"According to this, 987 BC, China. You're dressed like that because you're one of the concubines of King Mu Wang," said Mercury.
"Oh, I see, that makes sense," said Sailor Mars. "That's... what?"
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
"Who dares interrupt the Emperor," said a guard, rushing forward with his spear.
THUNK CHUNK PING
The Emperor looked up from his current busywork (fondling the bared breast of his newest concubine) and glanced up at the noise. "What?"
The door crashed in, with one of the palace guards coming down in the wreckage.
"Who dares?!" asked the Emperor, more angry than anything else.
"I dare," said a young-looking man, walking through the wreckage. "You were warned. Don't attack or attempt to annex the Monastery Of The Wild Stallion."
"GUARDS!" called out the Emperor.
The boy cracked his knuckles. "If you want any of those that were in the two courtyards, you're gonna have to replace them."
"Who are you?" asked the Emperor, who was absolutely not hiding behind his concubine.
"I am Ranma," said the youth. "You attacked my monastery with troops, and we sent them away with that warning. You sent assassins. Now, I'm going to point something out to you."
"GUARDS!" tried the Emperor again.
"Try and find 'em," said Ranma. "Now, I'll tell you how it's gonna be. You're going to sign a little paper that states you're leaving my place alone. Period. No more assassins. No more troops. If you want to send soldiers by every so often to test them, that's fine. Send a notice ahead of time though or all you'll get are their heads back. Oh, and I'll take that gal there as payment for the trouble you've caused."
"And what if I refuse?" growled the Emperor.
"You might want to look at what's left of your army before you decide to take that path," said Ranma. "Be civilized with me, and I'll be civilized with you. Fail that, and all bets are off."
"You can't tell me what to do, I'm the Emperor!"
"Keep it up, and you'll be the Late Emperor," said Ranma. "You can do pretty much whatever you want in your own territory. When the Silver Millenium fell, I went to the mountains and began building my fortress - YOUR people weren't doing anything even remotely civilized. While YOUR people were making bronze knives, my fortress already had iron being worked. When YOUR people were first uniting under the Yellow Emperor, I came down and had an agreement with him. Just a moment."
A guard charged from cover. With contemptuous ease, the stripling youth moved out of the way, shattered the sword with a touch, tapped the back of the guard's helmet (which also shattered as if of thin pottery instead of bronze-backed leather), and gave off the impression of lazy boredom as the guard dropped.
"You..." King Mu Wang swallowed nervously. Ancient legends began coming back to him, even as he tried to keep the concubine between himself and this now-proven-to-be-dangerous youth. "You're the Wild Stallion Of The Mountains."
"That's one of the names they keep giving me," said the youth, now looking annoyed. "I'm Ranma. I've been training martial artists for a whole long time now, and all the other Arts that have come into that place. It's my territory. Under my protection. Don't make me come conquer your little kingdom, I don't want the hassle. Which is one reason you're still alive. Don't make me angry."
"The agreement with the Yellow Emperor had passed into myth," said Mu Wang, trying to reclaim some composure. Which was difficult when you were mainly undressed and trying to hid behind an even more undressed concubine. "Now that I know you do indeed exist, I shall honor that agreement."
"Uh huh," said Ranma, open skepticism showing. "Whatever. About the girl."
"Take her, with my compliments," said Mu Wang, ignoring the frightened squeak from the girl in question. "She has been trained in many of the courtesan arts."
"Yeah, well, we'll see if she can learn some martial arts when we get her home," said Ranma. All this hassle and he just wanted to get on with things. "Snoopy!"
A beagle in black clothing dropped from the shadows of the ceiling where he'd been unnoticed by king and concubine alike. He presented the document for the King to sign, though the King was currently staring at the black-clad beagle. A clearing throat jolted the King back into movement.
The concubine found herself being collared and led by the dog on a leash before she had clearly come to terms with the idea of a dog with a little ninja sword strapped to his back.
"Ninja beagle, huh?" asked Ranma. "Come on, let's get everyone back to the mountains. Hopefully we won't have to come back until they've invented better sanitation and stuff."
Read the comments on this episode
(Posted Sat, 30 Jun 2007 20:37)
Questions? Problems? Suggestions?
Send a mail to addventure@bast-enterprises.de
or use the contact form.
らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
All other series and their characters are © by their respective creators or owners. No claims of ownership of these characters are implied by the authors of this Addventure, or should be inferred.
The Anime Addventure is a non-profit site.