"What's up?"
"Well, you know Happosai's the founder of my martial arts school, and that he's Nerima's biggest pervert. You might have realized that several of his techniques are directly designed for stealing underwear and fondling girls."
"That would have been hard not to notice."
"What most people don't know is that my father and Akane's father are also... peculiar, although they hide it from the public. I've begun to worry that it isn't a coincidence; it looks like mastering the school inevitably leads to sexual perversion."
"Wow! And all this time Akane was shouting she was a real martial artist..."
"I'm not talking about Akane! Try and keep from daydreaming about her; whatever she says, she's far behind me in learning our school's secrets. Since her father can't be asked to teach her properly, she relies on training her strength and straight Kenpo."
"Damn," Hiroshi complained, "She'd look so hot in high heels and a leather corset."
Daisuke disagreed. "That kind of outfit usually comes with a whip..."
"Try to stay focused! I'm worried that it's going to make me into a pervert. Are you gonna help me? Or can you imagine what would happen if I took after Happosai!"
"That would be bad. What forms do the father's perversions take?"
"I'd rather not say. Can you imagine what Nabiki would do if I talked about it?"
"But their perversions are different from Happosai's, right? So perhaps you can choose one that isn't so... destructive."
"Exactly. But I don't know what choices there are. I sure as hell don't want to behave like any of the others."
"Maybe you're already safe. After all, Akane is always calling you a pervert."
"Naw. She says that regardless of whatever I do because she knows it bugs me; I don't wanna end up like my pops. Whenever I'm forced to deal with another fiancee, she insists I'm a pervert. But since she's already convinced all of the female classmates that I really am a pervert, there's no reason I shouldn't learn to be one; after all, they blame me for it already."
"What kind of perversion did you have in mind?"
"I dunno. Something involving girls. The last thing I need is to develop an interest in guy's underwear.
Hiroshi knew an opportunity like this might never come again. "You could become a master of Shibari, and learn to tie girls up so that they orgasmed if they struggled! Shibari even started out as a martial art!"
This was, of course, an exaggeration, although it had started as a means for the samurai class to restrain people. Still, the possibility existed that Ranma's perversion might provide eye candy, and the idea of the sight of nubile school girls, restrained and bringing themselves to orgasm appealed to him.
Daisuke added, "Or you could..."
Akane's friend's eyes were wide with surprise as they quietly left for safety. Once out of earshot, "Ranma's going to train to become a pervert because everyone in Akane's martial arts school eventually becomes one?"
"He doesn't care if he becomes a pervert because we're already calling him one?"
"Ranma, treating perversion as if it were martial arts? You know how good he gets when challenged!"
"And he might not be satisfied with just stealing underwear or spying on girls, but he's considering things like foreplay?" Upon noticing her friend's strange expression, she backpedaled, "Not that I consider shibari foreplay! I was just thinking about him fondling girls 'till they orgasmed." A pause. "I mean his perversion might involve actually touching girls! And since he could practice on his own body, he might actually learn how to do it really really well." Another pause, "I didn't mean to imply..."
Before it could get more out of hand her friend interrupted, "We'd better get the other girls! There might be time to stop this!"
"Should we get Akane?"
"Do you want to tell her she has to stop calling him a pervert? Do you want to tell her we know her father is one, and that she's in training to be one?"
"Right!"
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(Posted Wed, 24 May 2006 18:30)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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