"She's not dead," said Haruka, dropping the chair she'd used to brain the would-be blackmailer. "She's just resting a bit."
"Resting? She has no pulse," insisted Michiru. "She's not breathing, no pulse, and..." Michiru lifted one arm up, then dropped it. There was no sign of gravity failing. "She's stone dead!"
"Nonononono," said Haruka, backing away slightly. "She's just resting."
Michiru looked flatly at the stranger. "All right then, if she's resting - I'll just wake her up." She put her mouth next to the dead girl's ear. "HELLO, MISS MEIOU! I'VE GOT A CUTTLEFISH I'M GONNA STICK IN YOUR PANTIES IF YOU DON'T -"
Haruka reached out and kicked a leg. "There! She moved!"
"No she didn't, that was you kicking a corpse!" said a somewhat panicked herself Michiru.
"I never!" insisted Haruka.
"Yes you did!" responded Michiru.
"I never, never did," said Haruka, whose odd thought at the moment was that she didn't want to go to a women's prison because they didn't have racetracks.
Michiru was getting annoyed and began shaking the corpse. "HELLO, BLACKMAILER! Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your wake up call! Columbian Coffee being served in the starboard lounge!"
Seeing the still disbelieving expression on the murderess' face, Michiru began slapping the corpse across the face and then hefted her up briefly in order to drop her back down. "Now THAT is a dead woman!"
"No, no, she's just stunned," tried Haruka.
"STUNNED?!" practically screeched Michiru. Her record career could have taken off, but now she'd be breaking big rocks into little rocks. She didn't LIKE manual labor.
"Yeah, you stunned her, just as she was waking up," said Haruka, nodding as if this made sense. "She's from Okinawa, looks like. They stun easily."
"Look, I've had about enough of this," said Michiru. The other girl might be attractive, but there were limits. "That bird is definitely deceased. You waited until she was talking to me again, picked up that wooden chair, and thwacked her quite hard across the back of the head. I expected you to knock her out, not make me an accomplice to murder."
"Well," said Haruka, thinking that that HAD been her intent. "She's just - she's just - pining for the ocean."
"PINING FOR THE OCEAN?!" asked Michiru. "What kind of talk is that? Look, you got blood on the chair!"
Haruka quickly wiped it off, then looked for something to clean the blood off her hand. She finally got a hankerchief out of a handbag and used that.
"That was MY handbag, you know," pointed out Michiru.
"Yes, well," said Haruka.
"Hmmm? If she's pining for the ocean, maybe we should take her there?" speculated Michiru.
"Yeah, that'll work," said Haruka, realizing the plan. "Okay, you take her legs."
Setsuna smiled as she let the tape continue recording. The clone body was 65% more fragile than a human body, and would dissolve in six hours. Not before she got some interesting photos.
She'd have her Team Poison, or Team Rocket. Whatever. They'd be able to take care of Ranma Saotome once and for all.
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(Posted Tue, 16 May 2006 21:31)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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