“Guide think nephew not afraid of big monsters, but should be scared of something else,” said the Guide. Crossing his arms over his chest, he looked down at his nephew with a twitch to his left eyebrow.
“Uncle,” Tro-Bal spoke as he turned to his relative. “Where were you? You were gone a long time?”
Looking down at his troublesome nephew, the Jusenkyo Tour Guide let off a sigh. “Tro-Bal...” he said slowly. “I was with the Joketsuzoku Amazons, talking about many things... Especially these springs.”
Smiling brightly, Tro-Bal asked his uncle, “Do you like them? I think they’re neat!”
“They are NOT ‘neat’!” The Jusenkyo Tour Guide shouted. “I mean, look at this place! It as bad enough when there were mixed springs and Spring of Drowned Ashura!” No sir, the tour guide of Jusenkyo was NOT happy about this in the slightest! his chest heaving underneath his Maoist uniform from screaming so loud.
Tro-Bal looked his uncle up and down. “I think you need to lose some weight, uncle. It’s not good for you to be doing strenuous activity in your condition.”
“My condition?” The Jusenkyo Guide asked. “Nephew, you should be worried about YOUR condition when I’m through with you!” He started walking off, shouted, “Just wait until I find a good bamboo rod!”
His eyes widening, Tro-Bal’s mind started moving the gears at high-speed, trying to think of something, anything, to save his ass from the punishment that was sure to come across his backside. “Wait, uncle!” He shouted after the older man, who was already heading into a grove with lots of plant-life.
Looking over a growth of bamboo poles, the Jusenkyo Guide grasped one tightly. Hmm, it crushed too easily in his grip, too thin! “I’m not listening...” he responded to the annoying brat as he grabbed another pole.
“Please uncle, you must listen!” Tro-Bal cried out. “I... I did what I had to, to save Jusenkyo!” Okay, it was stretching it, but it was the first plausible excuse the boy could come up with off of the top of his head.
“Save Jusenkyo?” The Guide scoffed. “Nephew, do you take me for a fool? I may have been born at night, but it wasn’t last night.” And so, he continued searching deeper into the brush of bamboo. He smiled and plucked a piece. It was hard like he wanted, but not too long. Ah well, if he found nothing else, he at least had a stand-by with which to punish his no-good, troublesome nephew. Oh he was SO having words with his brother when he and his wife came back to pick up their son!
“Well, uh...” Tro-Bal had some choice words about what he thought of his uncle, but was smart enough to keep his mouth shut on it. He didn’t want a beating. “But, Uncle! I’m being serious! I was only doing what I did as to give you job security!”
Grabbing anotherr piece of bamboo and bending it, the Jusenkyo Tour Guide shook his head. “Save my job? BAH! You were only looking out for your own entertainment, Nephew,” he told the young boy as he reached for another piece of growing bamboo.
He had to let go of it. Ewww! Maggots!
His eyes widening, Tro-Bal continued, “No! I’m serious! When was the last time you had ANY paying visitors here before theese last two!?”
THAT made the Guide stop. “...Was seventeen or so year ago. Old man happen to visit on same day pregnant woman did. Poor child was bathed in cursed spring...” the older Chinese man had to suppress a shiver at that. Oh, what a horrible sight! This was why he HATED the mixed springs.
“Exactly!” Tro-bal cried, feeling he had some leverage now. “Seventeen years ago! Not much in way of pay, I take it?”
The Tour Guide considered that for a moment. It was true. He did receive a very modest base salary from the Jusenkyo Tour Guide Committee, but it wasn’t much to get by on, hence his humble shack. Anything else, he was completely dependant on the generosity of visitors...
...Which, for ones that actually paid, were few and far between. Even these last two stiffed him in all the confusion!
Slowly, the Jusenkyo Tour Guide turned to his nephew. Sure, he was still rather annoyed with his kin, (almost being eaten by a rabbit would do that to a person) but this was a subject he was interested in. “What is Nephew trying to say?”
Grinning, Tro-Bal began to explain to his older relative, “There’s this American devil book called ‘Jurassic Park’. All about man that brings back dinosaurs and opens a big park in an island. People come, see the animals, and he makes big money.”
Blinking his eyes, the Jusenkyo Tour Guide asked, “What does dinosaurs have to do with Jusenkyo!?”
Tro-Bal pointed to the large Kamakuras and now the ankylosaur which seemed to have appeared from out of nowhere.
“...Were they successful in the book?” The Jusenkyo Guide asked his nephew seriously.
Nodding his head, Tro-Bal answered. “I think so. I wasn’t able to get a full copy before I had to pull the plug on my computer, but a friend I know who finished it mentioned them having trouble with a water ride.”
Thinking about that for a moment, the Jusenkyo Tour Guide had to agree with the sentiment. Water-rides out here in Jusenkyo could ONLY lead to trouble.
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(Posted Thu, 27 Jul 2006 00:22)
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