Truth be told, Ukyo Kuonji had to admit that lucid dreaming was a pretty cool concept — there was a definite appeal to controlling an entire world, to being able to do whatever (and to a lesser extent, whoever) one wanted. Unfortunately, for Ukyo lucid dreaming was little more than a concept, she always woke up whenever she realized she was dreaming. It was as though some part of her mind had decided that reality was the best from of experience there was, and as a result, this part of her mind was determined to never let the rest of her have any fun. The chef didn’t know quite why her subconscious was so determined to be a spoilsport, but she suspected that having to deal with the hard realities of running a small business had something to do with it; she was simply too practical for her own good.
This was ironic for several reasons. First, it closed off to her mind one of the most pleasant and entertaining forms of escapism imaginable, forcing her to keep her attention on the stresses of her real life. Second (and far more importantly), it appeared as though her telepathic link with Ranma turned most of her dreams into lucid ones, at least if this past night had been any indication, which in turn meant that she couldn’t dream at all, and therefore wouldn’t be able to get a good night’s sleep. And a good night’s sleep was absolutely essential for someone whose schedule was as packed as hers. Sure, she could handle one or two restless nights, but if this became a regular occurrence, she’d be in trouble.
Such was the train of thought that floated through Ukyo’s still-hazy stream of consciousness as she stared at her alarm clock after waking up for the seventh time that night. 5:00 AM… Damn, looks like this night’s a bust. Might as well get up. The okonomiyaki chef somehow managed to pull herself out of bed and trudge towards her bathroom for a nice, invigorating shower (which she preferred over a traditional furo because it saved money — though Konatsu still contended that it was far cheaper to find a [preferably isolated] stream in which one might cleanse oneself). Along the way, she managed to stub her toe on her dresser, which did little to improve her mood.
As Ukyo stood under the showerhead, attempting to wash the sleep out of her eyes, she idly noticed that she wasn’t picking anything up from Ranma. He’s probably still asleep, she thought to herself. And doing Kami-sama knows what with the others. Of course, Ukyo didn’t really think that any of the other four telepaths were doing the nasty in Lucid Dreamland — even if they wanted to (a condition Ukyo wasn’t entirely certain was true in the first place), the presence of someone as prudish as Akane would no doubt deflate any desire for sexual shenanigans rather quickly.
Well, maybe not Kodachi…. Ukyo’s final attempt to join the dream had seemed to last much longer than all the other times, which the chef now realized was likely the result of the others concerted attempts to keep from waking her by mentioning it was a dream. However, even that was short-lived, as Kodachi had reached the limit of her patience and demanded that somebody take advantage of her. When she received four rather firm refusals, she’d reacted by bluntly telling the chef that she was dreaming. A bitch and a pervert — I really feel sorry for Ranchan now.
Ah, don’t trouble yerself over it.
Ranchan? You’re awake.
Uh-huh. I usually wake up around dawn anyway, but I figured I’d get up a little early ta see if ya were okay.
I’ll be fine. I’m just really sleepy, that’s all.
Uh, yeah. Sorry ’bout that.
Don’t be. It isn’t as though you could have known. Though I suppose I’ll have to learn how to have lucid dreams if I want a full night’s sleep from now on.
Well, at least I can help ya out there. Don’t worry; it’s real easy once ya get the hang of it.
Thanks, Ranchan. So, what exactly did you guys dream about? From what I can remember, it seemed like you spent most of the time talking.
Actually, that’s pretty much all that happened. Shampoo, Akane, an’ me decided ta take advantage of the fact that it seemed like we weren’t hearin’ each other in our heads and decided ta just try ta have some kinda normal conversation, while Kodachi tried ta be “seductive,” but all she managed ta do is make Akane feel nauseous.
Sigh…. That girl has got to get over some of her hangups.
I’m gonna ignore the fact that ya just thought the word “sigh” an’ go ahead an’ agree with ya there.
Ukyo felt a bit embarrassed as she realized that she had indeed transmitted the word “sigh” instead of a mental representation of a sigh, but she managed to get off that train of thought by bringing up another pertinent subject. Your ideas about sex aren’t much better. I mean, it’s nice that you aren’t obsessed with it the way other guys are, but you don’t need to be so dismissive of it, either.
I just don’t get what the big deal is. I mean, I understand how havin’ a kid is a real important thing for a couple, but I sure ain’t ready to have one with anybody right now, so why should I care?
Ranma, there’s more to sex than just making babies.
Yeah, I know it feels real good, too, but if I want that, I can just jerk off. Don’t see why a girl’s even gotta be there unless yer tryin’ ta make a baby, much less all the weird stuff Hiroshi and Daisuke are always yammerin’ about.
What about intimacy?
Unfortunately, Ranma wasn’t willing to discuss this further. Sorry, Ucchan, gotta go — Pops just woke up, an’ that means it’s sparrin’ time. Can we pick this up some other time?
Ukyo sighed in defeat (for real this time). Sure, Ranchan.
Great! See ya at school — whoa!
As Ranma’s attention swerved to something else (presumably an attack from his father), Ukyo finished rinsing off and stepped out of the shower to dry. She slowly shook her head as she tried to process everything that had happened; it had been less than 24 hours since that airhead of a genie had managed to make her life (and the lives of four other teenagers) immensely complicated, even by Neriman standards, and her instincts were telling her that things were going to get worse before they got better. Then again, maybe I’m just being paranoid. Still, I can’t help but wonder what’s coming next.
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(Posted Thu, 22 Mar 2007 04:20)
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