“Hey, Setsuna, can I talk to you for a minute?”
“We can talk after I see my husband.”
Oh, boy. This is going to be fun. Nabiki walked after her retreating friend, trying to stop her before she embarrassed herself. However, it wasn’t necessary; the two of them had walked into the family room just in time to see Akane knock a glass of water onto the pigtailed martial artist. The subsequent change kept everyone from noticing the presence of the newcomer.
Akane stared at the busty redhead (much like everyone else in the room). “R-Ranma? Is that you?”
The redheaded girl (who looked a few years younger than Ranma’s male form) sighed and nodded. “Yeah, it’s me.”
With that, Ranma told the story of how she had gotten her curse at Jusenkyo (leaving out part about the wedding band—after all, the fathers didn’t know about that).
“So there’s no cure for your… condition?”
“Well… not exactly…”
Ranma turned to Shampoo, who was apparently supposed to be filling in for the local guide while he was on vacation, but had gotten distracted by her training for an upcoming martial arts tournament in her village. “Well, is there a Spring of Drowned Boy around here that can fix this?”
“Yes, Nannichuan is right over there,” replied the lavender haired teenager, who pointed to a pole-less spring that was isolated from the rest. “But there problem—”
“Woohoo!” Shouted the neo-girl as she ran towards the spring, clearly not caring what the substitute Jusenkyo guide had to say. With a joyful squeal, Ranma cannonballed into the Nannichuan. Her response was immediate. “YEEEOOWCH!!” A nearly scaled Ranma, male once again, rocketed out of the spring with even more speed than his entrance. The young man, who’s skin had already turned pink from the heat, gasped for breath after collapsing at his father’s feet.
“Shampoo no have chance to tell you. Nannichuan is hot spring.”
“Yeah… I probably shoulda listened ta ya before jumpin’ in, huh?”
“Yes, boy, you certainly should have listened to her.” Genma never missed an opportunity to sound “fatherly”—though he rarely succeeded, since he apparently thought a fatherliness consisted of restating the obvious in a sage tone of voice (and Genma rarely got the tone of voice right).
“Well, at least I’m cured.” Ranma’s good feeling was interrupted by Shampoo clearing her throat.
“Uh, no, you not exactly cured…”
“Whaddya mean? I jumped in the Spring of Drowned Boy, right? So I’m cured!” To prove it, he walked over to his pack, took out his canteen, and emptied the contents over his head. “See? No… change… ah, shit.” Much to Ranma’s dismay, she was once again in her female form. The redhead slumped to the ground. She looked like she was going to break out in tears at any second.
“Like Shampoo say, Nannichuan is hot spring. When have Drowned Boy curse, turn into boy when splashed with hot water.”
“So ain’t there any cure?”
“For Nyannichuan? Yes, healers in tribe know dozen or so.”
“Great! What do I do?”
Shampoo sighed. She hated giving bad news. “Shampoo sorry, but cures no work when have Nannichuan curse as well. You just have to live with it.”
“No… cure?” Ranma looked over at her father, expected to find him disappointed, but to her surprise he was acting panicky, as if ninjas from the Hypercorp Credit Card Company were going to ambush him within at any minute (in fact, Hypercorp’s ninjamarketers had been getting ready to ambush Genma, but they reconsidered when they realized the dangers of fighting in the vicinity of a bunch of cursed springs—but that’s not why Ranma’s father was panicking).
“No worry, you not first idiot to jump in Nannichuan.” Ranma dimly overheard the teenaged girl’s attempt to comfort him. “You come to village with Shampoo—fix you up with support group.”
Ranma sighed. I guess it’s better than nuthin’. “Lead the way, Shampoo.”
“No worry, is not far, just on top of hill. Amazon village of Joketsuzoku.”
“Wait. Did you say Amazons?”
“Yes. Why, you heard of us?”
Ranma didn’t reply; instead, she walked over to a sturdy tree, and slammed her forehead against it until she was once again in the sweet embrace of unconsciousness.
Soun had his hand on his chin and a thoughtful look on his face as the girl finished. “Well, Ranma, that was certainly poor judgment on your part, but I think it’s safe to say that you’ve learned your lesson, correct?”
“Yessir.”
“Well, then, there’s no problem at all!” Soun exclaimed happily, as he slapped the redheaded girl on the back.
“Huh?”
Soun re-introduced his daughters to Ranma.
“Kasumi—twenty years old…
Akane—seventeen…
And Nabiki’s around here somewhere, but she’s eighteen years old.”
“Uh…”
“Pick whichever one you want, and she’ll be your fiancée.”
“Fiancée?!!!??!”
Everyone turned toward the source of the outburst, a tall, green-haired woman with red eyes and an expensive business suit who was standing next to Nabiki. Soun was especially puzzled; he figured this was one of his daughter’s clients, but he couldn’t explain why she would feel compelled to enter a private family matter.
“Yes. Ranma here is to wed one of my daughters to join the Saotome and Tendo schools of Anything Goes. Now who are you, and why does this concern you?”
Setsuna stood up straight, with the authority that comes from more than twenty millennia of experience (and perfect posture) she said, “My name is Setsuna Meioh, and this concerns me because I am Ranma’s wife.”
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(Posted Fri, 09 Dec 2005 01:40)
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