa'uld?"
"I have heard of insane Goa'uld before," confessed Teal'c.
"Insane even by the standards of a Goa'uld?" asked Captain Carter. "I don't think any of them are exactly well adjusted from what we've seen."
"Perhaps one of their scientists, and he experimented a few times too many on himself?" asked Daniel. "Defective sarcophogus maybe?"
"Whoa," said Jack, feeling pieces of the puzzle fitting together. The picture didn't look right but they only had a few pieces anyway. "So Pervert McNugget there could be a Goa'uld scientist left behind? Look at this guy's picture - I wouldn't trust him to plan a picnic."
"Nobody trusts Happosai," said Tezuka as he entered the room bearing a bucket of chicken. "I got Original Recipe and Oven Roasted. Will this be sufficient?"
Sam sniffed the air and licked her lips. Mmmmmmm. Chicken.
"WHOA!" said the dread Master Of Anything Goes.
Okay, this was different. It was one thing to be chased by violence-threatening women intent on bludgeoning you with whatever blunt weapon of opportunity presented itself. He could easily stay ahead of normal women and lead them on a merry chase.
The problem was that normal had been discarded recently.
Overhead he could hear the girls with the white wings talking on their cell phones to ground-based colleagues. If he stepped into the open, their sharp eyes would spot him and relay to their compatriots.
Behind him bounded catgirls who were faster than they had been, with claws that shredded his happodaikaren when he tried to leave them as "gifts" for his pursuers.
Keeping up a tireless pace and tracking him by scent until he wised up and took precautions had been the dog-girls. They still kept trying though, and he was out of pepper. As for those gynoids, one punch from one of those and he'd felt the sort of impact he'd have expected from a wrecking ball. As for those succubi - he'd only seen them a few times and they just found his current predicament amusing somehow.
He had to hide, rest, recover.
Ah. There was a good place.
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(Posted Sun, 22 May 2005 04:20)
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